Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?


Offline (the 09/03/2015 at 7:05pm) | Search for a member



  • Town/Country : Glendale, United States
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 19 July 1992 (23 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 17033
  • Number of comments : 203
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About linnie_wesker : O HAI, I'm Linnie Wesker. I'm on pretty much everyday but I rarely comment due to the abundance of RAAAAAGE and needless flame wars that seem to happen 24/7.

So yeah, there you go.

linnie_wesker's page activity

Visits<b>Lukeeeeee</b> - just now<b>Envy22</b> - the 11/18/2015 at 7:53pm<b>ucoolgirl31</b> - the 11/17/2015 at 5:46pm<b>MeanGreenGiant69</b> - the 11/08/2015 at 12:04am<b>andv888</b> - the 09/15/2015 at 2:34pm<b>FlytoHogwarts</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 6:47am<b>FusionPlacebo</b> - the 06/28/2015 at 8:32am<b>SirRipsABong420</b> - the 06/20/2015 at 3:53am<b>Miss_Mandi</b> - the 06/16/2015 at 2:49am<b>Odannyboy</b> - the 06/11/2015 at 3:19am<b>dakatabg</b> - the 06/08/2015 at 11:33pm<b>amadeclton</b> - the 06/08/2015 at 10:50am<b>LuxEtTenebris</b> - the 06/08/2015 at 9:08am<b>Psyches</b> - the 06/08/2015 at 7:02am<b>Overlord247</b> - the 06/08/2015 at 2:21am<b>meisan</b> - the 06/07/2015 at 9:48pm<b>wanted_2_want</b> - the 06/07/2015 at 6:01pm<b>mineller</b> - the 06/07/2015 at 5:42pm

Fucked!<b>Lukeeeeee</b> - just now<b>Envy22</b> - the 11/19/2015 at 1:53am<b>dakatabg</b> - the 06/09/2015 at 5:33am<b>spockadelic</b> - the 06/07/2015 at 12:38pm<b>Miss_Mandi</b> - the 06/07/2015 at 12:23pm<b>fmylifezs22</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 7:08pm<b>rafa015</b> - the 04/08/2015 at 2:32pm<b>robertd73</b> - the 12/17/2014 at 6:46am<b>RA91</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 8:44pm

linnie_wesker's FML badges

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.


You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

See all of linnie_wesker's badges

linnie_wesker's favorite FMLs

Today, after my dad trying every bait, hormone, and poison, the cockroaches in this apartment have gone crazy. They are trying to kill themselves. One tried to commit suicide, by suffocation, in my mouth this morning. FML


I agree, your life sucks (38153) - you deserved it (3493)

On 10/21/2014 at 11:42am - misc - by youngboob (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, it's my mom's birthday. Got the perfect gift, the perfect card and of course the perfect cake. Well, it was the perfect cake until my dog's ass crushed it. FML

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend in the missionary position. Once again, our cat decided to crawl onto his back and stare at me. FML


I agree, your life sucks (38363) - you deserved it (5488)

On 10/13/2014 at 6:20am - intimacy - by Drafrica (woman) - South Africa

Today, my son drank a bottle of hot sauce. It wasn't a dare, he actually thought that it would give him a fever so that he could skip school tomorrow. This idiot is 15 years old. FML


I agree, your life sucks (38949) - you deserved it (4943)

On 10/12/2014 at 8:38pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I received an email from an angry parent, demanding that I give his daughter an A on a project which I had given her a 0 on. The project was to pick an article related to science and to write an essay on it. Hers was a hoax article relating to Ebola patients rising from the dead. FML


I agree, your life sucks (37436) - you deserved it (5512)

On 10/12/2014 at 4:46pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, in the middle of sex, my husband accidentally headbutted me, almost knocking me unconscious. FML


I agree, your life sucks (37610) - you deserved it (4203)

On 10/12/2014 at 12:45pm - intimacy - by KO - United States

Today, I got married. It was a beautiful ceremony with all of our family and friends. Too bad it ended with us leaving the reception before dancing even started, since my groom couldn't stop bawling his eyes out from all the stress. FML

Today, a customer told my boss I was too pushy because I asked her what bra size she wears. I work at a lingerie store. I got a stern lecture from my boss. FML


I agree, your life sucks (41711) - you deserved it (3325)

On 08/18/2014 at 10:59pm - work - by sorrynotsorry (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, to spice things up, my boyfriend suggested we wear disguises. Amused by the idea, I accepted. That's how I ended up having sex with Gandalf. FML


I agree, your life sucks (47453) - you deserved it (10447) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 08/18/2014 at 12:48am - intimacy - by Degueusement (woman) - Sent from mobile version

Today, I went camping with my husband not too far from our house. We got our tent pitched up, stove ready and roll-out bed out. He then said, "I'm just gonna go for a walk." It had been about an hour before I decided to go find him. He had walked home to play CoD. FML


I agree, your life sucks (47305) - you deserved it (5377)

On 08/17/2014 at 6:19am - misc - by AnnoyedWoman (woman) - United Kingdom (Southampton)

Today, while walking to work, I saw a homeless guy with a funny "NEED MONEY 4 BOOZE" sign, so I gave him a few spare dollars for his humor. On my way back home, he was out cold on the sidewalk with several empty bottles beside him. Whoops. FML


I agree, your life sucks (20139) - you deserved it (38057)

On 08/15/2014 at 5:10pm - money - by thoughthewasjoking (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I was watching my 3 year old brother. He asked me to get him a cookie and I said, "What's the magic word?" He looked at me angrily and said "Bitch, please." FML


I agree, your life sucks (46792) - you deserved it (7929)

On 08/01/2014 at 9:57pm - kids - by WickedRene (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I woke to my drunk mother trying to vacuum the lawn. FML


I agree, your life sucks (49571) - you deserved it (4223)

On 05/21/2014 at 12:05pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

C comme Line's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Céline's illustrated FML
  • Hi gang! It’s a day of national pride over near the FML offices. There's a time for everything, and even if the desire to piss about to release the tension is huge, we mustn’t forget that we can…

Friday 27 November 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: