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lmlooten

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lmlooten
  • Town/Country : Amarillo, U.S.
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 2 July 1991 (21 years)
  • Number of visits : 51
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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lmlooten's favorite FMLs

Today, I bought weed for the first time. The dealer was an undercover cop. FML

#18240812
262 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17997) - you deserved it (59670)

On 11/13/2011 at 8:11pm - misc - by honeybadger123 - United States (Massachusetts)

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was about to lose my virginity with my girlfriend of 2 years, when I got an urgent phone call from my 9-year-old sister, telling me I had to come home immediately. My grandma fell off the toilet and got stuck between the bowl and the wall. I'm not making this up. FML

#1604682
303 comments

I agree, your life sucks (207876) - you deserved it (10116)

On 05/03/2009 at 7:22pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I took the bus to work and a sweet old lady got on after me and sat next to me. Halfway to work, she fell asleep and her head was on my shoulder. Trying to be nice, I gently tried to wake her up before my stop came. She wasn't sleeping. I let a dead woman lie on me for 30 minutes. FML

#960425
620 comments

I agree, your life sucks (550548) - you deserved it (35366)

On 04/13/2009 at 10:11pm - health - by meteorbabe0101 (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML

#253938
1625 comments

I agree, your life sucks (461799) - you deserved it (573672)

On 03/09/2009 at 6:58pm - intimacy - by RC3Welly (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my husband dropped me off at work. Ten minutes later I got a text saying "I just dropped the b*tch off I'll be there in a few baby, miss you". I asked him about it. He said, "I don't know what you're talking about, Megan". My name isn't Megan. Not even close. FML

#159600
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (990656) - you deserved it (78862)

On 02/28/2009 at 6:10am - love - by thatsucks (woman) - United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire)



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