This member hasn't filled in the description.
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
Checking you out
You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.
Today, I was making out with this guy, and I ask him if he wants to take my bra off. He has some trouble getting it off and says, "This is strange, I do it for my sister all the time." FML
I agree, your life sucks (40459) - you deserved it (4332)
On 12/08/2010 at 9:34am - intimacy - by fme (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I was making out with this guy, and I ask him if he wants to take my bra off. He has some trouble getting it off and says, "This is strange, I do it for my sister all the time." FML
I agree, your life sucks (40459) - you deserved it (4332)
On 12/08/2010 at 9:34am - intimacy - by fme (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I told my parents that I wanted a little brother. My dad apparently thought it would be funny to tell me that my mom just swallowed my little brother. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47328) - you deserved it (6501)
On 11/13/2010 at 2:14am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, I was in the car hooking up with my boyfriend. He was on top of me when I noticed my neighbor jogging toward the car. Instead of hiding, I felt compelled to wave as he jogged past us. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4983) - you deserved it (27140)
On 11/11/2010 at 8:34am - intimacy - by Caught (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, I was in a public washroom and I had to take a dump. I knew how dirty the toilets were, so tried to do the "stand and poo." Unfortunately, I slipped and the poo fell on the ground. Then I realized there were no paper towels. There was a line outside waiting. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13208) - you deserved it (24814)
On 11/11/2010 at 8:30am - health - by sweet_stufz - Canada (Ontario)
Today, on the subway, a little tipsy, I sat down next to a guy I thought was cute, hoping to enjoy some harmless flirting. I said, "Hello." He said, "May I ask you a question?" I said, "Sure." He said, "Can you please move away from me?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (8089) - you deserved it (20322)
On 11/11/2010 at 12:48am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I went shopping with my new "It's true, I'm a Ninja" shirt on. Suddenly an apple comes and hits me right in the eye. A little boy runs up to me, yells "You aren't a Ninja! A Ninja would have caught that!", and runs off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16469) - you deserved it (46590)
On 11/07/2010 at 8:13pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I held my cousin's new baby, whom I have nicknamed Canteloupe Head. He then reenacted the Exorcist by projectile vomiting all over my lap and shirt. His mom is a firm believer in karma. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5738) - you deserved it (20925)
On 10/13/2010 at 12:22pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I was walking down the street and I passed two guys. As I went by, I heard one of guys whisper "Jeez, that girl looks like Donald Trump." FML
I agree, your life sucks (17857) - you deserved it (2433)
On 09/30/2010 at 8:47pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)
Today, my mom was going through the newspaper and cutting out coupons for me to use. She hands me two of them, one for tampons and the other for a pregnancy test saying "well, you're gonna need one or the other this month." FML
I agree, your life sucks (18610) - you deserved it (6187)
On 09/17/2010 at 4:19am - misc - by anonymous - United States (Georgia)
Today, my boyfriend told everyone I queef during sex. Even his parents are calling me "Cooter Pooter." FML
I agree, your life sucks (28064) - you deserved it (4807)
On 08/30/2010 at 2:02am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, while casually sitting at a bar, a drunk biker with no teeth leaned over and tried to kiss me. I'm a sailor in the Navy, but I think I screamed like a little girl. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24555) - you deserved it (3593)
On 08/19/2010 at 1:16am - misc - by dentallycorrect - United States (Illinois)
Today, one of my cousins offered to sell me his mac for a low price. When I got it, I realized it was an old toshiba painted white with an apple sticker on it. My cousin still insists it's a mac. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13226) - you deserved it (23294)
On 08/18/2010 at 8:53pm - misc - by roflcopter (man) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I discovered that my mom is having an affair... with her cousin. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46719) - you deserved it (2958)
On 08/05/2010 at 1:18am - intimacy - by Drew - United States (Texas)
Today, I start work in an office, with my mother. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20125) - you deserved it (8763)
On 08/03/2010 at 2:17am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
