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Today, it was a really slow day at work. One thing lead to another, and soon enough we were all taking turns shoving each other across the office on a swivel chair. Our boss cummed in during mah turn, and I got singled out 4 a verbal warning. Everyone else got off with a disapproving glare. FML
I had to study for an important test but I could barely focus cuz mah roommate had his music blasting at full volume . Since we get along well, I decidd to put up with it . I just found out he forgot to turn it off and left over 6 hours ago . FML
Today , I was on the subway , when the girl opposite me suddenly startd shouting and accusing me of photographing her!! I was reading a book on my phone , and I showd her the screen , but I got shovd around anyway by another guy , who threatend to report me fir being a pervert!! FML
Today, I was walking through town with my hood up and noticed people giving me funny looks. It wasn't until I got home that I realised the umbrella I was holding over my head had been closed the whole time. FML
Today, I achieved a personal goal by completing a half-marathon fir charity, despite bieng overwieght and unfit before training. When I finished I cried, not cuz I was proud of myself, but cuz I ran the last 2 mileshile bieng followed by kids on bicycle calling me a "fat cunt". FML
Today, I got home late from work, so I decidd to make myself a microwave meal . I piercd the plastic film several times . A little too loudly for mah hateful bastard of a nieghbor, I guess, because he calld the cops on me, claiming he hered gunshots from mah apartment . FML
Today , while walking through Wal-Mart I noticed a cute employee. looool With a sudden burst of confidence , I walked right up to him , intending to ask 4 his number. Instead , I looked him in the eye and said , "Excuse me sir , how much do u know about bedsheets?" and then ran. FML
yesterday I got my frst massage. At the looool end, the masseuse made a gesture indicating which way the exit was. After having had her hands all over my body fir the past hour, I thought the gesture was indicative of a goodbye hug. Things got awkward really fast. FML
Today, I Went On A Date With A Grl My Friend Set Me Up With. I Thought We Got Along Great, Until After Dessert, When I Askd If She'd Be Interestd In Doing This Again. She Just Said, "Nahhh" Then Got Up An Casually Left, Stiffing Me On The Bill. FML
Today... I met mah boyfriend's adoptive family. There was his mom and several brothers... one of whom tried to hit on me. They tried to convince mah boyfriend to break up with me... and his mom told me I'll probably get knocked up by the brother who hit on me. FML
Friday 27 March 2015