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littlehomette

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littlehomette
  • Town/Country : Hershey, PA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1862
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

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littlehomette's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up from a sexy dream about my boyfriend. Too bad I'd fallen asleep in my living room with my whole family over, grandma included. They were all staring. I'd been sleep humping and moaning. FML

#19749862
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31099) - you deserved it (5368)

On 06/07/2012 at 1:41pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, after having sex with my girlfriend, I jokingly held the condom above my mouth. Somehow, the condom busted, and everything went over my face. Worse still, we're now wondering just how safe this condom really was. FML

#19743887
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12259) - you deserved it (34269)

On 06/06/2012 at 12:02pm - intimacy - by Rob (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, a man on the bus questioned my sexuality for being a male nurse. I asked him what he did and he said he worked in a garage. When I pointed out that I work with sexy nurses all day and he works with sweaty guys, he punched me in the stomach. FML

#19743527
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33938) - you deserved it (5624)

On 06/06/2012 at 10:19am - misc - by Bishop (man) -

Today, my father-in-law called me an idiot for buying him coffee cake because he can't have caffeine. He refuses to believe that there's as much coffee in coffee cake as there is ham in a hamburger. FML

#19742192
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16537) - you deserved it (2131)

On 06/06/2012 at 1:23am - health - by 635CSi (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my husband went nuts. He's quit his job and set out building an amateur bomb shelter in our backyard. According to him, there's "substantial evidence" that cannibalism is on the rise across the country, and that "it's gonna be like Resident Evil out there, babe." FML

#19738484
343 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26307) - you deserved it (2974)

On 06/05/2012 at 1:21pm - love - by why... (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I walked in on my mother stroking my cat and murmuring, "Don't worry, kitty. One day, you and I... we will rule." FML

#19734981
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24471) - you deserved it (2608)

On 06/04/2012 at 8:54pm - animals - by Scared (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I found out that my new girlfriend breastfeeds her dolls. FML

#19730259
279 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25361) - you deserved it (2182)

On 06/04/2012 at 12:34am - misc - by whattheheck - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I took my girlfriend to a family dinner so she could meet my parents. Over the dinner, she asked my dad what's he's been up to since he retired. He replied, "recreational gynecology, my dear" and gave her a weird wink. FML

#19716339
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27375) - you deserved it (2319)

On 06/01/2012 at 4:46pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Greece (Attiki)

Today, I was at work when a customer, who was going to pay for her groceries, started sorting through her money. She put some coins in her mouth, seemed to suck on them for a while, and then gave them to me. FML

#19712104
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21902) - you deserved it (1386)

On 05/31/2012 at 9:20pm - work - by Elmoo - Netherlands

Today, I couldn't find my hairbrush anywhere; I ended up having to brush my hair with a fork. FML

#19712062
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18077) - you deserved it (6273)

On 05/31/2012 at 9:14pm - misc - by jemila (woman) - United States

Today, my little brother got his crush to go out with him by impressing her with his level 500 FarmVille. This is the next generation. FML

#19708903
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25507) - you deserved it (1958)

On 05/31/2012 at 8:43am - kids - by Discouraged - United States (Maryland)

Today, while sitting in my Forensic Psychology class, my professor listed all of the main traits that indicate someone may very well be a sociopath. Every single trait described my fiancé perfectly. FML

#19708258
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22831) - you deserved it (4702)

On 05/31/2012 at 2:50am - love - by Getmeout (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was so broke I went to Costco, not to buy anything, but to eat their free food samples. FML

#19706786
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25524) - you deserved it (3033)

On 05/30/2012 at 9:52pm - money - by thedri11 - United States (California)

Today, I was cutting the grass, it was really hot and I fainted. I woke up to see my mom standing over me. I thought she was going to freak out and call an ambulance. Instead she said, "Good, you're up. Now you can finish." FML

#19705989
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21504) - you deserved it (1896)

On 05/30/2012 at 7:07pm - misc - by Aw522 - United States (Pennsylvania)



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