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locustplague

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locustplague
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Today, I was walking to my mailbox and I fell down and couldn't get up. My neighbor walked by with his dog, took one look at me struggling, said "What is wrong with kids these days, drunk at 9am" and continued on. I couldn't get up because I am still healing from a stress fracture in my hip. FML

#3715580
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44296) - you deserved it (2257)

On 07/13/2009 at 12:21pm - animals - by notwasted39 (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I met a hot guy at the club. We danced and had a really good time, so I invited him home with me for the night. The next morning, I awoke to the sound of what I thought to be running water. I looked up to find him, naked and pissing into my air conditioner unit. FML

#2682144
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45892) - you deserved it (22197)

On 06/07/2009 at 2:18am - intimacy - by anonymous (woman) - Korea Republic of (Kyongsang-bukto)

Today, my girlfriend was giving me head while I was watching Star Trek and I accidentally called her Spock. FML

#279733
513 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48814) - you deserved it (299967)

On 03/12/2009 at 5:30am - intimacy - by Noname (man) - New Zealand (Canterbury)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

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  • Bénédicte's Illustrated FML
  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

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