little92

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Offline (the 05/19/2015 at 10:57pm)

little92

0Fucked!

little92
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1006
  • Number of comments : 8
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

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little92's page activity

Visits<b>jill97</b> - the 03/26/2016 at 3:19am<b>goldengirlsfan</b> - the 03/15/2016 at 9:08am<b>Mightyrif</b> - the 05/21/2015 at 3:30am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 12:37pm<b>FlamingColor</b> - the 03/30/2015 at 9:17am<b>jfoll25</b> - the 11/23/2014 at 2:43am<b>RaspberryFlower</b> - the 11/19/2014 at 7:50pm<b>bomberos_08</b> - the 11/19/2014 at 7:06pm<b>That_Ginger</b> - the 11/01/2014 at 7:16pm<b>antipancakes</b> - the 10/22/2014 at 8:54pm<b>rocker_chick23</b> - the 10/05/2014 at 6:19pm<b>BBeffedmylife</b> - the 09/19/2014 at 12:46am<b>capslockisgood</b> - the 09/04/2014 at 6:33pm<b>RZW</b> - the 09/02/2014 at 3:44pm<b>noobly28</b> - the 05/11/2014 at 10:55pm<b>prettyliar2013</b> - the 05/11/2014 at 7:26am<b>jonmansheppard</b> - the 05/10/2014 at 10:56pm<b>Welgemoed</b> - the 05/10/2014 at 2:12pm

little92's FML badges

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little92's favorite FMLs

Today, I found that I conduct so much static electricity that I'm periodically given a shock by my headphones as I walk with them on. 5ML

by PangolinScholar / 01/24/2014 at 7:34pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend met my parents. Within minutes, my dad managed to verbally sever his balls and reduce him to tears, "just for fun" apparently. FML

by Anonymous / 01/04/2014 at 6:13pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, my wife made me go with her to dinner with her parents, despite their long-standing hatred of me. Later on, my mother-in-law muttered to me, "I made yours special for ya", smirked, then made a show of scratching at her butt-crack. FML

by ouharguohargssdf / 09/28/2013 at 5:01pm / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that my controlling, verbally abusive ex-boyfriend from nearly four years ago is still obsessed with me. Apparently, he's told everyone back home that he and I are getting married as soon as I finish college. We haven't spoken in over two years. FML

by kitkat3308 / 09/27/2013 at 2:20am / United States / Love

Today, I had to endure my girlfriend crying and screaming at me. The reason? I'm not able to please her like the fictional character Christian Grey in 50 Shades of Grey. When she left me, she took all her stuff and left me with copies of the 3 books. FML

by Anonymous / 08/20/2013 at 4:06am / United States (Washington) / Love

Today, while feeding my neighbour's cats, I mistakenly switched up their foods. One has medicated food that causes drowsiness. The healthy cat got knocked out like a log. I panicked, laid him out by the bed, and spilled milk around his head to make it look "natural." I think I'm going to hell. FML

by fuckshitcockwaffle / 05/31/2013 at 10:59am / Australia (Victoria) / Animals

Today, I agreed to help out my 4-year crush with his senior prank which is to pretend we are dating for 1 day to freak everyone out. Glad to know dating me is prank worthy. FML

by turdtonomor9 / 05/12/2013 at 10:08am / United States / Love

Today, my boyfriend and I were having Christmas dinner while his mom was away. I was lying alone on his bed while he did the dishes, when the bedroom door dramatically swung open and his mom glared at me from the doorway. I had to leave when she screamed "FORNICATION IS A SIN!" FML

by un_christmas / 12/25/2012 at 1:41am / Malaysia (Kuala Lumpur) / Love

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend doggy-style. I was getting close when he suddenly blurts out, "Babe, you really need to bleach your asshole." FML

by Anonymous / 09/30/2012 at 7:02pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. We were under the covers, and my little brother thought we were wrestling, so he got on top of the covers and started "wrestling" with us. FML

by Leyla / 07/14/2012 at 3:09am / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, I was babysitting a little girl, and we were playing with dolls. After we fed her babies, we put them down for a nap. After a few minutes, I asked if they'd had enough sleep. She looked at me like I was a freak and said, "Uh, they're not real babies, you know..." FML

by friend / 06/29/2012 at 4:48pm / Israel (HaMerkaz) / Kids

Today, I realized my paranoia is really bad when I saw my coworker holding a knife and immediately began thinking of ways to keep him from stabbing me. I work in a restaurant kitchen. FML

by Jonas / 06/06/2012 at 1:00am / United States (Texas) / Work

Today, my hatred for IKEA reignited when I rammed my knee into my hotel bathroom's plexiglass counter top while I was drying myself off. Their interior designer must have have been suffering brain damage when she matched everything with the floor tiles. FML

Today, my dad was complaining about how he makes so little money, so I suggested he invent something. The first thing that came to his mind was an automatic animal masturbator. FML

by nothowtheydoitinalabama / 02/21/2012 at 10:43pm / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy

Today, I was cooking with super hot ghost peppers. The package said "After handling them not to touch your eyes, nose or pets". They should've added "penis" to that list. FML

by Anonymous / 01/06/2012 at 9:22pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Health