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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, some drunk dude broke into my house while my parents were out. Scared, I asked him what he wanted, his response was "cookies." FML
I agree, your life sucks (26865) - you deserved it (2467)
On 01/10/2010 at 8:10pm - misc - by wowhoopla - Sent from mobile version
Today, after months of trying, my wife of seven years told me she is finally pregnant. I'm going to be an uncle. FML
I agree, your life sucks (53325) - you deserved it (2576)
On 01/06/2010 at 10:17pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I was watching Free Willy with my boyfriend. It was at the part where the boy leaned into the water to give Willy a hug. I asked, "How do you even hug a whale?" My boyfriend rolled over and gave me a hug, and said, "Like this." FML
I agree, your life sucks (29311) - you deserved it (9908)
On 01/05/2010 at 5:03pm - love - by leigh2812 - Sent from mobile version
Today, I planted a bit of a condom wrapper in my bed so my housekeeper would think I have a love life. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11472) - you deserved it (22350)
On 01/05/2010 at 9:06am - love - by PJ (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, while studying in India, I was peacefully journaling, reflecting and enjoying the beautiful landscape. And then a monkey threw its poo at me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21884) - you deserved it (3706)
On 01/05/2010 at 7:49am - misc - by Anonymous - India (Madhya Pradesh)
Today, I backed into our new garage door. The same new garage door that we purchased because I broke our old one by backing into it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3888) - you deserved it (3970)
Today, it was my girlfriend's birthday. She decided that her "gift to herself" would be to leave the loser who has been holding her back for two years. Hello, my name is Ben, and I am that loser. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21768) - you deserved it (3476)
On 01/03/2010 at 9:38pm - love - by birthday bash - Sent from mobile version
Today, I put cucumber slices on my eyes to help me relax. I found this very calming till I woke up to ants trying to eat my eyes out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19999) - you deserved it (5015)
On 01/03/2010 at 6:59pm - misc - by jumpy (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I woke up on the coldest morning of the year to discover that the gas fireplace has run out of propane, and there is no water because the pipes are frozen. While trying to locate the frozen pipe, I forgot to let the dog out, and she peed on the carpet. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19067) - you deserved it (4172)
On 01/03/2010 at 11:04am - animals - by BW (man) - United States (South Carolina)
Today, when my boyfriend and I were becoming intimate, his cat decides to jump onto the bed and lie right in between us. He then informs me that he wanted to stop to "preserve his cat's innocence." FML
I agree, your life sucks (20162) - you deserved it (3290)
On 12/19/2009 at 5:18am - love - by Madagascar (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I walked into Old Navy to buy myself a pair of jingle jammies. Save yourself the embarrassment: don't shake the jammies in the middle of the store to hear the jingling, because these jammies do not jingle. You'll just look like an idiot. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4336) - you deserved it (21163)
On 12/17/2009 at 12:07am - misc - by sarabalism (woman) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, my boyfriend of two years broke up with me because I was "letting myself go". When I told the little girl I babysit in the afternoons why I was so upset, she looked at me for a moment before saying, "Well, I definitely can't blame him." FML
I agree, your life sucks (19966) - you deserved it (5834)
On 12/12/2009 at 12:20am - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I started growing hair on my upper lip. I'm finally becoming a man! Too bad I'm a 17 year old girl. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30468) - you deserved it (3549)
On 12/04/2009 at 12:55am - health - by harry (woman) - Hong Kong
Today, I told my daughter how her eyes look exactly as pretty as my wife's. She told me that she loved the way my eyeballs stick out of my face, just like Elmo. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30525) - you deserved it (3673)
On 10/03/2009 at 8:33am - kids - by dessaye (man) - Singapore
Today, I went to Lidl to buy the cheapest jaffa cakes I could. They cost 35p. When I was eating them later on I put the plastic wrapper onto the side. When I'd finished eating my jaffa cakes I went to pick up the wrapper... The dog had eaten it. Cost me a £150 vet bill. Most expensive jaffas I've ever had. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17949) - you deserved it (5872)
On 09/19/2009 at 7:19pm - animals - by 909 (man) - United Kingdom (Bristol)
Monday 20 May 2013
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