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Today, I got an email from my professor with my grade for a paper. It said, "Solid writing, but you should have proofread your final draft more carefully." In a moment of annoyance, I typed in the reply box, "God should have proofread your FACE more carefully." My elbow hit the send button. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11669) - you deserved it (48472)
On 02/21/2009 at 4:43pm - misc - by Noname - United States (Texas)
Today, I came to school late because I had to drop off my daughter at school. When I got on campus, the security told me I was late but I said, "Oh no, I work here." and he said, "Oh like I haven't heard that one before." And he took me to detention. My boss, the Principal, had to bail me out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36721) - you deserved it (2047)
On 02/21/2009 at 6:22am - work - by Lily (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was riding the train and fell asleep. A friend of mine got on a few stops later, and to be funny, shouted 'BOO!'. I woke up and was so startled I peed myself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34319) - you deserved it (3728)
On 02/20/2009 at 6:13pm - misc - by niabby - United States (Illinois)
Today, after class, my teacher pulled me aside and said "You know, I never received the e-mail regarding your disabilities that your parents mentioned. Could you have them resend it?" What disabilities? FML
I agree, your life sucks (41809) - you deserved it (1890)
On 02/20/2009 at 1:16am - work - by Jedi (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was watching a documentary on The World's Fattest Man. Half way through the show the reported started talking about his girlfriend. The Fattest Man in the world has a girlfriend. I'm 21 an have never had a girlfriend. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44016) - you deserved it (7000)
On 02/19/2009 at 8:39pm - love - by Skido (man) - United States (California)
Today, I went bowling with my mom and she paid for 2 games. By the 6th frame of game 1 she was bored and to get her money back for both games she told the employees I shit my pants. I'm 17. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45956) - you deserved it (2630)
On 02/19/2009 at 4:47pm - money - by Noname (man) - United States (Maryland)
Today, I woke up at 5 and studied for my 9:30am exam for 4 hours. When I left my dorm at 9, it was dark outside. Turns out I slept through the entire day and woke up at 5pm. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34470) - you deserved it (22697)
On 02/19/2009 at 11:57am - work - by AbsolutelyEffed (man) - United States (California)
Today, I visited my brother in jail for the first time. I didn't know what to say so I blurted out : "Are you having fun ?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (8801) - you deserved it (37214)
On 02/19/2009 at 4:06am - misc - by cynicalcindy (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was home alone tanning in my backyard which is fairly secluded. I took my top off and laid there for awhile before I looked over and saw the UPS guy standing at my gate with a package because nobody answered the door. I looked horrified and he said not to worry, he'd seen better. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34901) - you deserved it (6418)
On 02/18/2009 at 5:31pm - misc - by mediocreboobs (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my brother joked that our dog was more attractive than I was. I looked to my mom for support, and she said "Well, she is pure bred." FML
I agree, your life sucks (29688) - you deserved it (2453)
On 02/17/2009 at 9:52pm - animals - by Noname (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I kneeled down to tie my shoe and sneezed, nailing my face off of my knee and breaking my nose. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37229) - you deserved it (5485)
On 02/17/2009 at 9:43pm - health - by ouchmynose (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I got a "save the date" card for the wedding of a couple my husband knows. I was excited because I really wish to be better friends with these people. I emailed the bride, "I got your STD!" and hit send before I realized how that sounded. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7763) - you deserved it (31771)
On 02/17/2009 at 12:11pm - misc - by silkytaco - United States (Hawaii)
Today, I saw my friend across campus, and I decided that I wanted to play a trick on her and scare her from behind. Turns out, I scared a complete stranger with really bad panic induced asthma. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7807) - you deserved it (32312)
On 02/17/2009 at 3:25am - misc - by boo! (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my grandmother told me that not only does she not accept me as a homosexual man, but that she feels my relationship with a little person is "spitting in God's face." FML
I agree, your life sucks (35687) - you deserved it (9767)
On 02/16/2009 at 9:34pm - love - by iamatthewroberts (man) - United States (Kentucky)
Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up?!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (177991) - you deserved it (61464)
On 02/16/2009 at 9:29pm - kids - by offbeans (man) - United States (California)
Monday 20 May 2013
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