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maddiecat

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maddiecat

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  • Number of visits : 8284
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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maddiecat's page activity

Visits<b>cdncw</b> - the 05/13/2015 at 1:17pm<b>SandpitNinja</b> - the 10/08/2014 at 11:25pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 09/21/2014 at 10:23am<b>EmmaMK</b> - the 05/05/2014 at 8:42am<b>riptor911</b> - the 04/11/2014 at 2:07am<b>NotGabe</b> - the 04/07/2014 at 10:37pm<b>cnparks1990</b> - the 04/07/2014 at 6:22pm

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You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

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maddiecat's favorite FMLs

Today, I was playing Charades. My boyfriend, who I'd recently had a fight with, had trouble and just said his answer was the name of my celebrity twin. Nobody got it. He said "Really? It's Fat Bastard." Stunned silence followed, broken by a single "HAH." from my 'best friend'. FML

#21340816
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29536) - you deserved it (3398)

On 01/20/2015 at 6:04am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I sat my son down for the sex talk. By the time it was over, he'd corrected me on several factual errors and told me what felching is. Now I remember why I never wanted kids. FML

#21340142
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31270) - you deserved it (6436)

On 01/19/2015 at 9:34am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Maine)

Today, my wife wanted me to take her to a new restaurant in town. When I looked it up and saw their prices, I almost had a heart attack. When I said it was too expensive, she snapped "Maybe you'd like to look up 'Lorena Bobbitt' next?!" We went to the restaurant. FML

#21338935
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29871) - you deserved it (6247)

On 01/17/2015 at 1:49pm - love - by wounded pride, intact cock (man) - United States

Today, I realized that while I've been the same minuscule height for the past five years, my feet won't stop growing. I'm 5 foot and a size 12. I look like a clown. FML

#21338417
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28494) - you deserved it (5767)

On 01/16/2015 at 5:15pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I learned that when a man in the row in front of you at a movie theater tells you to shut up, you shouldn't tell him to fuck off. He might be 6'4 with a short temper. FML

#21337906
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13874) - you deserved it (44563)

On 01/15/2015 at 10:15pm - misc - by whoops.. (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I had lunch with my parents. I'm an Asian guy who married a Puerto Rican woman and we just had a boy. My dad looks at my son, then looks at me and says, "You ruined the bloodline." FML

Today, my husband bought me XL pajamas for my birthday. I got really angry, telling him that's obviously not my size. I tried them on just to show him how ridiculous they look. They fit. FML

#21336954
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21262) - you deserved it (36909)

On 01/14/2015 at 12:49pm - love - by middleagednurse - United States (Florida)

Today, a girl from class screamed at me in public for hugging the guy she likes. She threatened to take me out if I didn't "back off". That guy is my boyfriend. FML

#21333251
112 comments

Today, the dry skin on my feet has gotten so bad that my boyfriend uses my feet to itch his legs when we're cuddling. FML

Today, my vegetarian girlfriend put some ghost pepper hot sauce on my steak to teach me a "lesson" about eating meat. FML

#21330517
257 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37237) - you deserved it (5275)

On 01/04/2015 at 5:27am - love - by Anonymous - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I dragged my grill outside in the freezing cold to cook a steak for New Year's day. I left my spatula in the garage, and I set the still-wrapped steak on the grill. I was only gone 45 seconds, but that was long enough for my cat to open the wrapper and run off with my steak in his jaws. FML

#21328958
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26521) - you deserved it (6273)

On 01/01/2015 at 10:18pm - animals - by TaddM21 (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I got a gift-wrapped package in the mail from my racist mother-in-law. She's always hated me, so I thought it was a bit strange. Inside was a squirt gun and a note telling me to take my "black ass" for a walk around a police station with it, followed with a smiley face. FML

#21325871
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40399) - you deserved it (2993)

On 12/28/2014 at 1:41pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my parents refused to give my daughter her Christmas presents as an act of revenge against her father. FML

#21323347
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28900) - you deserved it (2113)

On 12/24/2014 at 3:02pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my ex called, saying she's 3 months pregnant. She seems to have forgotten that we haven't been in the same room, much less friends, in over a year. My dimwitted wife thinks the baby is mine. FML

#21322698
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38815) - you deserved it (4275)

On 12/23/2014 at 1:32pm - love - by both are dimwitted - United States (California)

Today, I was yelled at in public for staring at a guy in a wheelchair. I was staring 'cause he was so good looking. FML

#21322556
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34226) - you deserved it (4268)

On 12/23/2014 at 6:28am - misc - by anonymous - Austria (Wien)



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