Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

little_fucker

Offline (yesterday at 6:04am) | Search for a member

little_fucker

0Fucked!

little_fuckerlittle_fucker
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 613
  • Number of comments : 12
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About little_fucker : I don't give a fuck

little_fucker's page activity

Visits<b>battousai1995</b> - 2 hours ago<b>ughlifesuck</b> - the 01/20/2016 at 5:57am<b>ladycoco8</b> - the 01/05/2016 at 2:49pm<b>UH60</b> - the 08/18/2015 at 12:40pm<b>Wondermage</b> - the 08/09/2015 at 3:53am<b>XohXmyXjonas</b> - the 08/08/2015 at 2:40pm<b>Apretendbiscuit</b> - the 08/08/2015 at 8:28am<b>HarryHirsch</b> - the 08/08/2015 at 12:26am<b>chuchusheep</b> - the 08/07/2015 at 4:59pm<b>ejs9576349</b> - the 08/07/2015 at 4:29pm<b>LadyLuck93</b> - the 08/07/2015 at 3:11pm<b>XxDanno316xX</b> - the 08/07/2015 at 12:38pm<b>Skarlun</b> - the 08/07/2015 at 10:49am<b>Feklfekl2222</b> - the 08/07/2015 at 10:18am<b>Toutejulie</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 6:18pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 8:28pm<b>Andrewski12</b> - the 04/14/2015 at 10:00pm<b>nesteremily</b> - the 04/13/2015 at 12:36pm

little_fucker's FML badges

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

See all of little_fucker's badges

little_fucker's favorite FMLs

Today, my husband and I decided to have a quickie before the kids woke up from their nap. The sex was amazing and I couldn't hold in my screams or not hit the wall. About 15 minutes in, both of our children came busting in with their nerf guns, screaming, "Where's the monster?" FML

#21025946
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58651) - you deserved it (35408)

On 01/12/2014 at 8:53pm - intimacy - by anon (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, a kid from my school called me, saying he's going on vacation to Japan soon and that since I was born there, I could teach him the language. His exact words at the start of the call were: "Hey man, you speak Asian, right?" I have to be around this shithead 5 days a week. FML

#20992530
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46280) - you deserved it (3798)

On 12/14/2013 at 5:39pm - misc - by bnc (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my psychotic grandma set fire to our Christmas tree because she refuses to let us celebrate what she calls a twisted pagan holiday. FML

#20992504
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41425) - you deserved it (3859)

On 12/14/2013 at 5:05pm - misc - by take a fucking seat, gran (man) - United States (California)

Today, I told my boyfriend I was pregnant. He seemed thrilled, and went to buy some wine to celebrate. He left 11 hours ago and won't come back. FML

#20991978
281 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56389) - you deserved it (7734)

On 12/14/2013 at 2:24am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was babysitting my barely-pubescent cousins, and they started talking about giving blowjobs to their "boyfriends". When I got mad at them and told them they shouldn't be thinking of that stuff, they said I was just pissed 'cause I haven't gotten laid. FML

#20984257
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52139) - you deserved it (4899)

On 12/07/2013 at 8:07pm - misc - by bella - United States (Texas)

Today, everything that was beautiful and pure in my life turned into a terrible, warped version of what it once was. Today, I lost all hope, and no longer believe that life, although sometimes shitty, is sweet and worth living. Today, I met my mother-in-law. FML

#20949272
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54858) - you deserved it (5735)

On 11/07/2013 at 5:21pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Derry)

Today, I found out that my grandma is a well-loved member of a notorious biker gang. Meanwhile, I'm a 32-year-old, single, minimum-wage nobody with no friends to speak of. She's probably getting more action than I ever will. FML

#20860751
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42129) - you deserved it (6695)

On 08/30/2013 at 7:37pm - misc - by no life to fuck :/ (man) - United States (California)

Today, I went down on my boyfriend, and tried out a new trick I learned. I read in a magazine that if you hum while giving oral, it's supposed to feel good. My boyfriend started laughing and told me to stop after 30 seconds because I reminded him of his singing toothbrush. FML

#20857818
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53964) - you deserved it (9982)

On 08/28/2013 at 12:11pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, I attended my first day of school 4 days after reconstructive surgery. But no worries: I'm sure my alien-like appearance and 2 hours of Darth Vader style breathing in an otherwise silent test room will make me lots of friends. FML

Today, I met up with my estranged father for the first time in almost 15 years. I saw him again later, while he was robbing my house. FML

Today, when I got back to my dorm, I found a trail of ants trying to shove a dead roach into a power outlet. The front desk insists that there is no pest problem. FML

#20846099
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45045) - you deserved it (2622)

On 08/20/2013 at 8:54am - animals - by TheRoad42 - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I had a group presentation. I kept zipping my jacket up and down nervously. As I waited for my turn, I realized a bunch of classmates staring at me. I forgot that in the morning rush, I only put on a jacket. I only had a bra on underneath. FML

Today, my band informed me that our gig this afternoon was actually a wedding. Whose wedding? My ex-wife's, along with the guy she cheated on me with. For their first dance, I had to sing what used to be our song. FML

#20844435
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (81041) - you deserved it (4564)

On 08/19/2013 at 9:06am - love - by Love stinks (man) - United States

Today, we were having a family dinner with my boyfriend's parents and mine. In the kitchen, when we were getting the food ready, he proposed. I screamed. My dad thought he was hurting me, came in and tased him in the leg. FML

#20841540
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61423) - you deserved it (7122)

On 08/17/2013 at 10:18am - love - by why - United States (Tennessee)

Today, while in the restroom washing my hands, a girl decided to let one rip while in the stall. When she came out she gave me a dirty look of disgust and said, "At least wait until I leave." She and I were the only ones in the restroom. FML

#20841231
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47292) - you deserved it (3196)

On 08/17/2013 at 1:11am - misc - by mugres22 (woman) - United States (California)



Maïté Verjux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie delivers in 2016
  • Greetings my young friends! It's 2016 and I'm late. No, I'm not pregnant, I'm way too old for that sort of thing, even though I've been trying a lot recently (hey there Didier, you randy rascal…

Friday 5 February 2016

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: