maddiecat

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maddiecat

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 13659
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

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maddiecat's page activity

Visits<b>RiftenGuard</b> - the 04/21/2016 at 8:42pm<b>cdncw</b> - the 05/13/2015 at 1:17pm<b>SandpitNinja</b> - the 10/08/2014 at 11:25pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 09/21/2014 at 10:23am<b>EmmaMK</b> - the 05/05/2014 at 8:42am<b>riptor911</b> - the 04/11/2014 at 2:07am<b>NotGabe</b> - the 04/07/2014 at 10:37pm<b>cnparks1990</b> - the 04/07/2014 at 6:22pm

maddiecat's FML badges

I NEED to know!

You went as far as reading the terms of use. You’re a total FML completist.

Keen reader – Level: godlike ninja

You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

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maddiecat's favorite FMLs

Today, after a DNA test and getting his sperm count checked, my husband still doesn't believe our son is his. He was kicked in the nuts several times as a child, something he believes has rendered him infertile. FML

by ifunnybatman / 03/22/2016 at 12:03am / United States (Georgia) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, while at work I got a complaint from a guest. She complained that after spending 2 hours to get her hair done for a wedding, she got drenched with water from a child. I work at a WATER PARK. Thank you for calling me a pathetic asshat for no reason in front of other guests. FML

by Anonymous / 03/20/2016 at 6:46pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, I went into a store for an interview. I've had several places wanting to talk to me and this job was a lot lower paying. I got a little cocky and when offered the job, I said I wanted some time to finish my other interviews first and see what my options were. The manager then took back his offer. FML

by Jeanna / 03/15/2016 at 7:14pm / United States (Kentucky) / Work

Today, an attention seeking weirdo who thinks she's my friend asked me who was going to be the maid of honour at my wedding. Knowing what she was really asking, I said I just want a small, non-fancy wedding with no bridesmaids. She broke down into a sobbing mess in front of me. FML

by Anonymous / 03/12/2016 at 6:13am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Miscellaneous

Today, I learned that not only am I pregnant, I'm too far along for an abortion. My husband and I originally bonded over the fact that we both hate children. FML

by wellthisisbad / 02/29/2016 at 7:27am / United States (Florida) / Kids

Today, I learned that not only am I pregnant, I'm too far along for an abortion. My husband and I originally bonded over the fact that we both hate children. FML

by wellthisisbad / 02/29/2016 at 7:27am / United States (Florida) / Kids

Today, I had to pee in a cup. The cup almost overflowed. My first instinct was to drink some so it didn't spill. FML

by killme / 02/29/2016 at 2:00am / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I had to pee in a cup. The cup almost overflowed. My first instinct was to drink some so it didn't spill. FML

by killme / 02/29/2016 at 2:00am / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I let my estranged husband move back in with my son and me. Later, his pregnant and underage girlfriend knocked on my door, crying about how her mom kicked her out. I'm such a pushover, they're in my bed and I'm on the couch. FML

by ishyboo / 02/27/2016 at 5:59pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Love

Today, I went to my stepdad's funeral. He was the most important person in my life, but it didn't stop my stepsister angrily saying, "Why are you crying? He wasn't even your real dad." FML

by Anonymous / 02/24/2016 at 10:05am / Miscellaneous

Today, the girl who likes me incredibly much asked me if she could come for a ride with me on my motorcycle. Normally this isn't a problem as I take lots of people out for rides for fun, but this time I had no choice but to tell her she couldn't because she's just too heavy for it. FML

by BikerGuy / 02/24/2016 at 1:31am / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous

Today, I gave my boyfriend a $300 cooler for Valentine's Day. When I asked what he got me, he pointed at my stomach. I'm 3 months pregnant with his baby. FML

by woahlaura / 02/14/2016 at 11:26am / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, my girlfriend lost one of her rings. I found this out as I overheard her gushing to her friend about how I must have borrowed it to find out what her ring size is. I have zero interest whatsoever in the sick and utterly immoral institution of marriage. FML

by ALL PRAISE TO THE NIGHT MOTHER / 01/29/2016 at 4:19pm / United States (New York) / Love

Today, my boyfriend moved in with me. I just walked into my kitchen to find my thirty year-old, perfectly seasoned cast iron skillet completely submerged in soapy water in the sink, presumably from last night when he washed the dishes. FML

by miss_strauss / 01/25/2016 at 1:21pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was told that if I was caught yawning again, I'd be fired. FML

by Anonymous / 01/19/2016 at 6:36pm / Canada (Alberta) / Work