maddog

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maddog

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 49468
  • Number of comments : 321
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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maddog's page activity

Visits<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 02/09/2016 at 4:25pm<b>love_that_food</b> - the 01/06/2016 at 11:02pm<b>GeorgiaBea</b> - the 12/28/2015 at 6:33pm<b>mutiplyyou</b> - the 10/29/2015 at 10:07pm<b>BadTat</b> - the 10/24/2015 at 6:20am<b>marvelvsdc</b> - the 10/15/2015 at 11:49pm<b>Hunter_the_Ninja</b> - the 10/02/2015 at 2:41am<b>missadell</b> - the 08/09/2015 at 4:51pm<b>ChilledCheese</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 5:28pm<b>kaiboi702</b> - the 05/07/2015 at 1:54am<b>codyflanders2008</b> - the 02/03/2015 at 1:17am<b>BlondePsycho</b> - the 01/01/2015 at 12:40pm<b>Zach_attack_</b> - the 12/30/2014 at 11:18pm<b>quinny_1024</b> - the 10/09/2014 at 12:18pm<b>yoursmileishawt</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 6:54pm<b>singer0421</b> - the 08/20/2014 at 6:27pm<b>sandormatyi</b> - the 08/01/2014 at 12:40pm<b>Cruzg2017</b> - the 07/25/2014 at 11:28pm

Fucked!<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 02/09/2016 at 10:25pm

maddog's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

maddog's favorite FMLs

Today, I asked my friends what NNAS was code for. They have been using this for about a month. After bothering one of them for a few hours, he finally told me. NNAS stands for Nataly Needs A Shower. I'm Nataly. FML

by Anonymous / 08/18/2009 at 12:38am / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I finished writing the most perfect love letter for this girl at summer school. At the end of the letter I signed: Your secret admirer. Cute, right? Not really. Turns out I was so anxious to finish the letter that I ended up writing my name at the bottom. FML

by footyfallout / 08/16/2009 at 1:17am / Canada (Quebec) / Love

Today, I was planning on asking out a girl I've been really close to for a few months now. I was with her when I got a forward text from my friend. It was from the girl and it said "noooo tell him not to ask me out I don't like him." I got rejected via forward text before I told her how I felt. FML

by Tgreject / 08/16/2009 at 12:33am / United States (Massachusetts) / Love

Today, my wife thought it would be fun to bring in one of her girlfriends for a threesome. Because of the friend, I now know what my wife sounds like when she's having a REAL orgasm. Five years and two kids into our marriage. FML

by onehundredpercenteffed / 08/13/2009 at 9:46pm / United States (Idaho) / Intimacy

Today, I was taking a serious shit when the light bulb burned out. I am terrified of the dark and began wailing and crying. My mom had to pick the lock and get me out. I'm a 17 year old guy and captain of the Varsity football team. My little brother recorded it and plans on showing everyone. FML

by scaredshitless / 08/07/2009 at 12:11am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had a video call with a couple of old friends, but the conversation sort of got boring, so I started mouthing words so they'd think the connection was bad and end the awkwardness. Then, as soon as they hung up the call, I realized I'd left my music on in the background the whole time. FML

by fazzems / 08/06/2009 at 11:10pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boss called me into his office. He had a huge smile on his face, so I assumed I was going to get promoted. He then sat down, and told me that he had been sleeping with my wife for the last three months. He still had a huge smile on his face. FML

by smiletellsall / 08/06/2009 at 7:41pm / United States (California) / Work

Today, while my boyfriend and I were having sex, I had my first orgasm. He thought something was wrong, so he stopped. FML

by Anonymous / 08/06/2009 at 6:46pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, a very good friend of mine said he had a question to ask me. Jokingly, I threw my arms around his neck and said, "Oh yes, yes, a thousand times yes!" When I sat back down, I saw tears in his eyes, and he said, "You've made me the happiest man alive" as he pulled a small box out of his coat. FML

by dundundadumb / 08/06/2009 at 5:25pm / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, after being supportive for nearly a year, my brother finally came out of the closet and introduced the family to his new boyfriend. His new boyfriend happens to be my ex-boyfriend. Guess I know why that didn't work out now. FML

by tryingnottocare / 08/06/2009 at 4:01pm / United Kingdom (Hertford) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went through the car wash my boyfriend works at. When I pulled in, I explained I was Greg's girlfriend and cutely asked if I could get a free car wash. His co-worker looked at me confused and said "Greg said he didn't have a girlfriend", then he looked at me and said "Now I know why". FML

by Anonymous / 08/06/2009 at 3:31pm / United States (New York) / Transportation

Today, it was just too hot. I stripped down and, being home alone, pranced around nude, lip synching and playing air guitar to some music. I was getting really into when I opened my eyes and looked out the window to see an old man with binoculars on his terrace. He wasn't birdwatching. FML

by PeepShow / 08/06/2009 at 2:04am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I walked out to my car to see a broken window, a bunch of stuff missing, egg shells, and a note that read "stop banging my boyfriend". I haven't had anyone in over a year. FML

by gkline09 / 08/06/2009 at 1:28am / United States / Transportation

Today, I was riding my bike to the local grocery store to pick up some supplies for dinner. On the way down, traveling down a hill, I hit a drain with no lid. I went to grab hold of the nearest object to soften my fall. That nearest object was a barbed wire fence. FML

by Lawrence / 08/06/2009 at 12:55am / United States (Florida) / Transportation

Today, I was watching a movie with my new boyfriend. I got tired so I thought it would be cute to fall asleep on him. He woke me up and said "You got me wet" Thinking it was a joke, I said smoothly, "That's what she said" He replied "No really." I looked down, I'd drooled all over his shirt. FML

by drooler / 08/05/2009 at 10:23pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous