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lynnly143's FML badges
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lynnly143's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 11/23/2015 at 9:19am / Australia (Western Australia) / Intimacy
Today, we buried my mom. I walked past my sister's husband just in time to hear him mutter: "Hope the fire's nice and hot down there, you old hag." I told my sister. She wouldn't believe me and accused me of trying to start drama. FML
by Anonymous / 11/22/2015 at 12:45am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 11/20/2015 at 9:43am / United States (Texas) / Love
by Anonymous / 11/16/2015 at 3:23am / Maldives (Maale) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was on the bus home from work when I felt something strange in my hair. I turned to look, and saw the old woman next to me sucking on the end of my hair. When she noticed me staring, she didn't stop but instead said, "So pretty. Can I have?" FML
by Koizumiii / 11/15/2015 at 1:47pm / United States (Virginia) / Transportation
Today, I screamed like a little girl and scrambled to climb atop the toilet seat when I saw a cockroach running around our bathroom. My 5-year-old nephew came in, slapped it to death and said not to be scared, because he'll always protect me. FML
by MyBallsForSaleOnEbay / 08/21/2015 at 11:25am / Malta / Kids
Today, I heard my sister screaming from the basement, "Don't you hit me, you asshole!" Knowing her boyfriend was over, I ran downstairs with my baseball bat, ready to smash the fucker hitting my sister. Turns out they were just playing Mario Kart and he rammed her off the edge of a bridge. FML
by baberuth / 06/19/2015 at 6:21pm / New Zealand (Auckland) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 06/05/2015 at 11:58am / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous
by Zufallian / 06/02/2015 at 8:55pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous
Today, my boyfriend decided to suddenly stop in the middle of sex, just as I was actually starting to enjoy myself, just to bear hug me and exclaim, "Crikey, she's angry!" in the voice of Steve Irwin. He laughed so hard at his own joke that he went soft and couldn't continue. FML
by Anonymous / 05/16/2015 at 5:11am / United Kingdom (Aberdeen City) / Intimacy
Today, my window broke and will not close. My room is in a wooded area. I've already chased out two squirrels and a bird and it's only been an hour. I'm afraid I'm gonna wake up like Snow White with all sorts of wildlife sleeping with me. FML
by alekoi / 05/13/2015 at 11:15pm / United States (Washington) / Animals
by brittrus / 05/08/2015 at 9:44am / Canada (Ontario) / Transportation
by Anonymous / 04/19/2015 at 11:06am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by ThatSlappinBass / 04/17/2015 at 10:00pm / United States (Rhode Island) / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, I found out my parents have been slipping birth control pills into my morning orange juice… 2Today, I found out my husband has been catfishing my sixteen year-old brother for over a year. FML 3Today, I babysat a kid who was such a bratty little prick that I actually considered walking out on…