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maddiecat

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maddiecat

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  • Number of visits : 2629
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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maddiecat's page activity

Visits<b>EmmaMK</b> - the 05/05/2014 at 8:42am<b>riptor911</b> - the 04/11/2014 at 2:07am<b>NotGabe</b> - the 04/07/2014 at 10:37pm<b>cnparks1990</b> - the 04/07/2014 at 6:22pm

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maddiecat's favorite FMLs

Today, in a waiting room, my 4-year-old daughter told me she saw two guys kissing. I quietly explained that some men like men, they're gay, and normal like everyone else. I was pleased with myself until the woman across from me scoffed and muttered, "Disgusting." FML

#21138395
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48720) - you deserved it (7454)

On 05/13/2014 at 1:42am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Nevada)

Today, I nervously flirted with a very cute guy. Being a little overweight, I rarely think cute guys will go for me. This line of thinking was yet again correct when he casually pulled his sleeve up revealing a tattoo of a pinup girl with a "NO FAT CHICKS" sign below it. FML

#21138042
359 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55049) - you deserved it (7043)

On 05/12/2014 at 7:49pm - love - by nofatchicks (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my daughter was scared to go to the bathroom because she thought there was a person behind the shower curtain. There actually was a person behind the shower curtain. FML

#21137389
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58677) - you deserved it (5030)

On 05/12/2014 at 1:17am - kids - by kids -

Today, my dad seemed moody, so to lift his spirits, I told him I love him. He just snorted, "You gay or something, boy?" Really mature, dad, really mature. FML

#21136683
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40587) - you deserved it (4877)

On 05/11/2014 at 1:57pm - love - by not gay in AL (man) - United States

Today, a customer cussed me out for hiding behind the counter a jacket she's been "eyeing since it came out". She loudly exclaimed that she was going to report me to my manager and get me "fired." It was my personal jacket that we don't even sell. FML

Today, I went on a date for the first time since my divorce was finalized a year ago. The first question the guy asked me was what my favorite sex position is. FML

#21135207
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46060) - you deserved it (5488)

On 05/09/2014 at 10:37pm - intimacy - by CEO - United States (Virginia)

Today, I got a ticket for parking in front of a private driveway. My own driveway. FML

#21135152
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42410) - you deserved it (5007)

On 05/09/2014 at 9:39pm - money - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I overheard someone at the mall telling his friend, "So I'm going in for a brain scan." Trying to be funny, I piped up, "Better hope they find something!" Turns out that had been the end of his sentence, and the scan is to see if his cancer has spread. FML

#21134153
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16503) - you deserved it (67159)

On 05/08/2014 at 3:52pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was trolling on a My Little Pony forum. I was midway through typing a big post, calling them all a bunch of attention-seeking losers who act like morons because their parents never loved them, when I broke down in tears, realizing I'd just perfectly described myself. FML

#21133397
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20492) - you deserved it (55553)

On 05/07/2014 at 5:25pm - misc - by I suck :( (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my friend sent me a link to a "horrible" tattoo that he found online, that a guy had gotten at my tattoo parlor. FML

#21133162
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35477) - you deserved it (8908)

On 05/07/2014 at 10:55am - misc - by Bad Artist - United States

Today, to teach my 14-year-old son a serious lesson for bullying a child at school again, I grounded him for the rest of the year. He just snorted and said, "Cool, I'll just jack off all year then! Thanks, mum!" and happily retreated to his bedroom. FML

#21132433
247 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42677) - you deserved it (8183)

On 05/06/2014 at 2:38pm - kids - by Satan's Mum (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I met this overweight chick and ended up sleeping with her. We were doing it doggy style and it was great until she said, "Milk me like a cow." I can no longer drink milk without hearing that in my head. FML

#21132249
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49045) - you deserved it (18045)

On 05/06/2014 at 9:55am - intimacy - by chumman (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I once again had another guy's sweaty crotch pushed into my face. I still don't see why I enjoy wrestling. FML

Today, I read that egg whites make a good hair treatment. Everything was going fine until, without thinking, I turned the hot water on to wash it out. I'm still picking the cooked egg out of my hair. FML

#21129302
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24597) - you deserved it (32287)

On 05/03/2014 at 12:57am - misc - by EggHead - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I read that egg whites make a good hair treatment. Everything was going fine until, without thinking, I turned the hot water on to wash it out. I'm still picking the cooked egg out of my hair. FML

#21129302
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24597) - you deserved it (32287)

On 05/03/2014 at 12:57am - misc - by EggHead - Canada (Ontario)



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