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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Sunday 24 November 1991 (24 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 6436
  • Number of comments : 54
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 23 posted

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looloothing's page activity

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looloothing's favorite FMLs

Today, I was making out with this guy, and I ask him if he wants to take my bra off. He has some trouble getting it off and says, "This is strange, I do it for my sister all the time." FML

by fme / 12/08/2010 at 9:34am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I was making out with this guy, and I ask him if he wants to take my bra off. He has some trouble getting it off and says, "This is strange, I do it for my sister all the time." FML

by fme / 12/08/2010 at 9:34am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I told my parents that I wanted a little brother. My dad apparently thought it would be funny to tell me that my mom just swallowed my little brother. FML

by Anonymous / 11/13/2010 at 2:14am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I was in the car hooking up with my boyfriend. He was on top of me when I noticed my neighbor jogging toward the car. Instead of hiding, I felt compelled to wave as he jogged past us. FML

by Caught / 11/11/2010 at 8:34am / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, I was in a public washroom and I had to take a dump. I knew how dirty the toilets were, so tried to do the "stand and poo." Unfortunately, I slipped and the poo fell on the ground. Then I realized there were no paper towels. There was a line outside waiting. FML

by sweet_stufz / 11/11/2010 at 8:30am / Canada (Ontario) / Health

Today, on the subway, a little tipsy, I sat down next to a guy I thought was cute, hoping to enjoy some harmless flirting. I said, "Hello." He said, "May I ask you a question?" I said, "Sure." He said, "Can you please move away from me?" FML

by Anonymous / 11/11/2010 at 12:48am / United States (New York) / Transportation

Today, I went shopping with my new "It's true, I'm a Ninja" shirt on. Suddenly an apple comes and hits me right in the eye. A little boy runs up to me, yells "You aren't a Ninja! A Ninja would have caught that!", and runs off. FML

by Anonymous / 11/07/2010 at 8:13pm / United States (Texas) / Kids

Today, I held my cousin's new baby, whom I have nicknamed Canteloupe Head. He then reenacted the Exorcist by projectile vomiting all over my lap and shirt. His mom is a firm believer in karma. FML

by Anonymous / 10/13/2010 at 12:22pm / United States (Georgia) / Kids

Today, I walked past two guys on the street. I heard one of them whisper, "Jeez, that girl looks like Donald Trump." FML

by Anonymous / 09/30/2010 at 8:47pm / United States (New York) / Love

Today, my mom was going through the newspaper and cutting out coupons for me to use. She hands me two of them, one for tampons and the other for a pregnancy test saying "well, you're gonna need one or the other this month." FML

by anonymous / 09/17/2010 at 4:19am / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend told everyone I queef during sex. Even his parents are calling me "Cooter Pooter." FML

by Anonymous / 08/30/2010 at 2:02am / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, while casually sitting at a bar, a drunk biker with no teeth leaned over and tried to kiss me. I'm a sailor in the Navy, but I think I screamed like a little girl. FML

by dentallycorrect / 08/19/2010 at 1:16am / United States (Illinois) / Love

Today, one of my cousins offered to sell me his mac for a low price. When I got it, I realized it was an old toshiba painted white with an apple sticker on it. My cousin still insists it's a mac. FML

by roflcopter / 08/18/2010 at 8:53pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, I discovered that my mom is having an affair... with her cousin. FML

by Drew / 08/05/2010 at 1:18am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I start work in an office, with my mother. FML

by Anonymous / 08/03/2010 at 2:17am / United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire) / Work