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Today, I told the man I'm sleeping with I thought my sister was prettier than me. His response: "not significantly." FML
I agree, your life sucks (11583) - you deserved it (19154)
On 02/09/2009 at 1:24pm - misc - by xyz (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)
Today, I changed the C on my report card into a B so that I wouldn't get in trouble with my parents. I spent the entire day perfecting the B's positioning and cut exactly around the edges of the size 10 font and sliced my finger in the process. Turns out, I'm still grounded for getting a B. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12551) - you deserved it (28593)
On 02/08/2009 at 6:50pm - misc - by olivia_stealth (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I spent almost my entire English class turned on thinking that the hot girl next to me was playing footsie with me. That is until she stood up and I realized I had been rubbing my foot on her backpack. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6389) - you deserved it (32237)
On 02/05/2009 at 1:04pm - misc - by Kevin (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I discovered a drawer in my house of chocolates, cookies, and baked goods. When I asked my sister what the drawer was, she told me that my mom thought it would be a good idea to hide the fattening foods from me. My entire family had known about the food drawer except me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20830) - you deserved it (5826)
On 02/05/2009 at 10:24am - health - by Tori (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I bought a jacket with real fur on it. Turns out, i'm allergic and now my ears look like they have herpes on them. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8230) - you deserved it (31872)
On 02/04/2009 at 4:05pm - health - by BritneyFink (woman) - Canada (Quebec)
Today, I was singing to my cat and she reached up and put her paw over my mouth. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15967) - you deserved it (26233)
On 02/04/2009 at 6:23am - animals - by Noname - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I walked in the snow and saw some kid slip. I laughed and felt good about myself. Then I fell. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3737) - you deserved it (54398)
On 02/03/2009 at 5:56pm - misc - by WestboroBC (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I finally got the guts to walk out of class 30 min. early only to find that the back door was locked. As I stood there like an idiot trying to get it open, all 200 people in my class turned to laugh. My professor stared at me. I then walked back to my seat sat down and unpacked. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6048) - you deserved it (22788)
On 02/03/2009 at 10:25am - misc - by baller12 (man) - United States (California)
Today, my boss caught me playing games on the computer for 4 hours. My boss told me to feel free and continue, but to pack my stuff up and leave when I was done. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3850) - you deserved it (48108)
On 02/03/2009 at 3:46am - work - by poisonhand (man) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I released a noxious, unforgiving fart in my cubicle not thinking anything of it. You know, one of those sulfurous clouds you get the morning after a few good beers. Moments later, my manager walks in to talk about work. It's 7:30 in the morning, no one else is around. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6192) - you deserved it (16013)
On 02/03/2009 at 1:42am - work - by BillLumberg (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I woke from last night after meeting the most amazing man, and after giving him a good morning kiss, roll out of bed to use his bathroom. After using his toothbrush, I go to replace it in his holder only to find not one, but several prescriptions for herpes in his unzipped toiletry bag. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14681) - you deserved it (27391)
On 02/02/2009 at 8:42pm - love - by screwed. - United States (District of Columbia)
Today, my boyfriend asked me to go to a car show. I told him to hold on, I had to ask my mom. I quietly asked her to say no for me. She said "Sure!". FML
I agree, your life sucks (5303) - you deserved it (22511)
On 01/31/2009 at 6:25pm - love - by oicwydt - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I had sex with a guy. As he was sleeping next to me, I checked his facebook messages and saw that he sent a message to one of his buddies asking what kind of lotion helps get rid of crabs. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14604) - you deserved it (47920)
On 01/31/2009 at 10:04am - intimacy - by DDD - Sent from mobile version
Today, I woke up with the worst hangover of my life. My best friend comes over and informs me that I had sex with my girlfriend's two best friends last night. Awesome! Then I realized her best friends are guys. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7161) - you deserved it (14955)
On 01/31/2009 at 9:43am - intimacy - by Ah hell - United States (Ohio)
Today, I put on my favorite booty shorts and walked outside to smoke a cigarette. My dog had chewed a hole in the middle of my shorts, and I was standing on a balcony that's located on the busiest street in town. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4553) - you deserved it (16830)
On 01/30/2009 at 11:08pm - animals - by ThatsNotRight - United States (Hawaii)
Monday 17 June 2013
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