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lisaint

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lisaint

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 2 July 1996 (18 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 652
  • Number of comments : 10
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About lisaint : my boyfriend is fucking perfect and someday I'm gonna marry him :D

lisaint's page activity

Visits<b>youngsparrow</b> - 5 hours ago<b>EmperorChowilio</b> - yesterday at 10:53pm<b>RockyG92</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 1:40pm<b>Jaggzone</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 7:58pm<b>Shadowvoid</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 12:50am<b>3mikey1</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 10:47pm<b>Kirito_Kazuto</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 9:37pm<b>Pesticides</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 3:13pm<b>gogators941</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 2:14pm<b>eaglerob</b> - the 08/27/2014 at 6:57am<b>redheadedmonster</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 5:32pm<b>hotel135</b> - the 08/22/2014 at 12:42am<b>johndog699</b> - the 08/21/2014 at 3:14am<b>123914</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 10:39pm<b>farleytb42</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 7:58pm<b>nightfire2258</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 5:14pm<b>Bluebl4ze</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 3:27pm<b>patd77</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 10:04am

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lisaint's favorite FMLs

Today, while out grocery shopping with my mother, she asked me to hold a large bag of rice for her. Ten minutes later, I realized I'd been absent-mindedly stroking it the whole time, just like when I pick up my cat. FML

Today, I went to CVS to buy some tampons. The cashier said, "Ewwww... You're on your period." FML

Today, thanks to my phone's shitty predictive text combined with me being half-asleep, I accidentally offered my heartbroken buddy "oral support" if he ever needs it. FML

#21151390
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45201) - you deserved it (8822)

On 05/25/2014 at 5:23pm - intimacy - by whoops (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, in the middle of sex, my girlfriend yelled, "STUFF ME LIKE A TURKEY!" I couldn't finish. FML

#21112870
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55706) - you deserved it (7032)

On 04/14/2014 at 4:12pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, while on a date, I went to take a sip of my drink, but for some reason I expected a straw to be there. I ended up wiggling my tongue and mouth around my glass looking for it as I kept my eyes on my date. It must've looked like I was trying to be seductive in the creepiest way possible. FML

#21081466
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47921) - you deserved it (9538)

On 03/08/2014 at 3:53pm - love - by cunning glassist (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my boyfriend wanted to take our relationship to the next level. I assumed since we live together that he meant marriage. I was wrong; the next level is me jacking him off with my feet. FML

#21069326
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50442) - you deserved it (6672)

On 02/23/2014 at 12:29pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I had to explain to my husband why saving the condom from the first time we had sex is not romantic. FML

#21054738
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51451) - you deserved it (5826)

On 02/08/2014 at 7:42pm - intimacy - by O_o - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend started whispering "blowjobbbb" into my ear while we were watching a movie. When I asked him what he was doing, he denied ever saying it and claimed it must have been a subliminal message in the movie. FML

#21033101
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48197) - you deserved it (7518)

On 01/19/2014 at 6:21pm - intimacy - by Subliminal message (woman) - Switzerland

Today, I asked my husband to try a little foreplay for once, instead of just rushing into sex. His idea of foreplay was to sweetly whisper that he was going to "penis" me so hard. That's the first time I've heard the word "penis" used as a verb, and hopefully the last. FML

#21007475
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48704) - you deserved it (6437)

On 12/27/2013 at 5:39pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I overheard my boyfriend bragging to his friend about finally giving me an orgasm yesterday, but that he got scared because my orgasm face made me look like "a camel having a stroke." FML

#21007355
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44945) - you deserved it (5113)

On 12/27/2013 at 3:18pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Jamaica (Saint Andrew)

Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. As he came, he yelled "FIRST, BITCHES!" FML

#20992325
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47874) - you deserved it (8895)

On 12/14/2013 at 1:50pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) -

Today, my boyfriend's idea of foreplay was to offer to make lunch, leave the room for a few minutes, then come back with no clothes on and offer me a "cockmeat sandwich". FML

#20982904
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48358) - you deserved it (8046)

On 12/06/2013 at 3:23pm - intimacy - by fuckadaisical (woman) - United Kingdom (Rhondda Cynon Taff)

Today, in the lunch line at school, a kid literally ordered a "hamburger with extra swag." FML

#20950369
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43600) - you deserved it (3268)

On 11/08/2013 at 3:12pm - work - by thank god you'll only live once (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, as I worked as a cashier, two girls came up laughing. I smiled as I rang them up, asking what had made them laugh so hard. One looked me dead in the face and said, "You." They then both walked away, laughing. FML

#20922962
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41623) - you deserved it (3510)

On 10/16/2013 at 5:52pm - work - by amy (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)



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