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maddiecat

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maddiecat
  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1203
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

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Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”

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Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

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maddiecat's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out that using a certain hand sanitizer as masturbation lube will put you in the hospital and result in having to wear an adult diaper for a week. FML

#15542094
242 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12981) - you deserved it (66993)

On 03/29/2011 at 2:28am - intimacy - by JJMan217 (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I realized that even though I was an honor student throughout school, and considered the golden child who was going to go far in life, all I've accomplished a year after graduation is becoming an unemployed single mother still living with my parents. FML

#15535054
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17779) - you deserved it (25145)

On 03/28/2011 at 7:27pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was going to my prom. My mom knows I want to drink so to prevent me, she made sure I took my prescription medicine before I left. I guess her way of stopping me from drinking is killing myself If I do. FML

#15503138
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13738) - you deserved it (33188)

On 03/26/2011 at 8:26pm - health - by coolkid111 - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend called my vagina "Chewbacca". FML

#15415260
356 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28962) - you deserved it (50929)

On 03/21/2011 at 12:58pm - intimacy - by fffmmll - United Kingdom (Derbyshire)

Today, I called my mom to tell her that I'm coming over for a visit. She answered: 'Why? What do you need? Food? Money? I'm not going to help you! You're a grown woman!' And she hung up. I just found out that I'm pregnant and she was the first person I wanted to share it with. FML

#15411546
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39928) - you deserved it (3955)

On 03/21/2011 at 3:07am - misc - by kelly (woman) - Estonia (Harjumaa)

Today, I was on Facebook, looking at pictures from a party I went to. In most of them, I was sitting on the sofa, my shorts bunched to the side, with half my vajayjay on show. FML

#15381782
319 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18277) - you deserved it (60037)

On 03/19/2011 at 11:43am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, my father came over to my house. I realized there were condoms on the table, so I subtly moved a vase to hide them. He then gave me an unamused look and said "I know you have sex. You've been married for nine years. Grow the fuck up, dumbass." FML

#15356314
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15934) - you deserved it (77885)

On 03/17/2011 at 7:52pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was at Aéropostale with some friends when I noticed a woman glaring at me. When we got to the checkout, the woman still had her eyes on me, so I asked why she was staring. She snapped, "If you had kept your legs closed, you wouldn't be pregnant." I'm not pregnant. FML

#15284565
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36556) - you deserved it (4515)

On 03/12/2011 at 4:11pm - misc - by vlcardenx3 (woman) - United States (West Virginia)

Today, I was texting a girl I like. Every message she sent came ten minutes after I sent her a message. When I told her "I've to go", she responded almost instantly with an "Ok, bye". FML

#15282818
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27847) - you deserved it (8489)

On 03/12/2011 at 9:43am - love - by AuraOfJustice - United States

Today, I got a super short pixie cut. All my boyfriend could do was stare at me, speechless. I thought he was taken aback by how cute it was until he told me that I look exactly like my fifteen year old brother. FML

#15266054
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18891) - you deserved it (17744)

On 03/10/2011 at 7:51pm - misc - by shia -

Today, as I couldn't get the airplane seat buckle to buckle, I faced the fact that I've been in denial about how fat I have become. The people in my row faced it too as I began to sob uncontrollably. FML

#15240526
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16854) - you deserved it (30503)

On 03/08/2011 at 1:25pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I told a cashier I always bullshit with that I was getting a new tattoo. She shook her head and said, "Honey, don't get a tattoo. You'll look like a whore." I already have five. FML

#15232480
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12334) - you deserved it (29592)

On 03/07/2011 at 8:03pm - intimacy - by tatfreak (woman) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, my five year old son decided to move all my stuffed animals I have around the house, into sex positions and massive orgies. What have I been teaching my son lately? FML

#15229654
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11181) - you deserved it (37510)

On 03/07/2011 at 2:04pm - intimacy - by lolzboss - United States (Virginia)

Today, I flipped out when I saw a centipede. I screamed, very loudly and in a very high voice. My girlfriend came into the room, stomped on it, picked it up and threw it in the trashcan. I apologized to her for the scene and all she said was, "I'm used to it." FML

#15228646
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8825) - you deserved it (29135)

On 03/07/2011 at 11:17am - misc - by thenotsomanlyman - United States

Today, my husband told me I was lucky to have someone who would love me no matter what my vagina smelled like. FML

#15215941
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38332) - you deserved it (19983)

On 03/06/2011 at 6:28am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Reserved



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