Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

linnie_wesker

Offline (18 hours ago) | Search for a member

linnie_wesker

9Fucked!

linnie_weskerlinnie_wesker
  • Town/Country : Glendale, United States
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 19 July 1992 (23 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 16406
  • Number of comments : 203
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About linnie_wesker : O HAI, I'm Linnie Wesker. I'm on pretty much everyday but I rarely comment due to the abundance of RAAAAAGE and needless flame wars that seem to happen 24/7.

So yeah, there you go.

linnie_wesker's page activity

Visits<b>insanecutie</b> - the 08/14/2015 at 5:40am<b>FlytoHogwarts</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 6:47am<b>FusionPlacebo</b> - the 06/28/2015 at 8:32am<b>SirRipsABong420</b> - the 06/20/2015 at 3:53am<b>Miss_Mandi</b> - the 06/16/2015 at 2:49am<b>Odannyboy</b> - the 06/11/2015 at 3:19am<b>dakatabg</b> - the 06/08/2015 at 11:33pm<b>amadeclton</b> - the 06/08/2015 at 10:50am<b>LuxEtTenebris</b> - the 06/08/2015 at 9:08am<b>Psyches</b> - the 06/08/2015 at 7:02am<b>Overlord247</b> - the 06/08/2015 at 2:21am<b>meisan</b> - the 06/07/2015 at 9:48pm<b>wanted_2_want</b> - the 06/07/2015 at 6:01pm<b>mineller</b> - the 06/07/2015 at 5:42pm<b>Flippier999</b> - the 06/07/2015 at 3:20pm<b>Jake42100</b> - the 06/07/2015 at 1:50pm<b>Devon2000</b> - the 06/07/2015 at 12:59pm<b>lexielou07</b> - the 06/07/2015 at 11:15am

Fucked!<b>dakatabg</b> - the 06/09/2015 at 5:33am<b>spockadelic</b> - the 06/07/2015 at 12:38pm<b>Miss_Mandi</b> - the 06/07/2015 at 12:23pm<b>fmylifezs22</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 7:08pm<b>rafa015</b> - the 04/08/2015 at 2:32pm<b>robertd73</b> - the 12/17/2014 at 6:46am<b>RA91</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 8:44pm

linnie_wesker's FML badges

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

See all of linnie_wesker's badges

linnie_wesker's favorite FMLs

Today, I was told that I need to learn to "let things go" by a woman who held a four-month grudge over a ham sandwich. FML

#21370791
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28050) - you deserved it (2416)

On 03/08/2015 at 10:36pm - misc - by NoHamForMeThanks - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I woke up this morning in a panic. Last night, I heard scratching at my door, but I thought it was just my cat and went back to sleep. This morning, it hit me that my cat is 600 miles away living with my mom in Iowa. I'm terrified to even sleep now. FML

#21370427
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33085) - you deserved it (3347)

On 03/08/2015 at 10:41am - animals - by no salt, no burning, just STFU (man) - United States

Today, a dog bit me, tearing a hole through my sweatpants, my shorts, and my underwear, all to get at the dog treat I'd hidden in my pocket. FML

#21369995
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27337) - you deserved it (8847)

On 03/07/2015 at 3:14pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)

Today, my brother was doing an extremely annoying Shrek impression, so I turned the TV on in a desperate attempt to drown him out. You'll never guess what movie was on. FML

#21369958
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (184) - you deserved it (25)

On 03/07/2015 at 2:05pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I saw my boss heading my way at work. He has a "no food in the office" policy, so I quickly scarfed down my pop-tart. I ended up choking on it so hard that I threw up. FML

#21369280
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23865) - you deserved it (18474)

On 03/06/2015 at 12:41pm - work - by f*ck (man) - Australia (South Australia)

Today, my mother walked in on me watching porn. As punishment, she sat down and made me watch the rest of it with her as she gave play-by-play commentary. FML

#21368964
265 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44480) - you deserved it (20554)

On 03/05/2015 at 10:19pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, after seven people at work approaching me and asking me if I was 'that lad from the paper', I picked one up to see what they were talking about. Turns out my doppelganger is a man who brutally murdered his older brother last year. FML

#21367159
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33176) - you deserved it (2086)

On 03/03/2015 at 9:01am - misc - by definatelynotamurderer (man) - United Kingdom

Today, while walking out of a store eating a candy bar, a homeless man tried to run up and steal my candy. I stuck a leg out and tripped him. The only thing I could think of to yell at him was, "Swiper no Swiping". My kids have ruined my coolness. FML

#21366982
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34586) - you deserved it (6700)

On 03/02/2015 at 11:57pm - misc - by Dad (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I moved to a big city, alone, from a small town. After convincing myself it wasn't that scary, I hailed my first cab. The driver spent the 30 minute ride from the airport telling me about how "sometimes, you just gotta shoot a guy" because if they steal your shoes, they deserve it. FML

#21366058
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28076) - you deserved it (2492)

On 03/01/2015 at 6:22pm - misc - by smalltownkid - United States (Texas)

Today, I was checking the family's computer history, and found that "Shrek Porn" had been searched multiple times. FML

#21365639
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30724) - you deserved it (3338)

On 03/01/2015 at 1:05am - misc - by mszoe - United States (California)

Today, while cleaning my son's room, I found an envelope labelled "PRIVATE AND CONFIDENTIAL" under his bed. I opened it, only to find it was a glitter bomb. I couldn't get it all cleaned off myself before he got home. He just said "HAH! Serves you right!" and went to his room smirking. FML

#21365242
239 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18801) - you deserved it (55653)

On 02/28/2015 at 1:11pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I saw my grandma had registered on Facebook, so I wrote a welcome post on her wall. She replied "Delete." several times, then called me, accusing me of "hacking" her and demanding that I remove my name from her page at once. FML

#21364671
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29804) - you deserved it (2671)

On 02/27/2015 at 3:20pm - misc - by Y_Y (man) - United States

Today, the neighbors called the cops because they heard "gun shots". My girlfriend and I were popping bubble wrap. FML

#21364157
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31194) - you deserved it (2690)

On 02/26/2015 at 7:35pm - misc - by We're still popping them - United States (California)

Today, my husband again lost his keys. It's a daily struggle to find them. This time they were in an ice cube, literally. He said he must have accidentally put them in there when making ice. He's going to be the father of my future children. FML

#21360688
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35036) - you deserved it (8345)

On 02/21/2015 at 10:47pm - misc - by wife - United States (California)

Today, my drinking problem became apparent when my daughter asked for a glass of juice, and I instinctively poured a large glass of scotch instead. FML

#21357563
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15605) - you deserved it (35625)

On 02/16/2015 at 8:04pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)



FML's blog

  • RoSaCe's illustrated FML
  • Back to business! Yep, everyone is back from their vacation, unless you're a rich, childfree, lovin' life-type of person who doesn't go on holiday when everybody else does, and can do whatever they…

Friday 4 September 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: