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lungjiao

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lungjiao

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  • Number of visits : 541
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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lungjiao's page activity

Visits<b>airborneranger7</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 10:26pm<b>DeadCDbooZ</b> - the 06/28/2014 at 4:23am<b>notabeachbabe</b> - the 05/29/2014 at 4:16pm<b>nancy4494</b> - the 05/07/2014 at 12:04pm<b>iHiccupBS</b> - the 11/06/2013 at 9:45pm<b>gary3768</b> - the 10/24/2013 at 11:59pm

lungjiao's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

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You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

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lungjiao's favorite FMLs

Today, it's my mom's birthday. Got the perfect gift, the perfect card and of course the perfect cake. Well, it was the perfect cake until my dog's ass crushed it. FML

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend in the missionary position. Once again, our cat decided to crawl onto his back and stare at me. FML

#21276776
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31695) - you deserved it (4466)

On 10/13/2014 at 6:20am - intimacy - by Drafrica (woman) - South Africa

Today, my drunk husband came home, got into bed, and started humping the body pillow. He ended up whining about how I hadn't come yet, then angrily slurred that I must be cheating on him. All I could do was stay quiet and wonder how the idiot even made it home alive. FML

#21266933
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45270) - you deserved it (3477)

On 09/28/2014 at 11:30am - intimacy - by tw@ (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, I babysat a 10 year old from hell. She kept insulting me, saying I have tiny boobs, that boys must hate me, and that I'm ugly. I eventually got fed up and put her to bed. When her parents came back, she ran out of her room in tears and told them I'd beaten her. They believed it. FML

#21258738
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38999) - you deserved it (2264)

On 09/15/2014 at 11:51am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my girlfriend texted me saying, "I have some Durex and want your help" so I rushed to her house. She had meant to say "Duluxe". I had to help her paint her bedroom. FML

#21257403
91 comments

Today, I got rear-ended because my ultra-clingy girlfriend wouldn't let go of my hand long enough for me to shift gears. FML

#21220481
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43318) - you deserved it (10295)

On 07/25/2014 at 5:18pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Derbyshire)

Today, my boyfriend reckoned that he has a better sleep when he falls asleep with his hand on either my boobs or my ass. I kind of just laughed it off. I later discovered he's 100% correct when he put his hand on my butt, and not five minutes later was snoring. FML

#21217074
8 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40193) - you deserved it (6571)

On 07/22/2014 at 4:44am - love - by and the truth comes out (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my wife was putting her finger in my bellybutton and making overly sexual noises. I thought this was all fun and games until I realized she was actually into this. FML

#21209385
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47684) - you deserved it (5304)

On 07/14/2014 at 11:25pm - intimacy - by thedoc (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend informed me of how I had really hurt his feelings. Apparently, not wanting to be sent a photo of his poop is hurtful. FML

#21188342
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39551) - you deserved it (5278)

On 06/25/2014 at 7:38pm - love - by Anonymous - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, after being a vegetarian for 5 years, I found out that my boyfriend of 2 years has secretly been feeding me meat. His reason is that he thinks it's "funny" that I still call myself a vegetarian afterwards. FML

#21182417
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42541) - you deserved it (8791)

On 06/20/2014 at 10:04pm - misc - by secret meat (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my doctor got my blood test results from the lab. He looked at me gravely and told me I had just weeks left to live. After I started hyperventilating and crying, he burst out laughing and said he was kidding. He then prescribed me some iron tablets and sent me on my way. FML

#21182241
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51026) - you deserved it (5909)

On 06/20/2014 at 7:03pm - health - by legitfile.bat.virus.exe (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was feeling frisky and asked my boyfriend if he wanted a blowjob. He said "Fuck no", then rolled over to go to sleep. FML

#21182128
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50199) - you deserved it (8697)

On 06/20/2014 at 5:19pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I was feeling unappreciated and asked my boyfriend if he loves me. He faltered and replied, "Uh, my dick does." FML

#21180513
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45933) - you deserved it (7667)

On 06/19/2014 at 10:33am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, we had a guy come into the hospital with a carrot stuck deep in his anus. I've heard all kinds of ridiculous cover stories, but his took the cake; he claimed the phone rang while he was showering and he slipped onto a box of vegetables. Guess who had to extract the carrot. FML

#21179512
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52390) - you deserved it (4607)

On 06/18/2014 at 3:06pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, less than a day after my cranky downstairs neighbor passed away, I woke up to banging sounds against his apartment ceiling, like the ones he used to make whenever I walked around during the night. I'm shitting myself in fear. FML

#21161740
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44609) - you deserved it (4194)

On 06/03/2014 at 3:01pm - misc - by mdsfkljsfsdrewr (man) - Lebanon (Beyrouth)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

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FML's blog

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  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

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