lyvingvamp

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Offline (the 02/08/2015 at 5:41am)

lyvingvamp

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 22 March 1990 (26 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1495
  • Number of comments : 15
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About lyvingvamp : Hi

lyvingvamp's page activity

Visits<b>teals</b> - the 07/07/2015 at 12:12am<b>XmasaX</b> - the 04/28/2015 at 5:55am<b>madarfakar</b> - the 06/15/2014 at 11:19pm<b>insomniacdreamer</b> - the 03/20/2014 at 4:45pm<b>baltimorelewis13</b> - the 12/20/2013 at 2:10am<b>chaserich11</b> - the 12/15/2013 at 11:29pm<b>Wormie14</b> - the 12/15/2013 at 6:44am<b>xzanex</b> - the 12/15/2013 at 12:07am<b>LilCheeno</b> - the 12/14/2013 at 10:28pm<b>Blee864</b> - the 12/14/2013 at 9:23pm<b>Trollx</b> - the 12/14/2013 at 8:42pm<b>Codezlol</b> - the 12/14/2013 at 8:36pm<b>POPURTART</b> - the 12/14/2013 at 6:57pm<b>wow_again</b> - the 12/14/2013 at 6:42pm<b>bromie22</b> - the 12/14/2013 at 6:08pm<b>apollo436</b> - the 12/14/2013 at 5:26pm<b>drake_b3</b> - the 12/14/2013 at 4:26pm<b>WeiXinLun</b> - the 12/14/2013 at 3:57pm

lyvingvamp's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

I NEED to know!

You went as far as reading the terms of use. You’re a total FML completist.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of lyvingvamp's badges

lyvingvamp's favorite FMLs

Today, I was driving through the mountains and there was a chain requirement. I went to put them on and found a note where my chains used to be saying, "Have fun in a blizzard now bitch" from my ex. FML

by snowlover / 02/16/2014 at 2:37am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got the DVD back from a dance concert I did. After watching it, I realised that I had a camel toe through the whole thing. Three and a half hours. FML

by Aggie_De / 12/14/2013 at 7:00am / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous

Today, while I was pet-sitting for my boyfriend's parents, one of their dogs killed one of their kittens. FML

by Anonymous / 09/30/2013 at 12:23pm / United States (Oregon) / Animals

Today, I had a dream in which I was playing tennis. As I hit a powerful serve, I suddenly woke up due to having slapped myself in the face. FML

by Grand Slam / 09/10/2013 at 2:44pm / Belgium (Vlaams-Brabant) / Miscellaneous

Today, while working at Subway, I was about to take a guy's order. He quickly held up a hand and asked for someone else to make his sub, because he doesn't like "ugly people" touching his food. FML

by /(•'_'•)\ / 09/07/2013 at 12:59pm / United States (Missouri) / Work

Today, I finally felt ready to make love to my boyfriend for the first time. It all went great, until I tried putting the condom on him. In the process, I managed to nick his penis not once, but three times with my nails. His eyes brimmed with tears and he completely lost his erection. FML

by fuck but no fuck / 08/02/2013 at 3:44pm / South Africa (Gauteng) / Intimacy

Today, I had my first wet dream. I woke up sweating and soaking wet. Too bad I dreamed about having intense sex with a cardboard box. FML

by Anonymous / 07/31/2013 at 12:28pm / Belgium (West-Vlaanderen) / Intimacy

Today, I was getting freaky with my boyfriend and told him to spank me. In a seductive voice, he told me not to tell him what to do. Continuing, I asked him how he was going to punish me, to which he then replied, "I'm going to punch you straight in the face." FML

by suckstosuck / 07/23/2013 at 12:04am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I overheard my mother Skyping with her new "boyfriend" about the $1,000 she just sent him. She barely knew what internet dating was three weeks ago. FML

by weneedthatmoneytoliveon / 06/26/2013 at 10:08am / Australia (Victoria) / Money

Today, I took a dump in the woods at a secluded lake. I used the leaves of a seemingly harmless tree to clean myself. However, I was unaware that the leaf was poisonous. It feels like a thousand hornets are attacking my ass-crack. FML

by poisonivyretard / 06/04/2013 at 1:15pm / United States (Rhode Island) / Health

Today, I have to defend my client in court. The defense that my client wants me to use is, "It's not a robbery if you have swag" and then goes on saying, "The judge is bound to let me go after he sees my swag." FML

by Anonymous / 05/22/2013 at 9:57pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, I told my dad that I broke up with my first serious girlfriend. He responded by blaring sad breakup songs as loud as he could throughout the house, just to see me "cry like a bitch". FML

by SteroidPenguin / 05/18/2013 at 6:33pm / United States (Colorado) / Love

Today, while shaving my nether regions, I slipped and sliced myself in three separate places. They won't completely stop bleeding. I'm virtually having a second period, and it hurts to close my legs. FML

by Anonymous / 03/22/2013 at 3:15pm / Italy (Calabria) / Health

Today, I was on my favourite forum when I saw a guy ranting at some pro-lifer fanatic. For fun, I replied "umad bro?" apparently moments after the forum founder also left an angry reply. I'm now banned for a month for "trolling the founder" and all my posts have vanished without a trace. FML

by you fuckhobbit / 12/23/2012 at 5:24pm / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous

Today, I was on my favourite forum when I saw a guy ranting at some pro-lifer fanatic. For fun, I replied "umad bro?" apparently moments after the forum founder also left an angry reply. I'm now banned for a month for "trolling the founder" and all my posts have vanished without a trace. FML

by you fuckhobbit / 12/23/2012 at 5:24pm / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous