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Between your Facebook account and your FML account, things are no longer complicated: their relationship is official. We like this.
I agree, their lives suck
200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Today, I got a phone call from my cheating ex asking if I would go out with him that night. After 3 years of no contact, I decided to give him another chance and gave him my address for his GPS. I was then told that I lived too far and he didn't want to drive. He cancelled. I live 15 minutes away. FML
Today, I was at the cinema. There was a really tall woman in front of me and whenever I leaned to the right or left she would lean to the same side I do. Later, she started laughing. They guy next to her was telling her where I moved. FML
Today, I realized that if you are too lazy to get completely dressed in the morning and only put on a top, you should not answer a Skype video call from your boss that involves you standing up, turning around and grabbing files from your filing cabinet all in clear view of your web cam. FML
Today, I found out that my daughter is dating my boss' daughter. I found this out because my extremely homophobic boss told me and wants me to 'heal' them or get fired. I didn't even know my daughter was gay. FML
Today, I was walking out of a bar when someone grabbed me by the throat, and slammed me against a wall, saying "Stop fooling around with my wife, because next time - I'll kill you." I'm gay and haven't been with a woman since 1985. FML
Today, I saw the girl I had started dating changed her Facebook relationship status to "In a relationship". Naturally, I changed mine too. The next time I logged on, she had commented, "Really?! Who?!" She was serious. FML
Today, I started a new job as a maid. As I was cleaning the master bedroom's en-suite bathroom, the owners of the house came in and started making love. I was too scared to admit I was there, but after there was silence for a few minutes I thought it might be safe to leave. It wasn't. FML
Today, my parents decided to visit me. When I first got my apartment I gave them a key "just in case" and today they used this key to enter when I didn't answer their knocking. I didn't answer because I was having sex with my boyfriend. My parents saw everything. They didn't know I was gay. FML
Friday 12 December 2014