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magicman13

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magicman13

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  • Number of visits : 1827
  • Number of comments : 33
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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magicman13's favorite FMLs

Today, I met my new neighbor. His wi-fi access point is named "TheRapistDownstairs." FML

#17483730
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36977) - you deserved it (3468)

On 08/15/2011 at 8:30pm - misc - by creepedoutlady - United States

Today, my son drew in Sharpie all over the wall, so I spanked him as punishment. When my boss came over for dinner, my son shouted, "Daddy made me take my punishment in the butt." FML

#17338982
334 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43563) - you deserved it (14536)

On 08/02/2011 at 12:58am - kids - by ohcrap - United States (Colorado)

Today, my dad confessed that the only reason I'm alive today is because he couldn't afford to pay for an abortion. He couldn't afford it because he'd splashed out on brand new furniture at IKEA shortly before discovering my mom was pregnant. FML

#17333987
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34630) - you deserved it (2512)

On 08/01/2011 at 5:20pm - misc - by Savannah - United States (Alaska)

Today, I went to the beach. While I was swimming, I noticed a few really hot guys passing. Trying to be sexy, I slowly got out of the water, showing off my body. I showed a bit more than I expected when I realized my bikini bottom had fallen off. FML

#17322552
280 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26117) - you deserved it (35040)

On 07/31/2011 at 5:45pm - love - by iannie - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, while having sex, my boyfriend decided to sing the Star Wars theme song as he entered his penis into me. FML

#17304826
304 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37671) - you deserved it (9725)

On 07/30/2011 at 1:14am - intimacy - by Taylor - United States (Texas)

Today, while working at Kohl's this woman came up to me and asked if I was Native American, I said yes, she then says "Oh! I thought you guys went extinct." This is the country I live in. FML

#17297056
324 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42759) - you deserved it (3342)

On 07/29/2011 at 11:18am - work - by crazygirl12 - United States (Missouri)

Today, after babysitting, the parents actually tried to pay me in Trident Layers Gum. FML

#17207993
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44429) - you deserved it (4694)

On 07/21/2011 at 8:20pm - money - by iwantmoney - United States (Ohio)

Today, my boyfriend told me my vagina looks like an old man in a hat. It's OK though, he said it was a nice hat. FML

#17187875
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39178) - you deserved it (5368)

On 07/20/2011 at 5:17am - intimacy - by growlr - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, while at my job at a Christian summer camp, I overheard one of the kids swearing. I politely said, "Please, only speak as Jesus would." He paused for a moment and replied, "Go to hell." FML

#17109395
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19637) - you deserved it (46999)

On 07/14/2011 at 4:14pm - work - by sbutler (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I found out my boyfriend can name each and every Pokémon, but can't remember my birthday. FML

#17090156
263 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36130) - you deserved it (8629)

On 07/13/2011 at 2:47am - love - by Ignored - United States (Texas)

Today, my mother told me she wanted me to get an exorcism. Yes, she was serious. I'm Jewish. FML

#16999311
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27377) - you deserved it (3290)

On 07/06/2011 at 11:21am - misc - by anonymous - United States

Today, my girlfriend who was planning on waiting until marriage for sex decided to have sex with me. It's been 4 hours and she hasn't stopped crying, praying and calling me the devil's temptation. FML

#16998038
389 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53491) - you deserved it (16759)

On 07/06/2011 at 7:26am - intimacy - by devilboy - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my mom said we are having a party for the 4th of July. Her definition of a party is my grandma coming over. FML

#16974064
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27585) - you deserved it (3577)

On 07/04/2011 at 3:06pm - misc - by Kate - United States (Illinois)

Today, while arm wrestling with my boyfriend, I had to pretend he beat me. FML

#16947329
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39874) - you deserved it (7177)

On 07/02/2011 at 10:06am - love - by fthislyfe (woman) - United States (Wyoming)

Today, my dad spent a full half hour trying to convince me that Judaism is a race. FML

#16938868
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24012) - you deserved it (5836)

On 07/01/2011 at 6:02pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)



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