About lux : D:
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, my boyfriend and I were fooling around. I was sitting up on my bed when he reached down near my privates and said, "Wow babe, did you shave today? It's so soft..." He was actually touching my bottom roll above my vagina which delightfully formed a crease. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46031) - you deserved it (16476)
On 02/25/2009 at 11:09pm - intimacy - by sopathetic (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)
Today, at work, we finally got a digital projector so our theater can show 3D movies. Our first movie is The Jonas Brothers Concert. FML
I agree, your life sucks (57729) - you deserved it (7189)
On 02/25/2009 at 8:31pm - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (Indiana)
Today, I went to get a condom because my boyfriend and I were going to have sex for the first time. When I opened the drawer, I saw that every single condom had a Jesus pin stabbed through it, and a note on top of the box: "love mom." FML
I agree, your life sucks (102699) - you deserved it (17444)
On 02/24/2009 at 8:20pm - intimacy - by Noname (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I was on an Easyjet flight, next to two attractive girls, listening to a track which starts with a woman pleasuring herself. I don't like this track so I go to skip it but accidentally unplug my headphones, activating my phone speakers and revealing the said woman at the peak of her orgasm. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17863) - you deserved it (43169)
On 02/24/2009 at 6:57am - intimacy - by Byron fiddles (man) - Hungary (Budapest)
Today, I arrived at my parents house for dinner. When I got there, I noticed that they had gay pride flags hanging from the porch, and gay rights bumper stickers plastered to their cars. There was also a huge "We accept you, Nick" banner hanging from the garage. I'M NOT GAY! FML
I agree, your life sucks (73658) - you deserved it (4393)
On 02/22/2009 at 10:04pm - misc - by Nick (man) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I went to the store to buy some condoms for my girlfriend, Kim and I. I was in a rush and when I looked at the cashier realized it was her father. Nervous and hoping to reassure him, I go "don't worry, I'm not using these with Kim." That didn't help. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21501) - you deserved it (55973)
On 02/22/2009 at 8:38pm - intimacy - by madfather (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, while I was making out with my boyfriend, he left my dorm suddenly without telling me where he was going. A few hours later, he texted me to tell me that being with me made him feel dirty and he had gone to confession. He then called me a sinner. FML
I agree, your life sucks (67060) - you deserved it (5797)
On 02/21/2009 at 10:23pm - intimacy - by not getting any anymore (woman) - United States (California)
Today, My mom walked in on me and my 2 year crush about to have sex. When she saw us she said "oh I'll just wait outside, I know it wont be long anyway." FML
I agree, your life sucks (71381) - you deserved it (5845)
On 02/21/2009 at 12:41am - intimacy - by Noname (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, I drunk dialed my mom and told her I was so high and drunk that I thought the KGB was coming after me. When I woke up this morning, my mom told me that she's no longer paying for college. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13666) - you deserved it (91215)
On 02/20/2009 at 6:42pm - money - by Noname (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I woke up after having had sex with my 4-year crush expecting to find him in bed next to me. Instead, I found my cell phone with a text message from him that said "you should really do something about the pimples on your ass." FML
I agree, your life sucks (59770) - you deserved it (9229)
On 02/20/2009 at 6:25pm - intimacy - by acw2110 (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, at a strategy session my manager displayed a flow chart of his employees. I wasn't included. Apparently I had been fired and they forgot to tell me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46650) - you deserved it (943)
On 02/20/2009 at 12:30am - work - by Noname (man) - South Africa (Gauteng)
Today, I went bowling with my mom and she paid for 2 games. By the 6th frame of game 1 she was bored and to get her money back for both games she told the employees I shit my pants. I'm 17. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45967) - you deserved it (2630)
On 02/19/2009 at 4:47pm - money - by Noname (man) - United States (Maryland)
Today, I was eating at a restaurant with my boyfriend, he is 6'2 and i am 4'11. Out of nowhere, the hostess started openly flirting with him, and asked him if he needed a booster chair for his daughter. FML
I agree, your life sucks (62196) - you deserved it (3410)
On 02/18/2009 at 5:57pm - misc - by not-so-young-shortie (woman) - United States (Indiana)
Today, my mom cleaned up my room. I had a drawer filled with condoms, 2 vibrators, and a bondage kit. She organized the condoms and vibrators in a shoe box. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22493) - you deserved it (45003)
On 02/18/2009 at 5:26pm - intimacy - by swtkiss1 (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I woke up to the sound of scissors. My mom was cutting my hair while I was asleep. FML
I agree, your life sucks (50062) - you deserved it (4071)
On 02/18/2009 at 4:16am - misc - by w_t_f (woman) - United States (Texas)
Monday 20 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
