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lishajoy777's favorite FMLs
Today, after coming home from school, I found that two birds have made a nest above the porch light. This wouldn't be a problem if they stopped attacking me every time I get within 5 feet of them. FML
by Locked Out / 05/14/2013 at 3:11pm / United States / Animals
by How strange / 04/20/2013 at 8:02am / United States / Love
Today, I played Call of Duty with my new flatmate. He continuously lost and was outraged that a girl beat him. It resulted in him shouting at me, claiming that since I'm Muslim, I must be part of the Taliban, which would explain my gaming skills. FML
by zahra_786 / 04/11/2013 at 5:11am / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous
by flowerging / 04/11/2013 at 12:53am / United States (New York) / Love
Today, I felt frisky, so I went over to my boyfriend's place, hoping to have some fun. I brought over a movie, and part-way through it, I started feeling him up. He responded by sighing, "That's really fucking annoying, babe. Cut it out, yeah?" FML
by sarajj / 03/29/2013 at 5:36pm / United States (Colorado) / Love
by Sarah / 08/17/2012 at 3:45am / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous
by Megan / 08/17/2012 at 3:30am / United States (Arkansas) / Money
by SquishFish / 08/17/2012 at 12:08am / United States (Massachusetts) / Love
by ThisIsGonnaBeAwkward / 12/06/2011 at 10:36am / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, I was bitched out by my 17 year old son's teacher. It seems the idiot teacher made the kids advocate for his own political beliefs in a presentation, and my son ended his speech saying, "And it remains my opinion that our instructor is cramping my motherfucking style." Instant suspension. FML
by Anonymous / 10/28/2011 at 11:52am / United States / Kids
Today, I was chosen by my coworkers to explain to my elderly boss that ''tossing the salad'' isn't another expression for saying ''brainstorming''. She didn't believe me. Guess we will all keep ''tossing the salad'' for new ideas each afternoon. FML
by welly223 / 01/20/2011 at 1:01am / Canada (Quebec) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 08/30/2010 at 2:02am / United States (New York) / Intimacy
by TheEnglishOne / 01/22/2009 at 7:42pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
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- 1Today, my boyfriend said I didn't give him enough attention because of my busy work life. So… he… 2Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's… 3Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his…