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luckyno1

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luckyno1

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Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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luckyno1's favorite FMLs

Today, I went for a job interview. I was asked if I wanted a drink. I have no idea why, but I replied "a bottle of milk please." FML

#15855605
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19106) - you deserved it (29493)

On 04/20/2011 at 4:10am - work - by bham boy -

Today, I finally got the courage to talk to a guy I secretly like. I was so nervous that instead of saying, "Hi, I'm Veronica," I said, "Veronica, I'm high." FML

#15851636
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31864) - you deserved it (7607)

On 04/19/2011 at 9:38pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I watched my dog chase his tail for ten minutes, thinking "wow, dogs are easily entertained." Then I realized that I'd been watching my dog chase his tail for 10 minutes. FML

#15762337
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17664) - you deserved it (36431)

On 04/12/2011 at 10:20pm - animals - by Anonymous -

Today, while at the beach, my little sister thought it would be cute to feed a small seagull some of her food. Minutes later a flock of seagulls swarmed and attacked me and my sandwich. FML

#15683687
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23468) - you deserved it (3609)

On 04/07/2011 at 7:28pm - misc - by ihateseagulls (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I woke up to what I thought was my 9 month old son breastfeeding. It was my boyfriend. According to him, he wanted to experience what his mother never gave him as a kid. FML

#15561412
276 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39502) - you deserved it (7657)

On 03/30/2011 at 2:26pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my girlfriend and I were playfully arguing about who loved the other more. After about a minute of this, my girlfriend walked over and kicked me in the crotch as hard as she could. She then said, "There, now you don't love me as much. I win." FML

#15539670
276 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46068) - you deserved it (15398)

On 03/28/2011 at 11:33pm - love - by ouch - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was waiting for the bus while wearing my FML shirt. A passer-by stopped, stared at me for a moment, and said, "I agree, your life sucks." FML

#15528931
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27395) - you deserved it (53666) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 03/28/2011 at 9:51am - misc - by Danou - Sent from mobile version

Today, on the way home from the dog groomer, my great Dane had a bout of diarrhea in the car. I slammed on the brakes and my other freshly shampooed dog slid off the seat and into the pile of crap. FML

#15510596
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28456) - you deserved it (9868)

On 03/27/2011 at 6:06am - animals - by StinkyDogs (man) - United States (California)

Today, I got a call from my 8 year old son's teacher. Apparently, my kid has been charging girls a quarter to touch his "special area." FML

#15472026
409 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48625) - you deserved it (8008)

On 03/24/2011 at 8:43pm - misc - by omg - Canada (Alberta)

TODAY, I PRESSED CAPS LOCK ON MY LAPTOP AND THE KEY GOT STUCK. NOW ALL OF MY LETTERS ARE IN CAPITAL LETTERS. I HAVE TRIED EVERYTHING. FML

#15415559
253 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36702) - you deserved it (31277)

On 03/21/2011 at 1:32pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Wiltshire)

Today, I went to the doctor for an infection from where a cat bit me while I was sleeping. Where that cat came from and how it got into my bedroom I will never know. FML

#15291539
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31518) - you deserved it (2837)

On 03/13/2011 at 9:19am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, while driving home I saw a few deer running beside me. I stopped to let them go in front. Instead, one face-plants, ramming into the side of my brand new car. FML

#15266728
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24811) - you deserved it (4237)

On 03/10/2011 at 8:44pm - misc - by JulieClaire -

Today, I treated my mom to a movie and lunch after she'd attended weeks of AA meetings. She snuck in a flask to the movie, and during lunch, she started calling people muggles. FML

#15128111
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28664) - you deserved it (3109)

On 02/26/2011 at 4:53pm - misc - by BackToRehab - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my cat died while walking around the kitchen. He had a heart attack when the toaster popped out two slices of bread. FML

#14753781
275 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48144) - you deserved it (3949) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/29/2011 at 3:09am - animals - by Anonymous - France

Today, I woke up to my new roommate staring at me, just a few inches from my face. She then told me how easy I would be to kill in my sleep. Then she stood up, naked from head to toe. FML

#14719810
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40676) - you deserved it (3306)

On 01/26/2011 at 12:40pm - misc - by 123roomielover (woman) - United States (Michigan)



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