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maceee_armstrong

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maceee_armstrong

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Saturday 17 October 1992 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1206
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 18 posted

About maceee_armstrong : I'm Macy. I'm 19, and I live in Memphis. I LOVE sports..basketball and football are my faves. My favorite movies are Saving private Ryan, gangs of new york, and fight club. I love to cook also. I paint and sing. I'm pretty cool I think...I'm real. Hit me up.(:

maceee_armstrong's page activity

Visits<b>Ssandro</b> - the 01/24/2014 at 1:02am<b>RevengeIsSweet</b> - the 01/15/2013 at 7:21pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:53pm<b>ncbeach22</b> - the 05/10/2011 at 2:01pm

maceee_armstrong's FML badges

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of maceee_armstrong's badges

maceee_armstrong's favorite FMLs

Today, I returned home to my parents' house, drunk. Hungry, I grabbed a slice of bread and some butter and took two mouthfuls. Five hours later, my mother woke me up and dragged me to the kitchen. In the middle of the table was a buttered, half-eaten sponge. FML

#19959363
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10698) - you deserved it (36795)

On 07/19/2012 at 2:55pm - misc - by Bontempi (man) - France

Today, my boyfriend picked me up and spun me around like they do in the movies, but not before grimacing, taking a deep breath, and muttering "one, two, three... and... uuuppp!" FML

#19946239
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19121) - you deserved it (5043)

On 07/16/2012 at 4:51pm - misc - by dogmom (woman) - United States (Hawaii)

Today, my dad sat me down for a talk. After the talk, he wasn't my dad anymore. FML

#19942597
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39659) - you deserved it (1836)

On 07/15/2012 at 8:12pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got into a debate with my boyfriend over whether or not oral sex was considered sex. I stood firm that it was not. Apparently, he took this as permission, as later that night I walked in on him not having sex with my sister. FML

#19939596
353 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34054) - you deserved it (39473)

On 07/15/2012 at 1:34am - intimacy - by oops - United States

Today, an old guy approached me and asked if I had ever seen an elephant with white ears. I shook my head. He then pulled the pockets out of his shorts and whipped out his sex nose. FML

#19926709
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32612) - you deserved it (4116)

On 07/12/2012 at 2:40am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my wife is giving birth to our first born. I am an officer stationed overseas. Apparently, I am not only missing the birth, but I also missed the conception. FML

#19911168
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55258) - you deserved it (2456)

On 07/08/2012 at 8:30pm - love - by moodyreallyrocks - United States (Kentucky)

Today, while looking through pictures of my boyfriend and me on Facebook, I noticed that in practically every single one featuring my best friend, his eyes are directed down her shirt. FML

#19905936
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24999) - you deserved it (3345)

On 07/07/2012 at 6:00pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I packed all my clothes in a black garbage bag, so I could easily move them to my new house. When I came back outside to load it into my car, the bag was missing, and all I could see was a garbage truck driving away with the week's trash. FML

#19905644
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12012) - you deserved it (26042)

On 07/07/2012 at 4:23pm - misc - by Ali - United States (Hawaii)

Today, my waiter turned to me and asked, "Let me guess, Miss I'm-not-fat-I'm-fluffy wants a diet coke?" FML

#19895683
342 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36139) - you deserved it (9027)

On 07/05/2012 at 3:10pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend and sister fooling around in the shower together. Supposedly, she was sleepwalking, and he was trying to wake her up. FML

#19890528
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42167) - you deserved it (2774)

On 07/04/2012 at 12:40pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Prince Edward Island)

Today, I went to the beach with my boyfriend and family. My sister coyly pointed out the scratch marks down his back, hoping to embarrass me in front of my parents. The marks weren't from me. FML

#19873995
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28133) - you deserved it (1916)

On 07/01/2012 at 12:22am - love - by Anonymous (woman) -

Today, I have four flights. I spent last night projectile vomiting with food poisoning. By the time I got to the airport it had progressed to liquid diarhea. Two flights in, I got my period. FML

#19870672
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49695) - you deserved it (2270)

On 06/30/2012 at 8:48am - health - by Jobby (woman) -

Today, I was going through a hard and painful break up after a long relationship. Trying to get over it, I invited my two best friends over to lift my spirits. The night ended with them making out on my bed as I sat alone in the other room. FML

#19869776
25 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22738) - you deserved it (2047)

On 06/30/2012 at 2:26am - love - by anonymous - United States (Colorado)

Today, I found out just how easy it is to be launched against the wall and sucker-punched into oblivion by a 200-pound former Marine turned professional body-builder. I discovered this after I told my fiancée's dad that we were expecting a baby. FML

#19867923
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25110) - you deserved it (4170)

On 06/29/2012 at 7:57pm - health - by fuckjuggalos (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was entering a guy's number into my phone, and I couldn't remember his name. Embarrassed, I tried to be sneaky and asked, "Can you spell your name for me, please?" His name is Bob. FML

#19861298
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8915) - you deserved it (26106) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 06/28/2012 at 3:58pm - misc - by Bernadette (woman) -



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