liviathisbe

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Offline (the 04/11/2015 at 3:59pm)

liviathisbe

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  • Number of visits : 1110
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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liviathisbe's page activity

Visits<b>RageWolf16</b> - the 09/30/2014 at 10:05am<b>dancer_15234</b> - the 06/26/2014 at 3:02am

liviathisbe's FML badges

Consolation prize

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The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

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liviathisbe's favorite FMLs

Today, I took my son to the playground and watched him have fun. Minutes later, I was being shoved around and called a pedophile because I was there alone with no wife. By the time I convinced them I was innocent, my son was bawling. FML

by pledonasm / 03/15/2015 at 12:11pm / India (Maharashtra) / Kids

Today, my mother walked in on me watching porn. As punishment, she sat down and made me watch the rest of it with her as she gave play-by-play commentary. FML

by Anonymous / 03/05/2015 at 10:19pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was turned down from the dream job that I was promised two years ago, once my chemo and radiation therapy was finished. His excuse? He never actually expected me to survive. FML

by kysier / 03/01/2015 at 6:36pm / United States (Kentucky) / Work

Today, I met my biological parents for the first time, 29 years into my life. They turned out to be two of the most pathetic people I have ever met, and the meeting ended after they asked me to lend them money because I "literally owe them my life." FML

Today, I drove alone for the first time since I passed my test. I kept getting weird looks from other drivers and got pulled over by a cop. He said I was clearly underage and was sure my license was fake. Almost half an hour later, he finally let me go. I hate having a baby-face. FML

by all tweened out / 02/20/2015 at 3:00pm / Canada / Miscellaneous

Today, I boarded a plane. A woman decided that she didn't like where she put her carry on luggage and pulled it out from over my head. The heavy luggage then fell right into my face, the wheel smacking me in the mouth busting my lip open. She just laughed and waltzed away without a word. FML

by wellalrightythen / 02/09/2015 at 1:23am / United States (Indiana) / Health

Today, my fiancée told me about her new diet. Apparently, she is only going to drink water and tan in a tanning bed so she can photosynthesise. She thinks this will help her lose weight, since she doesn't have to eat anything. I'm dating a dumbass. FML

by lucas90 / 02/04/2015 at 4:42pm / Sweden (Stockholms Lan) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, it's been 3 months since my dog scratched my 9 year old granddaughter after she walked over and repeatedly kicked him. My daughter has disowned me and won't let me see my own grandchildren until I have my companion of 11 years "destroyed". FML

by Anonymous / 01/24/2015 at 1:33pm / Romania (Giurgiu) / Animals

Today, my girlfriend was making lunch and asked me to pass her the peanut butter. I'll never know why, but as I handed it to her I said the first thing that came to mind: "I really want a dog." She looked at me in horror, then told me to get out of her house. FML

by Anonymous / 01/10/2015 at 3:00pm / United States (Vermont) / Love

Today, my girlfriend was making lunch and asked me to pass her the peanut butter. I'll never know why, but as I handed it to her I said the first thing that came to mind: "I really want a dog." She looked at me in horror, then told me to get out of her house. FML

by Anonymous / 01/10/2015 at 3:00pm / United States (Vermont) / Love

Today, I stumbled across one of my son's English assignments. Apparently, he decided to submit a haiku about how electrical outlets are technically "whores" because they hook up with countless cords for a "charge." I don't know whether to be amused or furious. FML

by MySonThePoet / 10/26/2014 at 10:42pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Kids

Today, my son asked for my help with a personal matter. I was flattered that he trusted me, since he's a paranoid, untrusting psycho. Turned out he wanted to use my locksmith skills to break into his ex's house and "teach her a lesson" for breaking up with him after he cheated on her. FML

by Bob H. / 10/26/2014 at 9:54am / Canada (Quebec) / Kids

Today, I was hugging my girlfriend after she had a really bad day at work, when she burst into tears and started sobbing. For some reason that I'll never understand, it gave me a hard-on. She felt it, and now she thinks I'm a sick bastard. FML

by Anonymous / 10/25/2014 at 2:44pm / United States (Alabama) / Intimacy

Today, I got robbed. I just moved so I didn't have much in my new house. They did decide that my cat was valuable enough to steal. FML

by FML / 10/05/2014 at 7:30pm / United States (Texas) / Animals

Today, I got dumped by my boyfriend. He said it was because he lived 2 hours away, but I think the ultrasound photos his other girlfriend posted proudly on his Facebook wall are the real reason. FML

by kitkat / 09/17/2014 at 3:48pm / United States / Love