magicman13

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Offline (the 07/26/2016 at 4:56pm)

magicman13

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3885
  • Number of comments : 37
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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magicman13's page activity

Visits<b>Spencyy</b> - the 09/28/2015 at 11:27am<b>Aedan888</b> - the 09/25/2015 at 7:00am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/29/2015 at 12:16pm<b>hayshed</b> - the 05/16/2015 at 7:33pm<b>Hitman77</b> - the 05/02/2015 at 5:17am<b>Radgears47</b> - the 04/29/2015 at 3:15am<b>MikeonFML</b> - the 04/26/2015 at 9:44am<b>Cayers97</b> - the 04/25/2015 at 10:14pm<b>Glock34</b> - the 04/22/2015 at 4:42am<b>kukumber</b> - the 04/21/2015 at 10:58pm<b>Harley326</b> - the 10/08/2014 at 11:51pm<b>jtuttle99</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 12:56pm<b>bdun4</b> - the 07/25/2014 at 1:37am<b>srudez</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 10:47pm<b>captain_nick</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 10:40pm<b>slender_gab</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 8:32pm<b>cam25</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 6:56pm<b>the_zero_article</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 4:59pm

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/29/2015 at 6:16pm

magicman13's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of magicman13's badges

magicman13's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to work at the restaurant instead of going to the prom, which nobody asked me out to. For five hours, I got to shamefully greet and seat people on their way home from the prom, all of whom knew I was too lame to get asked out. FML

by annoyed teen / 04/12/2014 at 11:01pm / United States (Idaho) / Work

Today, my little brother was feeling like the god damned bratty douchebag he is and hurled a basketball at me. It missed, hit the wall, and rebounded straight into his face. He burst into tears, and I'm now grounded because my parents believed him when he said I threw it at him. FML

by vreenya / 04/08/2014 at 4:13pm / Chile (Region Metropolitana) / Kids

Today, I asked my girlfriend's dad for permission to take her hand in marriage. He said no, because he doesn't want her marrying a "sexist idiot who treats her like property", which he thinks asking permission amounts to, then told me to grow up. FML

by Anonymous / 01/19/2014 at 5:59pm / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, my 11 month-old son started viciously biting whatever part of my anatomy he can sink his teeth into. He thinks it is hysterical to latch on while I scream helplessly in pain for him to let go. FML

by Anonymous / 01/01/2014 at 12:38am / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, I have to spend the whole day in a moving truck with my dad. He had beans for dinner, and it's too cold to crack open a window. FML

by cb / 11/25/2013 at 1:58pm / United States (Indiana) / Transportation

Today, I decided to be friendly and say hi to the weird kid at school, who was sitting by himself eating lunch. After I said hello, he stared up at me intensely and said, "I don't have many friends. Yeah. Mainly 'cause I've eaten most of them." FML

by scared shitless in ohio / 09/25/2013 at 4:02pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, while working at a daycare, I had to change a kid's diaper. This may seem normal for a daycare worker, but not when it's a 7-year-old kid who is still not potty-trained and shat their pants. FML

by CrappyDay / 08/20/2013 at 1:14pm / United States / Kids

Today, my son asked me if the short films I write are for little kids or for adults. Since I write horror-filled films, I said it was for adults. He went and told his teacher that I made "adult films". FML

by Laila / 02/20/2013 at 7:01am / United States / Kids

Today, I was making out with my girlfriend, and things started getting pretty hot. That is, until I tried to remove her shirt. Somehow, I managed to grab her pajama shorts and give her a violent wedgie. FML

by shit.... / 11/08/2012 at 1:25pm / Malaysia (Selangor) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend and I were talking about being super heroes. He said I could be "The Period" because I'm a bitch. FML

by Anonymous / 08/25/2012 at 8:47am / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out where all my missing panties have gone, when my 12-year-old daughter was caught selling them to the boys at school. FML

by Anonymous / 05/09/2012 at 6:09pm / Egypt (Al Qahirah) / Kids

Today, I went to my Christian accountability partner from church to talk about continuing to maintain Christian values. We had sex. Oh, the irony. FML

by Badchristian / 04/05/2012 at 12:17am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend and I decided it was time to lose our virginity. After our clothes were removed, we spent 30 minutes trying to figure out how to actually have sex, and eventually gave up. FML

by Anonymous / 03/10/2012 at 2:23am / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend revealed to me that she has primeisodophobia. What is primeisodophobia, you may ask? Well, it's the fear of losing your virginity. FML

by virginkiller / 03/03/2012 at 8:23am / Singapore / Intimacy

Today, it appears that it's Single Loser Awareness Day. FML

by crazytown62 / 02/14/2012 at 10:32am / United States / Love