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lowj007

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lowj007

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1062
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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lowj007's page activity

Visits<b>Raleaf</b> - the 10/19/2014 at 10:52pm<b>Nsswimmer</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 7:34am<b>AllyCady14</b> - the 12/20/2013 at 10:19pm<b>haylburg</b> - the 09/07/2013 at 11:42am<b>jadeluv</b> - the 08/20/2013 at 4:41am<b>mikailanicole98</b> - the 08/03/2013 at 2:31am<b>Wizardo</b> - the 07/17/2013 at 4:45pm<b>punkyboy</b> - the 07/12/2013 at 10:10pm<b>graceinsheepwear</b> - the 07/11/2013 at 1:12pm<b>KiddoKS</b> - the 07/06/2013 at 11:29pm<b>MadMaddyson</b> - the 07/01/2013 at 1:51am<b>Nilla_Please</b> - the 06/26/2013 at 1:29pm<b>InfamousRaider</b> - the 06/16/2013 at 7:06pm<b>buckdharma</b> - the 06/14/2013 at 1:16pm<b>Immekel</b> - the 06/05/2013 at 4:14pm<b>sameboysamesame</b> - the 05/27/2013 at 10:52pm<b>seniorchang</b> - the 05/20/2013 at 10:02am<b>man_in_black08</b> - the 05/12/2013 at 3:04pm

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Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

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lowj007's favorite FMLs

Today, I asked my 12-year-old son what he wanted for his birthday. He looked me dead in the eyes and said, "A whore." FML

#21265910
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40595) - you deserved it (6340)

On 09/26/2014 at 5:07pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I went with a couple of my friends to see a friend who's fallen very ill. Her dad walked in with a gun and demanded to know which of us had gotten his daughter pregnant. By the time I realized it was a joke, I'd already pissed myself. FML

#21261205
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34623) - you deserved it (4392)

On 09/19/2014 at 11:30am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Vermont)

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She just grabbed the ring and said in a raspy voice, "My precious..." FML

#21250558
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41774) - you deserved it (7881)

On 09/02/2014 at 2:58pm - love - by anonymous - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was doing a design sketch for work. I snapped a pic and sent it to my boss. She replied, "Impressive. Nice sketch too." I was drawing at home, naked. My dick was in the picture. FML

Today, my wife bought a strap-on. I'm about fifty miles beyond terrified. FML

#21184387
266 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57648) - you deserved it (7994)

On 06/22/2014 at 4:34pm - intimacy - by possibly fucked (man) - Portugal (Lisboa)

Today, my girlfriend thought it'd be witty to buy a miniature stop sign, and hold it up when she gets bored during sex. FML

#21180516
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50462) - you deserved it (14223)

On 06/19/2014 at 10:37am - love - by stopinthenameoflove - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, my older brother managed to convince my younger sister that she's actually a boy, and that she'll soon be getting a penis in the mail, which she excitedly told everyone she could. He convinced me of the exact same thing as well several years ago. FML

#21174074
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43771) - you deserved it (6297)

On 06/14/2014 at 2:42am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, my son got in serious trouble after he was caught trying to sell weed to people in the street. The good news is that the "weed" was just actual weeds he'd pulled from our lawn. The bad news is that at age 16, my son is too stupid to know the difference. FML

#21158441
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50999) - you deserved it (7151)

On 05/31/2014 at 5:30pm - kids - by idiot says "you raised him" (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I collected my students' final essays. One of them submitted a printout of a screenshot he took with his phone. Too bad a browser address bar was still in the shot, along with a "click to read more" link at the bottom. My students are too dumb and lazy to even plagiarize properly. FML

#21148317
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42860) - you deserved it (4443)

On 05/22/2014 at 12:47pm - work - by What am I doing with my life? - United States (Colorado)

Today, I went on a date for the first time since my divorce was finalized a year ago. The first question the guy asked me was what my favorite sex position is. FML

#21135207
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46945) - you deserved it (5532)

On 05/09/2014 at 10:37pm - intimacy - by CEO - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was teaching my 4 year old daughter how to use "stranger danger". Later that day, we went out and since I didn't buy her a ice cream, she kept screaming "STRANGER DANGER!" A total stranger tackled me until the cops arrived. FML

#21134481
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46910) - you deserved it (6318)

On 05/08/2014 at 11:01pm - kids - by imnotastranger (man) -

Today, while playing basketball, my friend thanked me for passing the ball to him. I was too embarrassed to tell him that that was me shooting. FML

#21106910
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33330) - you deserved it (4467)

On 04/07/2014 at 4:54pm - misc - by DetergentFrog6 (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my students all handed in their 1,000 word papers. The assignment was for them to write about a strong, benevolent leader who influenced the world. Around half of the papers were about Hitler. FML

#21102694
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40224) - you deserved it (9484)

On 04/02/2014 at 7:30am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was out with my girlfriend at a club. As a slow dance began, a guy approached and asked, "May I cut in?" My girlfriend surprised me by saying, "Sure!" As I was about to protest, the guy cut me off and said, "Sorry miss, I was asking him." FML

#21059471
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46415) - you deserved it (6557)

On 02/13/2014 at 8:31pm - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, as a priest's helper in church, I was giving Communion. It took me three people to realize that every time I was giving them the Eucharist, I was saying, "May the force be with you". FML

#21041278
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41448) - you deserved it (12506)

On 01/26/2014 at 11:37pm - work - by sabz21 - United States (Connecticut)



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