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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 11824
  • Number of comments : 69
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About lyssgross : Hey! I'm Lyss, nice to meetcha! I love meeting people, do message me.
I have a wonderful boyfriend, a great family, and I'm really into music. Actually I just got my record deal signed sealed and delivered! I can be a grammar natzi, but on this site I'm here because of my addiction to FML posts. Some will get a random message from me, because I love meeting new people! I love perdix and docbastard, and the one with the Harry potter muggle rainbow thingy as their profile pic. Dang, I need to add some commas. Well, I sing country music and should probably go to bed. It's 3 am. Anyway, have a nifty day!

lyssgross's page activity

Visits<b>rissamarie</b> - the 08/19/2016 at 1:18am<b>brianna1494</b> - the 08/17/2016 at 10:37pm<b>danandphil</b> - the 08/10/2016 at 2:03pm<b>chrisbeaudoin</b> - the 07/29/2016 at 9:09pm<b>bee97</b> - the 07/13/2016 at 12:18pm<b>elizabeth_black</b> - the 07/07/2016 at 10:39am<b>ZombieFaerie</b> - the 07/07/2016 at 9:42am<b>p_diddy77</b> - the 05/01/2016 at 3:17am<b>laurenada</b> - the 03/21/2016 at 3:37pm<b>Random737193</b> - the 03/07/2016 at 9:12pm<b>amandagedaria</b> - the 02/15/2016 at 12:13pm<b>ChloeKissyface44</b> - the 01/22/2016 at 10:00am<b>Stiggy626</b> - the 01/21/2016 at 2:33pm<b>lurch87</b> - the 01/20/2016 at 4:07pm<b>Dany93</b> - the 01/03/2016 at 2:20am<b>goldengirlsfan</b> - the 11/25/2015 at 8:35am<b>Celeden</b> - the 10/13/2015 at 8:37pm<b>UserError94</b> - the 10/13/2015 at 3:26pm

Fucked!<b>rissamarie</b> - the 08/19/2016 at 7:18am<b>SampleSext</b> - the 10/20/2014 at 5:14am<b>Mr_Saikaly</b> - the 09/04/2014 at 3:59pm

lyssgross's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of lyssgross's badges

lyssgross's favorite FMLs

Today, my daughter asked me when was the first time I had sex. After I told her 22 she quickly shouted, "Beat ya!" She's thirteen. FML

by Noname / 03/06/2009 at 2:04pm / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy

Today, my mother told me she didn't want my girlfriend spending the night anymore. I asked why, she said she heard us doing the nasty the night before and I denied it, hoping I could call her bluff. She paused for a moment and moaned EXACTLY like my girlfriend does. FML

by ToobyFrank / 03/06/2009 at 12:51pm / United States (Missouri) / Intimacy

Today, after class I was chatting with my teacher, a really cool and stylish old black guy. I tell him he reminds me of one of those soul dudes from those 70s movies, right down to the pimp-walk. He tells me he walks that way because he was beaten for drinking out of the wrong fountain as a kid. FML

by catfish / 02/23/2009 at 5:11pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I kissed my girlfriend and she tasted like a cigarette. I don't smoke. She doesn't smoke. My roommate does. FML

by scotto / 02/22/2009 at 8:21pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love

Today, during a text conversation with a girl I've been trying to get with, she complained about how crummy of a day she was having. I told her it couldn't be as bad as she thought, and she would probably get it over it soon. Then she told me she had found out her cousin had been murdered. FML

by schellbytheseashore / 02/21/2009 at 2:30am / United States (Illinois) / Love

Today, my friend was picking on me at school by constantly tapping on my shoulder. At recess I had enough. I felt the familiar tap on my shoulder, and I drove my elbow into what I thought was my friends stomach. It was my Principal. FML

by da man / 02/11/2009 at 6:38am / Canada (Newfoundland and Labrador) / Miscellaneous

Today, my husband found the box my morning after pill came in. He had a vasectomy 10 years ago. FML

by apricot / 02/09/2009 at 7:46pm / United Kingdom (Birmingham) / Intimacy

Today, my husband found the box my morning after pill came in. He had a vasectomy 10 years ago. FML

by apricot / 02/09/2009 at 7:46pm / United Kingdom (Birmingham) / Intimacy

Today, my mom decided to tell me about her new boyfriend. I know him. I've slept with him. FML

by Noname / 02/06/2009 at 2:23pm / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was singing to my cat and she reached up and put her paw over my mouth. FML

by Noname / 02/04/2009 at 6:23am / Canada (Alberta) / Animals

Today, in class, I asked my teacher for a "rubber". I didn't realise that in America "rubber" doesn't mean "eraser", it means condom. FML

by TheEnglishOne / 01/22/2009 at 7:42pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I decided to jack it a few times because I haven't been laid in a while. After round 3 my ex called me up and said she wanted to 'talk.' When she came over she made it abundantly clear that she wanted to make whoopie. Couldn't get it up. FML

by f__k_it / 01/18/2009 at 11:30am / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy

Today, my dog found my marijuana pipe and the bag it was in and brought it to my parents. FML

by Fucked / 01/16/2009 at 2:38pm / United States (North Carolina) / Animals

Today, I signed up on one of those "cheater" dating sites. I ended up meeting my own girlfriend. FML

by Lou Czar / 01/07/2009 at 6:56pm / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy

Today, I was telling off one of my friends, a fellow student of medicine, who was spending his evenings watching "House" instead of revising for our important exam, as I was. The topic mentioned in the episode came up in the exam. He got 4 points more than I did. FML

by Gen / 12/17/2008 at 4:40am / Love