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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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lol123mely

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lol123mely
  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 403
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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lol123mely's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to the school I work at, to set up my new classroom. I'm 5'1" and I was carrying a backpack full of fun educational posters. I also have a new boss. When we met for the first time he was yelling at me because "there were no students allowed in here yet." FML

#4511131 (85)

I agree, your life sucks (35747) - you deserved it (1678)

On 08/13/2009 at 9:36pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Idaho)

Today, I finally got the courage to approach a girl. I've never done anything like this before. She stared me down, not saying a word, until I felt so little that I just walked away. FML

#4506987 (208)

I agree, your life sucks (35046) - you deserved it (6280)

On 08/13/2009 at 6:30pm - love - by Mark (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I finally had sex with this great guy I've been seeing. I thought I'd found a catch. We get into his room, start kissing, and things heat up. Everything is perfect until he reaches under his bed, pulls out a doughnut and shoves it into my mouth, snarling, "eat it, eat it!" FML

#4499384 (286)

I agree, your life sucks (57949) - you deserved it (5694)

On 08/13/2009 at 11:23am - intimacy - by esb (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, it was my first day at a new school. I pulled into the parking lot and saw this really cute guy. I was checking him out in my rear view mirror. When I looked ahead, there was something in the road, so I swirved real hard and took down an entire wooden fence. That something was a plastic bag. FML

#4497607 (110)

I agree, your life sucks (6540) - you deserved it (33902)

On 08/13/2009 at 8:18am - misc - by Distracted (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, my ex got dumped by his girlfriend. Seeing my opportunity I sent him a song I wrote for him about how much I still love him. He sent it on to the girl who had just dumped him claiming he had written it. They are back together. FML

#4470917 (164)

I agree, your life sucks (46076) - you deserved it (14854)

On 08/12/2009 at 7:18am - love - by sadsongstress (woman) - Belgium (Brabant)

Today, I was in the car for 8 hours driving home from North Carolina with my family. We brought my dog along and I was petting her for most of the ride. I thought she fell asleep, so I continued to play with her. She never woke up. I played with a dead dog for almost an hour and a half. FML

#4464455 (128)

I agree, your life sucks (48981) - you deserved it (2750)

On 08/12/2009 at 12:13am - animals - by jennabean (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I woke up and noticed my son was not in his bedroom. Thinking he had ran away, I reported him missing and called all my relatives. After 3 hours, my son walked in the door. He was at his friends house where I dropped him off last night. My 14 year old told me to lay off the vodka. FML

#4452078 (145)

I agree, your life sucks (5854) - you deserved it (60410)

On 08/11/2009 at 2:40pm - kids - by Momma (woman) - Canada

Today, I was picking my daughter up at day care. She was outside playing kick ball. A red ball rolls over to me, and trying to impress the kids, I kicked it over the slide. I turn around to see three crying six year olds. It was their hamster ball. FML

#4308181 (309)

I agree, your life sucks (21850) - you deserved it (59841)

On 08/05/2009 at 1:10pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I finally told my parents I would be changing bedrooms because I could no longer stand hearing them having sex, which is awkward and disturbing. Later, my dad came and asked me quietly if I thought my mom sounded "satisfied." FML

#3919884 (139)

I agree, your life sucks (68693) - you deserved it (4011)

On 07/21/2009 at 12:39am - intimacy - by fmjob (man) - Canada (New Brunswick)

Today, I was driving and saw two hot girls on the sidewalk so I rolled down the window to whistle at them. However, I failed to notice that the car in front of me had stopped at a red light. I rear ended the car, the girls ran away laughing their asses off, and now I have to pay for the damage. FML

#3919159 (309)

I agree, your life sucks (4972) - you deserved it (72687)

On 07/21/2009 at 12:14am - love - by embarrassed (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I got home and threw my phone onto my bed as usual. This time it bounced out the window. FML

#3663741 (150)

I agree, your life sucks (34449) - you deserved it (19556)

On 07/11/2009 at 9:48am - misc - by jadakorn (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend called me to break up with me. Immediately after we hung up, I started crying hysterically. I thought I dialed my best friend, and as soon as the line picked up, I yelled, "That motherfucker broke up with me!" My now ex-boyfriend replied, "Yeah, I know I did." FML

#3641578 (92)

I agree, your life sucks (35376) - you deserved it (13399)

On 07/10/2009 at 2:47pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boss walked in my office to see me busy making a little Post-it dress for my pen. FML

#3610078 (135)

I agree, your life sucks (8992) - you deserved it (38271)

On 07/09/2009 at 12:27pm - misc - by Anonymous - France (Midi-Pyrenees)

Today, I was on a double date at a restaurant with two friends of mine and a guy I really liked. Things started getting really quiet so I decided to start talking to make things a little bit less awkward even though I was eating. I ended up spitting a piece of chicken across the table. FML

#2645641 (83)

I agree, your life sucks (11013) - you deserved it (28194)

On 06/05/2009 at 10:22pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was on the phone with my best guy friend, who I have loved for years. I was talking about school and all of a sudden he said "I love you." I flipped out saying "Oh my god, oh my god. I love you, too!" He responded with "what?" He was talking to his mom, who was walking out the door. FML

#2537729 (452)

I agree, your life sucks (51707) - you deserved it (10822)

On 06/02/2009 at 4:51pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)