madmanmajor

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madmanmajor

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2262
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About madmanmajor : Im a cat. Meow. Bitch

madmanmajor's page activity

Visits<b>Smartdumbblonde</b> - the 03/01/2013 at 5:52pm<b>keepkeep</b> - the 02/26/2013 at 6:35pm<b>ironjawber</b> - the 02/20/2013 at 4:39pm<b>Blue329</b> - the 02/20/2013 at 12:39am<b>Milanxx</b> - the 02/16/2013 at 10:19pm<b>Gwen_99</b> - the 02/15/2013 at 4:09pm<b>Nicole1225</b> - the 02/15/2013 at 3:19pm<b>GabrielleFrance</b> - the 02/15/2013 at 2:40pm<b>B5B0N35</b> - the 02/15/2013 at 2:09am<b>vflores</b> - the 02/13/2013 at 10:25am<b>BFons</b> - the 02/12/2013 at 2:37am<b>StaceeeP</b> - the 02/12/2013 at 12:43am<b>kansah</b> - the 02/11/2013 at 1:42am<b>ICastillo</b> - the 01/10/2013 at 12:35am<b>jazzybaby05</b> - the 12/23/2012 at 1:36pm

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madmanmajor's favorite FMLs

Today, I learned that my boyfriend has narcolepsy when we were having sex and he passed out on top of me. FML

by Anonymous / 10/12/2010 at 1:16am / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, I was watching TV with my grandpa, and he stopped flipping channels on a movie with a hot naked chick getting oiled down. Suddenly the remote landed on my stomach as my mom and grandma walked in. They yelled at me for being a pervert for an hour, while my grandpa sat and chuckled. FML

by Andrew / 09/24/2010 at 6:22am / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got my wisdom teeth taken out. The two male doctors told me they'd give me anesthesia, but when they did, I could still hear them. I heard them talking about my breasts and how flat they were for a 17 year old. FML

by mandy16 / 09/03/2010 at 11:43pm / Health

Today, one of my mum's dinner guests walked in on me and my boyfriend kissing, only to let out a horrified scream. Apparently my mum had introduced my boyfriend as her son, as she is embarrassed of my real brother. FML

by incestastic / 08/14/2010 at 7:23pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I discovered our AOL billing information. Turns out we've been paying for dial-up via automatic bill paying that we thought we cancelled in 2000. $1,800 later, we called to cancel. Customer service congratulated us on being loyal members for over 13 years. FML

by Jay / 08/02/2010 at 1:23pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Money

Today, after getting my appendix taken out, we had to drive over five sets of railroad tracks. Then, my four year old brother decided to punch me in the stomach because, "I took away his mommy for two days." FML

by cduttl1230 / 06/25/2010 at 8:30pm / United States (Idaho) / Love

Today, I wasn't feeling well, so I took my temperature with a thermometer from my sister's bathroom. I later found out that I actually used my sister's rectal thermometer. At least I don't have a fever. FML

by asstomouth / 05/29/2010 at 2:20pm / Health

Today, I started to type up a mass text to tell a decent amount of my friends that I'd just come home to a surprise from my boyfriend. Trying to fix a typo, I accidentally hit send with the text only saying "Guess what?! I just came." FML

by anonymous / 03/14/2010 at 10:49am / United States / Geek

Today, I went to Starbucks to use the bathroom. After I knocked on the door, and turned the handle, this little old lady rips the door open and goes "I WAS TAKING A DUMP. YOU WANNA COME IN AND WIPE MY SHIT? DO YOU?!" and then continued to ask me the same question for five minutes. FML

by bathroomblunder / 03/06/2010 at 9:38pm / Canada (Manitoba) / Miscellaneous

Today, I brought my new girlfriend over to show off to my family when my senile great-grandmother walked into the room wearing nothing but her underpants asking when the Olympics come on. FML

by unfortunate419 / 02/17/2010 at 2:30am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I took a picture of my "privates" on my girlfriends cell phone and set it as her background without her knowing. Minutes later, I heard her mom scream. She has the same phone. FML

by masterzach21 / 01/22/2010 at 1:25am / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy

Today, I almost crashed my car because I was checking out an Old Navy mannequin wearing a bra. FML

by Creepster / 01/13/2010 at 1:31am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting it on in his room. In a sexy voice, I asked him, "What are you thinking right now?" He replied, "I'm thinkin' Arby's." FML

by Anonymous / 01/08/2010 at 10:30pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Intimacy

Today, I left work to find a note on my windshield that read, "I think you're cute," with a phone number written down as well. I got super excited and immediately dialed. The phone was answered by a woman laughing hysterically. It was my Mom. FML

by MarkTheShark / 12/12/2009 at 12:23am / United States (Massachusetts) / Love

Today, I found out that my father asked my best friend to marry him. He's 38 and we're 18. She said yes. FML

by Anonymous / 12/04/2009 at 12:12am / United States (Florida) / Love