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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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lynx

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lynx
  • Town/Country : USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 14 May 1990 (21 years)
  • Number of visits : 11955
  • Number of comments : 27
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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lynx's favorite FMLs

Today, I was walking in the park when I was hit on the shin by a red ball. I was confused, until it was followed by an enormous German Shepherd dog going at top speed. FML

#6005928 (64)

I agree, your life sucks (21002) - you deserved it (1476)

On 10/26/2009 at 12:24pm - health - by Lizofsmeg (woman) - United Kingdom (Brent)

Today, I realized that I lie to my friends online and go "offline" for hours at a time so it appears that I have a life outside of the internet. FML

#5942193 (102)

I agree, your life sucks (8876) - you deserved it (21617)

On 10/22/2009 at 8:26am - misc - by Kimberly - Sent from mobile version

Today, I decided to take a personal day from class and e-mailed all of my profs saying I had flu symptoms. While standing in line at Starbucks later, someone behind me says "Glad you're feeling better. Hope you can attend class tomorrow, we'll discuss lying." It was my Ethics professor. FML

#5921538 (108)

I agree, your life sucks (4348) - you deserved it (35482)

On 10/20/2009 at 10:15pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I was walking home from my acting gig at a haunted hayride. Even after spending lots of time washing the fake blood off my hands and face, I looked like I'd murdered someone. Perhaps that's why an officer stopped me and questioned me about a stabbing that happened earlier tonight. FML

#5891401 (74)

I agree, your life sucks (25202) - you deserved it (2602)

On 10/19/2009 at 2:08am - work - by worldsbestjobgonebad (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, at work this woman came up to my counter and handed me gold top covered in gold sequins. I like to chat with the customers sometimes at work so I got all excited and said "Ooh! You shopping for Halloween?" She gave me the biggest death stare. Turns out she wasn't shopping for Halloween. FML

#5886386 (55)

I agree, your life sucks (13557) - you deserved it (10296)

On 10/18/2009 at 9:38pm - work - by moduschic (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was pretending to be a monkey for a "documentary". The branch snapped and I fell out of the tree and onto a car roof. It was after school, I fell onto the dean's BMW. The video was on facebook before I regained consciousness. FML

#5737700 (77)

I agree, your life sucks (21098) - you deserved it (7217)

On 10/09/2009 at 10:04am - misc - by jane (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I found out that the student tutor my son advised me to hire was my son's girlfriend. I have been paying her $20 an hour for the last 3 weeks to make out with my son in his room. FML

#5708797 (152)

I agree, your life sucks (23036) - you deserved it (11082)

On 10/07/2009 at 7:12pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I poured my heart out into what had to be my greatest set of lyrics for my band ever, at the same time my teacher was explaining chemical changes to the class. At the end of the lecture he picked up my paper, and set it on fire to demonstrate a chemical change. FML

#5686873 (237)

I agree, your life sucks (26725) - you deserved it (22526)

On 10/06/2009 at 6:23pm - misc - by 3LLI0TT (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my family and I went on a picnic in the park 45 minutes drive away from our house. I fell asleep beneath a tree. They left me there. FML

#5645796 (59)

I agree, your life sucks (29996) - you deserved it (2330)

On 10/04/2009 at 5:33pm - misc - by walker (man) - United States (California)

Today, I learned that the gap between the elevator and the 6th floor landing of my apartment building is approximately one key's width wide. FML

#5525122 (118)

I agree, your life sucks (30968) - you deserved it (2156)

On 09/28/2009 at 11:01am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I learned to check inside the oven before you preheat it. Sometimes children hide their pet rabbit in there. FML

#5522422 (357)

I agree, your life sucks (54082) - you deserved it (6452)

On 09/28/2009 at 3:15am - misc - by ripfluffy (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, my plates on my car were stolen. On the way to the police station to file a police report I was pulled over. They impounded my car for driving without a license plate. FML

#5426605 (123)

I agree, your life sucks (28181) - you deserved it (5531)

On 09/23/2009 at 11:36am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my husband blew all the candles on his birthday cake while I was taking a photo in front of him. I will probably never use cocoa powder to decorate a birthday cake anymore. FML

#5424868 (100)

I agree, your life sucks (6080) - you deserved it (24038)

On 09/23/2009 at 8:08am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (South Australia)

Today, I went online to check my credit report. My credit report says that I am deceased, and have no rating. I'm at least 90% sure that this is not true. FML

#5419647 (94)

I agree, your life sucks (29088) - you deserved it (1384)

On 09/22/2009 at 8:27pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I got a client who ordered ice cream. She seemed really nice and I thought maybe she was into me. When I asked if she wanted peanuts for an additional 0.50 cents, she said no. Trying to be nice, I added them anyway free of charge. I later had to call the ambulance. She was allergic. FML

#5387856 (336)

I agree, your life sucks (6565) - you deserved it (69571)

On 09/21/2009 at 2:06am - love - by FreeOfCharge (man) - Canada (Quebec)