lolatflyingducks

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lolatflyingducks

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4040
  • Number of comments : 74
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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lolatflyingducks's page activity

Visits<b>SuumahEli</b> - the 03/06/2016 at 2:31pm<b>infected150</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 8:05pm<b></b> - the 03/10/2011 at 3:34am<b>kittysonikku</b> - the 08/24/2009 at 8:57pm<b>Ace1985</b> - the 08/21/2009 at 5:12pm<b>evander1122</b> - the 08/21/2009 at 1:11am<b>blargity</b> - the 05/22/2009 at 7:18pm<b>animaguskid</b> - the 05/20/2009 at 12:23am<b>JBiz</b> - the 03/30/2009 at 6:07pm<b>jack6179</b> - the 03/30/2009 at 12:22am

lolatflyingducks's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

lolatflyingducks's favorite FMLs

Today, my husband and I were in bed, and just as I was about to finish he screamed, "Oh shit! It's 4:15, my strawberries are gonna whither!!!!" and then jumped off me and went to check on his farm on FarmVille. An imaginary farm, on Facebook. FML

by demk / 08/20/2009 at 10:51am / United States (New York) / Love

Today, I found out my boyfriend stacks things on me while I sleep. Apparently his record is 4 pillows, a textbook, and the cat. FML

by Anonymous / 08/06/2009 at 7:11am / United States (California) / Animals

Today, I finally decided to tell my mother, a former Miss North Carolina winner, that I was several weeks pregnant. She immediately burst into tears and hugged me. She kept saying, "Thank god, thank god." At first I was relieved. Then she said, "I thought you were just getting fat." FML

by Anonymous / 08/03/2009 at 12:11am / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend told me that we would be living out one of his fantasies. When I showed up, ready to go, he began playing the theme song to Star Trek and asked me to call him Mr. Spock. FML

by saynotochrispine / 07/28/2009 at 12:15am / United States (Georgia) / Geek

Today, I was telling my mother about my earrings hurting my ears. I had a cut on my ear close to the piercing and she thought that I had mistaken the cut for the opening, and said (as we walked past a car full of men), "Well of course it hurts when you put it in the wrong hole!". FML

by Anonymous / 05/18/2009 at 8:40am / United Kingdom (Belfast) / Intimacy

Today, I had a very intense sexual dream that made me come and left me panting when I woke up. It was the best orgasm I'd ever had. The trouble was, it wasn't about a hot girl, or anything sexy. It was about bacon. FML

by wtfdreams / 05/17/2009 at 8:33am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I was going to have sex with my Hispanic boyfriend. I wanted to turn him on, so I asked my friend how to say "fuck me" in Spanish. She claimed it was 'pollo frito'. I then had sex, constantly screaming 'pollo frito' for an hour. I later realized I was screaming "fried chicken." FML

by FML.. / 04/06/2009 at 3:51pm / China (Hebei) / Intimacy