Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

m16agent

Search for a member

m16agent

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 324
  • Number of comments : 7
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

m16agent's page activity

Visits<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 10:00pm

m16agent's FML badges

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

m16agent's favorite FMLs

Today, I was cleaning the windows at work and a guy walked in so I opened the door for him. After I opened the door, he stood there with his eyes closed and his arms open. I thought he wanted a hug so I hugged him. Apparently he wanted me to spray him with Windex. FML

#19409952
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20578) - you deserved it (2926)

On 04/05/2012 at 12:13am - work - by Kait - United States

Today, my friend and I walked 3 miles to a Starbucks. We went inside, paid for our coffees and walked the 3 miles back to my house. We forgot to pick up our coffees. FML

#19216079
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8397) - you deserved it (42000)

On 03/04/2012 at 7:27pm - money - by stuff2710 - United States (Illinois)

Today, I punched myself in the face while trying to eat a GoGurt. FML

#18112620
309 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23883) - you deserved it (15488)

On 10/30/2011 at 4:15pm - misc - by yum yogurt - United States (Kentucky)

Today, we were playing dodgeball at school. I tried to duck and jump around so the idiots on the other team couldn't nail me with the ball. Mid-jump, it tore through the air and smashed straight into my ballsack, sending me curling into a fetal position on the floor. I feel like I got sterilized. FML

#18098889
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23379) - you deserved it (9978)

On 10/28/2011 at 8:44pm - misc - by ricksterile - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was at my girlfriend's house. I really had to use the bathroom, but decided to wait. After about an hour, I went to the restroom. I pissed for so long that when I walked out her family all started clapping. FML

#17954920
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28040) - you deserved it (6111)

On 10/10/2011 at 8:58pm - health - by maniac11 - United States (Texas)

Today, I heard on a TV show that it's possible to fit a standard light-bulb in your mouth, but it can't be removed afterwards. I just had to try this out. And then visit the local hospital to get it removed. FML

#17695095
298 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8439) - you deserved it (63400)

On 09/08/2011 at 6:00am - health - by Stuck (man) - United States

Today, my neighbor declared his love for me via "the medium of interpretative dance." FML

#17641775
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27604) - you deserved it (3003)

On 09/02/2011 at 2:54am - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, while playing with bubble wrap, I dislocated my thumb. FML

#17628790
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24243) - you deserved it (13701)

On 08/31/2011 at 10:02am - health - by Bigpoppa0507 - Canada

Today, I walked into my shed to find my daughter's boyfriend asleep and completely duct-taped to the ceiling, with his face painted like a clown. FML

#17628781
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32141) - you deserved it (3069)

On 08/31/2011 at 10:00am - kids - by piece of shed - United States (New York)

Today, I visited my son at work. He's an interpreter for the government. As I watched him converse with a group of men, I was overcome with pride. Then the woman next to me said "I can't believe they're talking about that in public." They were discussing masturbation techniques. FML

#17625902
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32394) - you deserved it (3525)

On 08/30/2011 at 11:30pm - intimacy - by mystupidson (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I played a Jazz gig. It rained, making the tent the band performed under heavy with water. When I stepped forward to play my solo, the front end of the tent collapsed under the weight of the rain, drenching me. FML

#17617354
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22487) - you deserved it (2203)

On 08/29/2011 at 11:56pm - misc - by TheJazzKid - United States (California)

Today, I got suspended for bringing a "hazardous weapon" to school. They were earrings. FML

#17584476
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30397) - you deserved it (3232)

On 08/26/2011 at 8:03am - misc - by christine brown - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, life gave me lemons, delivering them straight to my nuts via my neighbor's tennis ball shooter. FML

#17573986
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24487) - you deserved it (2363)

On 08/25/2011 at 12:24am - health - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, some blowhard on a motorcycle yelled at me for jaywalking, causing him to almost hit a dumpster. He picked up and threw an empty beer can at me when I started giggling at the sticker on the front of his helmet that said "If you can read this, I have lost my caravan." FML

#17572437
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8920) - you deserved it (24644)

On 08/24/2011 at 10:07pm - misc - by josie345 - United States

Today, my house got watermeloned. Not egged, watermeloned. FML

#17564993
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39476) - you deserved it (3440)

On 08/24/2011 at 1:28am - misc - by skichick54 - United States (Washington)



FML's blog

  • Tania's illustrated FML
  • Hi gang! How are you all doing? This week has been quite eventful for some people. Uber has been causing taxi drivers here and there to get their knickers in a twist, notable over here in France, which caused…

Friday 26 June 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: