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maddiecat

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maddiecat

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
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  • Number of visits : 11791
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

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maddiecat's page activity

Visits<b>cdncw</b> - the 05/13/2015 at 1:17pm<b>SandpitNinja</b> - the 10/08/2014 at 11:25pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 09/21/2014 at 10:23am<b>EmmaMK</b> - the 05/05/2014 at 8:42am<b>riptor911</b> - the 04/11/2014 at 2:07am<b>NotGabe</b> - the 04/07/2014 at 10:37pm<b>cnparks1990</b> - the 04/07/2014 at 6:22pm

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You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

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maddiecat's favorite FMLs

Today, while babysitting, I made the kids and myself peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. When their parents came home, their dad took out the same container of peanut butter I had used and let their dog lick out of it. FML

#21462597
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22881) - you deserved it (1859)

On 08/30/2015 at 2:44pm - animals - by anon - United States

Today, my brother said he was cleaning his room. When I walked in, he was giving my cousin a blowjob. FML

#21462259
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29816) - you deserved it (2773)

On 08/29/2015 at 7:01pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (West Virginia)

Today, the professor I've had a crush on informed me that there's only one way left I could still pass his course. Thinking this was an attempt to flirt with me, I told him I'd do anything he could imagine. He then looked confused when he asked me to write an essay. FML

#21458908
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10616) - you deserved it (31421)

On 08/21/2015 at 3:43pm - misc - by notwhatithought (woman) - Germany (Bayern)

Today, I turned in an essay about a book I'd read over the summer. My teacher later called me to her desk and began to gush about how interesting the book sounded and asked to borrow my copy. The book I wrote about is not real, and the main characters are named after my childhood pets. FML

#21458720
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21640) - you deserved it (16145)

On 08/21/2015 at 1:15am - misc - by technicallywroteabook (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend surprised me by offering me a foot massage to ease my sore feet after a run. I asked for a lot of pressure. Now I'm back home in a walking boot after being diagnosed with a fractured fifth metatarsal bone. FML

#21458628
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22040) - you deserved it (5042)

On 08/20/2015 at 9:42pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my husband and I told my parents that I finally managed to conceive. My mom burst into tears of joy and said how great it was that she's finally going to be a "real" grandma, all within earshot of our adopted and now-devastated daughter. FML

#21457997
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36947) - you deserved it (1982)

On 08/19/2015 at 11:00am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - South Africa

Today, I took the lid off my slow cooker to serve up a casserole that had been 12 hours in the making. A cockroach took the opportunity to dive in. My husband and I are now eating toast, while the delicious smell of casserole taunts us from the trash. FML

Today, my parents told me they were getting divorced, at the beginning of a family road trip, adding that this'll be the last thing we ever do as a family. FML

#21453738
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28051) - you deserved it (1548)

On 08/09/2015 at 2:27am - misc - by jordan.marie97 - Australia

Today, the jackoffs at my new job kept making jokes about my prosthetic leg. When I finally lost my shit and told one of them to back off, he said "Woah there, Mr Pistorius!" then said he'll avoid using the restroom now in case I decide to shoot him through the door. FML

#21453154
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28281) - you deserved it (1770)

On 08/07/2015 at 1:31pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, at work, I saw a lady leave her infant in a display crib so she could go shopping. When I stopped her and told her she couldn't do that, she said, "Well, I do it all the time". FML

#21450242
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27637) - you deserved it (1889)

On 07/31/2015 at 11:30pm - kids - by Oihana - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I went to a garden party my friend had invited me to. I soon discovered they had seriously downplayed the formality of the event, as I noticed trays of fancy hors d'oeuvres and glasses of champagne lined up on the table. I showed up with Kool Aid and Ritz crackers. FML

#21448484
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25560) - you deserved it (3623)

On 07/28/2015 at 8:22am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Slough)

Today, I'm grieving over the death of my best friend of 9 years. My mom wasted no time arriving at the conclusion that I must be hormonal and pregnant with his child. Apparently it's not normal for a woman to cry so much over a man, unless they've been fucking. FML

#21446500
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31108) - you deserved it (1826)

On 07/24/2015 at 12:05pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, my boyfriend's dad helped me put coolant in my car. When I said I wished I could do something in return, he told me to get an abortion so I wouldn't "ruin" his son's life. When I told my boyfriend, he didn't believe me. FML

#21444969
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27707) - you deserved it (2575)

On 07/21/2015 at 11:17am - misc - by father-in-nope (woman) - United States (California)

Today, after hours of waiting in line, I finally met my favorite band. After posing for a picture, I looked at my phone to find that instead of taking a picture with me and the band, my friend took selfies. FML

Today, I was fired from my dream job for being pregnant. Apparently, you can't teach children while growing one inside you. FML

#21444439
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32991) - you deserved it (2340)

On 07/20/2015 at 10:29am - work - by mrsmahdi - United States (California)



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