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m3talc0re

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m3talc0re
  • Town/Country : queens, NYC
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 226
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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m3talc0re's favorite FMLs

Today, due to my short temper, I punched myself in the nose because I wouldn't stop sneezing. FML

#21116112
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17067) - you deserved it (42517)

On 04/18/2014 at 7:09am - health - by Ow (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I lied to the cashier at my local store, saying that I was "nominated to buy the candy for the party" when in actuality I went home and gorged on it alone. FML

#21116013
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30137) - you deserved it (9273)

On 04/18/2014 at 1:37am - misc - by Fatass - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I went to a restaurant for a friend's birthday. There were two very attractive waiters. They waited until I went to the toilet to sit down, talk to my friends and hit on them. They promptly left upon my return. Men avoid me. FML

Today, one of my most problematic students remained after class, whence he strongly insinuated his interest in receiving oral sex; I tried to convey just how inappropriate that was, when he interrupted, "Look, will you at least touch it?" FML

#21114779
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40210) - you deserved it (3493)

On 04/16/2014 at 6:03pm - intimacy - by MILF (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my 12-year-old sister watched Frozen. She's spent the last two hours playing the song Let It Go on high volume over and over, and in different languages. I now have a skull-splitting headache, and my dad just sarcastically told me to "let it go". FML

#21113787
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39529) - you deserved it (5022)

On 04/15/2014 at 3:24pm - kids - by fuckyouharddad - United States (California)

Today, my house was robbed. My two 70-pound German Shepherds obeyed me when I told them to attack. They also obeyed the robber when he said, "Sit". FML

#21113538
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45087) - you deserved it (3935)

On 04/15/2014 at 8:08am - animals - by stupiddog (man) - United States (California)

Today, I decided to go to a therapy group to help with my anxiety and to meet people who felt similar. I joked with my friend that no one would turn up as people might feel anxious about going. I was right. I was the only one there. FML

#21113050
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33472) - you deserved it (2905)

On 04/14/2014 at 7:34pm - misc - by all by myself (woman) - Ireland (Cork)

Today, my boyfriend turned down a job that would have more than doubled his income because he didn't want to upset his current boss by quitting. FML

Today, after a dental appointment, my lips were numb. On the bus on my way back home, the cutest girl smiled at me. In attempt to smile back, I forgot my lips were numb and ended up spitting my chewing gum at her. I had to switch buses. FML

#21112602
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38808) - you deserved it (4681)

On 04/14/2014 at 6:12am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Malta

Today, my mother thought it would be funny to sneak into my room at night and scream like a demon after I had explained to her how scared I was of the exorcist movie I had just seen. She claims it wasn't her. FML

#21054343
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40113) - you deserved it (5235)

On 02/08/2014 at 12:13pm - misc - by so scared - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I check my phone regularly for calls or texts from her. I take her out to eat frequently, and we sleep in the same bed sometimes. Today I realized the closest thing I have to a boyfriend is my grandma. FML

#21054270
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35626) - you deserved it (5943)

On 02/08/2014 at 10:12am - misc - by grandma - United States (Georgia)

Today, my dogs freaked out and started getting violent because they thought the sound of my vibrator was the other's growling. FML

#21048300
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38998) - you deserved it (9482)

On 02/02/2014 at 4:50pm - animals - by foops (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I was singing in the shower but couldn't hit the higher notes. My wife complained and 2 minutes later she ran a tap causing my shower to go freezing. I shrieked. My wife said my pitch was still wrong. FML

#21048056
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37976) - you deserved it (7516)

On 02/02/2014 at 11:53am - misc - by deargodthepain (man) - United States

Today, my mom announced to everyone that she wants at least ten grandchildren. I'm an only child. FML



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Friday 18 April 2014

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