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lunalay990's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 05/21/2013 at 2:31am / United States (Indiana) / Work
by Anonymous / 05/20/2013 at 4:36pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by pixkalexi / 05/20/2013 at 4:14pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Health
by well okay then / 05/20/2013 at 12:02pm / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous
Today, I listened to my elderly bachelor neighbor moan, "Oh, kitty, kitty, kitty! Oh kitty!" for over half-an-hour before he wandered out on his balcony in wet, tight white underwear to water his plant. This is the fifth time this week, and I still don't know what on earth he's doing. FML
by Anonymous / 05/20/2013 at 11:56am / United States / Miscellaneous
by soreloser / 05/20/2013 at 2:32am / United States (Montana) / Miscellaneous
by KatielSilver / 05/20/2013 at 1:44am / United States (Washington) / Health
by ForeverAlone / 05/20/2013 at 12:47am / United States / Love
Today, I got my nails, hair, and makeup professionally done for prom. My dad got his camera out, and I presumed he was taking pictures of my date and me. When I looked at the pictures later, they were all of the dog. FML
by rach / 05/19/2013 at 6:33pm / United States (Washington) / Animals
Today, the extremely uncooperative client whom I'm trying to defend in court sent me a letter in which he threatened to sue me, because charging him for my services supposedly violates his "constipational rights". FML
by harrington61 / 05/19/2013 at 5:27pm / United States (Texas) / Work
Today, the weather was beautiful, so I decided to go out skating. I guess I took a wrong turn into a bad neighborhood, because I ended up being chased several blocks by a group of jacked-up thugs wielding baseball bats and taunting, "Skate or die, homie!" FML
by Anonymous / 05/19/2013 at 4:33pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, my wife gave birth to a beautiful baby girl. She's perfect in every way, except for her birth mark. It's under the corner of her left eye and looks almost exactly like a prison teardrop tattoo. FML
by Anonymous / 05/19/2013 at 2:33pm / Canada (Alberta) / Kids
by disappointed dad / 05/19/2013 at 3:35am / United States / Kids
Today, I woke up and went into my living room, only to be greeted by my aunt, sister, and mother watching a very graphic video showing women giving birth. They forced me to stay and watch it until the end. It was almost 90 minutes. FML
by dafuqdidisee / 05/19/2013 at 2:30am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I lent a pair of expensive headphones to a "friend" for the weekend. As a thank-you, he bought me a soda. He moved this weekend, taking the headphones with him. I lost a $250 pair of headphones for a $1 soda. FML
by Anonymous / 05/19/2013 at 12:16am / United States (Montana) / Miscellaneous
- Today I was doing work in an office without a door when some random lady sprayed the entire office… Today, I gave my dad whiplash. He was teaching me how to drive stick, and I let the clutch out too… Today, I took the biggest shit ever. Problem: I'm in Thailand where the sewage system really sucks,…