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Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
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loludeserveit

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loludeserveit
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 331
  • Number of comments : 58
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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loludeserveit's favorite FMLs

Today, I received an email from an ex who I haven't heard from in two years. Excited that it might be her asking if we could meet up, I opened it. It was a virus. FML

#12978381 (178)

I agree, your life sucks (22016) - you deserved it (5981)

On 09/09/2010 at 3:58pm - love - by kevdev (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I got circumcised. After the surgery, my girlfriend got drunk and texted all of her friends about it. FML

#12969357 (268)

I agree, your life sucks (19828) - you deserved it (3748)

On 09/08/2010 at 10:15pm - health - by Chester (Seattle) - United States (Washington)

Today, after church, my 5-year-old son asked me about God, so I answered his questions in full. We talked about God for over 2 hours. At the end of it all, he pondered for a moment, before saying to me "That's the stupidest thing I ever heard. You're dumb." FML

#9721953 (185)

I agree, your life sucks (18460) - you deserved it (41104)

On 04/08/2010 at 12:27am - kids - by bleredoshia (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I caught my dog attempting to shit on the carpet. When I saw him, I screamed. Startled, he ran around the house, continuing to take his shit. Now, I don't have to clean up a nice pile, I get to go on a scavenger hunt and find all of the scattered turds. FML

#8837524 (105)

I agree, your life sucks (13486) - you deserved it (7694)

On 03/05/2010 at 12:17am - animals - by Catois (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, we were working with infant and adult CPR dummies. After practising flawless CPR on the adult dummy, I announced "And that's how you save someone." Then I tripped on the baby dummy and fell. My co-worker stood up and yelled out, "And that's how you kill a baby." FML

#8805170 (184)

I agree, your life sucks (4514) - you deserved it (16080)

On 03/03/2010 at 7:07pm - misc - by DUMMIE (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my boss was using my computer and tried to copy and paste a website URL. It must not have copied first, because it pasted a URL to a porn site. I think I should start looking for a new job. FML

#8749925 (191)

I agree, your life sucks (3808) - you deserved it (22087)

On 03/01/2010 at 3:50pm - work - by themanontheright - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, as I was about to leave my house in my brand new heels, I stepped on a dead mouse. My heel went through it. FML

#8370926 (165)

I agree, your life sucks (20581) - you deserved it (3441)

On 02/17/2010 at 10:05am - misc - by juwkgo (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I found out that when an officer screams, "DON'T MOVE OR I'LL TASE YOU". It really means, "If you so much as flinch I'm going to shoot and 50,000 volts will be directed through your nose and groin." FML

#6785905 (144)

I agree, your life sucks (17277) - you deserved it (7686)

On 12/16/2009 at 11:02pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was in line at the store behind a lady and her young daughter. Trying to be polite I smiled at the little girl. She burst into tears asking her mommy 'what is wrong with that ladies teeth'. Apparently braces on a 25 year old is not 'kid friendly'. FML

#6221644 (50)

I agree, your life sucks (18701) - you deserved it (1875)

On 11/08/2009 at 11:37pm - kids - by itsjustmyluck (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was at lunch with my girlfriend. The waitress came up and asked for her number, then asked if she had a significant other. I laughed as my girlfriend gave the waitress her number. They're going on a date, tonight. FML

#5548309 (205)

I agree, your life sucks (35382) - you deserved it (4690)

On 09/29/2009 at 3:09pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my college roommate whom I've never met moved in. Good thing I wasn't completely naked, playing with myself on the couch when he walked in. That would've been awkward. FML

#4983449 (103)

I agree, your life sucks (6196) - you deserved it (23636)

On 09/01/2009 at 7:44pm - intimacy - by mrboston (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was at the mall blasting music, I was wearing a nice shirt and had my ipod in my breast pocket when I noticed a cute girl smiling at me so I smiled back and she started to walk over while turning down my music while smiling. It looked like I was rubbing my nipple. FML

#2131299 (208)

I agree, your life sucks (21080) - you deserved it (48324)

On 05/20/2009 at 11:08pm - love - by zero_minded12 (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I had my first job interview and didn't have much of an appetite because of the nerves. So I grabbed a brownie that my roommate had left in the fridge and ate it on the train ride in to the city. About 20 minutes into my interview I was so stoned I couldn't speak. FML

#1550190 (368)

I agree, your life sucks (111570) - you deserved it (26061)

On 05/02/2009 at 2:28am - work - by Dunzo15 (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my best friend and I performed a rap to our whole school. The rap was "made up" by our friend. After the performance, a lot of friends asked me why I did a rap from Hannah Montana. Apparently the rap was off of a show for 8 year olds. We are 17 and people think we watch Hannah Montana. FML

#1336947 (264)

I agree, your life sucks (11073) - you deserved it (37472)

On 04/25/2009 at 10:03pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Indiana)