Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

maddiecat

Online | Search for a member

maddiecat

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 8809
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

maddiecat's page activity

Visits<b>cdncw</b> - the 05/13/2015 at 1:17pm<b>SandpitNinja</b> - the 10/08/2014 at 11:25pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 09/21/2014 at 10:23am<b>EmmaMK</b> - the 05/05/2014 at 8:42am<b>riptor911</b> - the 04/11/2014 at 2:07am<b>NotGabe</b> - the 04/07/2014 at 10:37pm<b>cnparks1990</b> - the 04/07/2014 at 6:22pm

maddiecat's FML badges

I NEED to know!

You went as far as reading the terms of use. You’re a total FML completist.

Keen reader – Level: godlike ninja

You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

See all of maddiecat's badges

maddiecat's favorite FMLs

Today, my mother asked me how pasta is harvested. She actually thought it grew out of the ground. FML

#21408925
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26836) - you deserved it (2164)

On 05/12/2015 at 12:37pm - misc - by a - United Kingdom (Windsor and Maidenhead)

Today, I wore a pair of shorts a size too big while doing laundry. When I ordered a pizza afterwards and answered the door, I realized I looked a little heavy, so I sucked in my stomach. My shorts fell to the ground in front of the delivery guy. FML

#21408368
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26691) - you deserved it (8717)

On 05/11/2015 at 12:40pm - misc - by oops (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I made my mom cookies for Mother's Day. My brother took all the cookies to work as a snack, because I didn't specifically tell him that the homemade "MOM" hearts weren't meant for him. FML

#21408187
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27926) - you deserved it (2118)

On 05/11/2015 at 12:23am - love - by CryoSpectre - United States (California)

Today, I had to play the hot and cold game with my boyfriend until he found my clitoris. FML

#21405064
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34558) - you deserved it (4520)

On 05/05/2015 at 11:13am - intimacy - by baby_trex_arms - United States (California)

Today, at my job in a gas station, a customer who had previously driven off without paying came in to shout abuse at me because I had said in the police statement, "He looks about 60." He is apparently 55. He didn't come in to pay, he came in to swear at me. FML

#21404993
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29831) - you deserved it (1846)

On 05/05/2015 at 6:50am - work - by GotGasNotLuck (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I desperately needed to let off some steam at work, so I went outside and screamed obscenities at the top of my lungs, before heading back inside. The police then showed up to investigate complaints of a "raving lunatic" in the area. FML

#21403035
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19136) - you deserved it (21918)

On 05/01/2015 at 6:17pm - work - by RavingLunatic (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, after a 2 month relationship, I realized two things: A) Dating a known psycho because "crazy chicks are great in bed" is a dumb idea, and B) What crazy chicks are actually great at is beating the crap out of you and driving you to alcoholism. FML

#21402940
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14206) - you deserved it (29092)

On 05/01/2015 at 3:26pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) -

Today, my boyfriend of 3 years broke up with me, all because he thought I was a communist, a sinner, and a terrorist, simply because I think the gay rights are OK, because I agree with some feminists, and because I got blonde highlights in my hair. FML

#21402099
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31892) - you deserved it (5439)

On 04/29/2015 at 11:31pm - love - by Confusedblonde - United States (Ohio)

Today, my mom told me that if I wanted to commit suicide, I should make it seem like a car accident, and not do it in the house, because she would be too embarrassed if people thought she was a bad parent. FML

#21401085
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37170) - you deserved it (2805)

On 04/28/2015 at 9:26am - misc - by WasNotAdopted (man) - United States (California)

Today, while with a large group of friends, my best friend started talking about my struggles with dating and intimacy. I quietly asked her to stop talking about it, as it was personal and I wasn't comfortable with everyone else knowing. Her response? "Um, it's really none of your business." FML

Today, my mother-in-law asked me when my fiancé and I were going to start having children. When I told her we weren't planning on having any, she went on a tirade about how selfish and cold I am for denying her precious grandchildren. Now she hates me. FML

#21397047
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27584) - you deserved it (3889)

On 04/20/2015 at 7:55pm - kids - by ChildFree (woman) - Saudi Arabia (Ar Riyad)

Today, I received several pairs of panties in the mail that I'd ordered online. When I opened the box, I was shocked because every pair was basically huge granny-panties. I was sure none would fit properly, but I tried them on to be sure. They fit perfectly. FML

#21396824
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28004) - you deserved it (6863)

On 04/20/2015 at 1:01pm - love - by fatass - United States (Nebraska)

Today, my exchange student asked me for a ride to a party at a friend's house that I didn't know about. When I said, "Oh, just let me change", she replied, "I just need the ride, you're not invited." FML

#21396492
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31139) - you deserved it (2882)

On 04/19/2015 at 9:46pm - misc - by me - Canada

Today, while studying for an exam, the neighbor's chihuahua started barking outside. After a few seconds, my mom yelled out for me to stop laughing. She honestly thought the barking was my laughter. FML

#21396226
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29203) - you deserved it (2898)

On 04/19/2015 at 1:09pm - animals - by woof? (woman) - United States (California)



FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie replies #1
  • Hello all you crybabies, from Land's End to John o' Groats. Yes, I'm finally here my lovelies. Since last week, my inbox hasn't stopped humming with the noise of new mail dropping into it, letters full…

Friday 31 July 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: