mahovalia

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Offline (the 12/14/2014 at 2:01pm)

mahovalia

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  • Number of visits : 8400
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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mahovalia's page activity

Visits<b>reins0069</b> - the 07/25/2015 at 8:56pm<b>Marelena20</b> - the 04/21/2015 at 3:08pm<b>Mafia_</b> - the 02/14/2015 at 9:50pm<b>jquaw</b> - the 12/29/2014 at 2:29am<b>SkullduggeryCain</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 6:00pm<b>j_cat187</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 5:38am<b>imapartypooper</b> - the 12/12/2014 at 8:58am<b>Wizardo</b> - the 12/05/2014 at 3:31pm<b>brndnmcmillan</b> - the 12/04/2014 at 4:43pm<b>ironhead</b> - the 12/01/2014 at 9:41pm<b>ShatteredPulse</b> - the 11/29/2014 at 2:22am<b>serslybro</b> - the 11/27/2014 at 2:12am<b>OhWhoCares</b> - the 11/26/2014 at 3:42pm<b>LikeYouGiveAShit</b> - the 11/26/2014 at 3:36pm<b>Crenny</b> - the 11/19/2014 at 5:32pm<b>Vanillanougat</b> - the 11/17/2014 at 9:28pm<b>emmama19</b> - the 11/17/2014 at 12:02am<b>ajh557</b> - the 11/13/2014 at 5:12pm

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Keen reader – Level: master ninja

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mahovalia's favorite FMLs

Today, my long-distance girlfriend drunk dialed me and told me she was horny. Surprised, I exclaimed, "You're horny?" without realizing my boss was right next to me. FML

by Wallz99 / 04/19/2013 at 2:00am / Pakistan (Azad Kashmir) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend and I attempted sexting for the first time. After about twenty minutes of Star Wars references, I gave up. FML

by Anonymous / 04/19/2013 at 1:14am / Canada (Alberta) / Intimacy

Today, someone at my workplace yelled at me and filed a complaint for staring at them too often. I'm a lifeguard. FML

by lamelifeguard / 04/19/2013 at 1:07am / United States (Colorado) / Work

Today, I found a pound of cooked bacon in the dryer. When I asked my roommate about it, he confessed; his excuse was that he wanted to dry up the grease before eating it. FML

Today, I was at my little girl's concert. She plays the clarinet, and in the middle of her solo, her phone started ringing. She decided to stop, check her phone, and continue playing. FML

by Aberrombie Blue / 04/18/2013 at 7:01pm / United States (New Hampshire) / Kids

Today, I was again turned down by a potential host family on a student exchange site. Their reasoning was basically that since I'm American, I might do something to endanger my health, get hurt, and then sue them over my own stupidity. FML

by thanks, my fellow americans / 04/18/2013 at 5:41pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was riding my bike home from the store. Wanting to impress some passers-by, I tried to do a trick on a sharp turn. I hit a pole with my balls. As I was lying on the ground in agony, a guy pulled over, took a picture, and took off laughing. FML

by Anonymous / 04/18/2013 at 5:02pm / Bulgaria (Sofiya) / Health

Today, I got cut from my track team. My coach told me it was because my sprints were "too fast" for his liking. Huh? FML

by bhnja_ / 04/18/2013 at 4:34pm / Philippines (Mandaue) / Miscellaneous

Today, I briefly left my laptop while I went to use the toilet. When I came back, I found "I" had posted on Facebook, calling my mom a "stupid cunt who should just stay in the kitchen." The only other person home at the time was my grandpa. She didn't believe it, and permanently grounded me. FML

by phonesmuggler / 04/18/2013 at 3:30pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I tried to explain to my history teacher why Woodrow Wilson would not have called the Great War "World War 1" as she constantly claims. I was sent to the office for my insubordination. FML

by Anonymous / 04/18/2013 at 3:54am / United States (Illinois) / Work

Today, after years of loaning my mother countless amounts of cash that never get paid back, borrowing $60 from her, and being just one day late paying it off due to food poisoning, she sends a very large man to my door to collect, like she's Tony Soprano. FML

by some people's parents / 04/18/2013 at 12:01am / United States (Colorado) / Money

Today, my social teacher thought it would be a great idea to have a casual debate about Margaret Thatcher and her legacy. Within 10 minutes, the entire class was yelling, screaming, throwing stuff at each other. I got hit in the face with a binder. FML

by great idea / 04/10/2013 at 8:40pm / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had a friend "dump" me over Facebook. She apparently thought we were dating. I'm a gay man who's lived with his partner for 5 years. She says I have commitment issues. FML

by drama king? / 04/10/2013 at 6:17pm / United States (Missouri) / Love

Today, while walking to my car after work, I witnessed some moron who was texting while riding her bike running right into my parked car, resulting in a broken side mirror, a damaged windshield, two dents, and for her, a broken phone and nose. She's threatening to sue me for damages. FML

by Anon / 04/08/2013 at 6:04pm / United States (Ohio) / Transportation

Today, I picked my 12-year-old daughter up from school after her first sexual education lecture. She burst into tears on the way home explaining her fears of being pregnant with her boyfriend's child. As if that doesn't sound bad enough, I've met her boyfriend before. He is imaginary. FML

by anonymous / 04/04/2013 at 6:52pm / United States (California) / Kids