About lux : D:
lux's FML badges
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
It’s in the can
Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
lux's favorite FMLs
by ruffrider / 02/05/2009 at 9:09am / United States (South Carolina) / Intimacy
Today, I turned on my camera to find pictures of my dad's secretary giving him a blowjob. Minutes later, I hear a scream from another room as my 12-year-old sister discovers similar pictures on HER camera. Mom and dad say it's no big deal. FML
by rexob / 02/04/2009 at 10:51am / United States (California) / Intimacy
by Mavis / 02/03/2009 at 2:54am / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy
by Nikki / 02/02/2009 at 7:56am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
by anonymous / 02/01/2009 at 5:53am / United States (New York) / Intimacy
by bad surprise / 01/26/2009 at 4:45pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy
Today, I was trying to be-friend a boy who was sitting alone. He had his gameboy nearly plastered to his eyes. I, cleverly, say to him, "Geeze don't put that thing so close, your eyes will fall out!" He took off his sunglasses, eyes going crooked, and said, "I'm legally blind." Insert foot here. FML
by thatsjustgreat / 01/24/2009 at 7:27pm / United States (New Jersey) / Kids
Today, I was jerking one off and my cat jumped out of nowhere and dug his claws into my shaft. Attempting to knock him away resulted in three nasty gashes... that I now have to explain to my wife. FML
by stanDman / 01/19/2009 at 1:05pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy
Today, my man and I were having sex on edge of bed. We were using chocolate spread and I was riding him. When we were done, he got up and I noticed a long brown line on the edge of the bed. I knelt down to smell it. It was NOT chocolate. FML
by Poopy / 01/12/2009 at 11:19am / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, my boyfriend and I were looking for our bubblegum flavored "numbing" lotion to have some morning fun. We couldnt find it anywhere. After about 10 minutes, my little nephew comes from my room crying and drool coming out of his mouth. He smelt like bubblegum, his mouth and tongue were all numb. FML
by LiLGeek / 01/12/2009 at 10:37am / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, I fell asleep on the train, totally wiped out after last night's party, which involved lots of booze and spicy Indian food. I wake up and notice a small boy staring at me, so I smiled at him. He turned to his father and said, "Daddy, the farting man has just woken up." FML
Today, I was baby-sitting four rather noisy and rowdy kids. After a two hour struggle, I finally manage to get them into bed. I then ask them what they want before going to sleep, and the eldest replies: "Can you tell us a story where you die at the end?" FML