Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

linnie_wesker

Offline (24 hours ago) | Search for a member

linnie_wesker

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 19 July 1992 (22 years)
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 13142
  • Number of comments : 194
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

linnie_wesker's page activity

Visits<b>TommyG493</b> - 10 hours ago<b>fantasyworld</b> - the 11/15/2014 at 8:10am<b>dalink</b> - the 11/03/2014 at 9:22pm<b>tchatfield9413</b> - the 11/03/2014 at 4:37pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 10/27/2014 at 8:28am<b>NotAUser</b> - the 09/29/2014 at 11:16am<b>almostfree_kira</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 5:31pm<b>dratz</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 3:03am<b>xivoricbutterfly</b> - the 07/11/2014 at 6:44pm<b>ImaKoala</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 11:51pm<b>lectricpharaoh</b> - the 05/26/2014 at 8:59pm<b>UsernameistooLo</b> - the 05/24/2014 at 11:13am<b>ripjawed</b> - the 05/20/2014 at 9:09pm<b>iOceanus</b> - the 05/09/2014 at 10:29pm<b>kingkat9</b> - the 05/02/2014 at 11:30pm<b>gatorfan122</b> - the 03/04/2014 at 6:20pm<b>NRCB</b> - the 01/20/2014 at 12:07pm<b>Rababco</b> - the 01/06/2014 at 5:16pm

linnie_wesker's FML badges

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of linnie_wesker's badges

linnie_wesker's favorite FMLs

Today, we had a school assembly at 7:00 pm about drinking and driving. There was a cop doing a demonstration of a field sobriety test on stage. I was randomly selected to perform a breathalyzer test in front of all the students and parents. I blew 0.06. FML

#855959
265 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22543) - you deserved it (94347)

On 04/07/2009 at 4:44pm - health - by schoolgrlstaci (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I got back my math test. Instead of taking the time to mark the mistakes, my professor just circled the bottom half of the page and wrote "OMG." FML

#853708
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (92034) - you deserved it (27461)

On 04/07/2009 at 2:37pm - work - by aviators (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I went on a date with this girl I met online. The conversation drifted and we were talking about how we'd prefer to die, if we had a choice. I said, "I want to skydive over the ocean without a parachute." She said she wants to be made into a wallet. FML

#849037
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55304) - you deserved it (8877)

On 04/07/2009 at 3:08am - love - by no_leather_of_any_kind - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was walking my little sister home from the eye doctor. It was raining out so we were kind of in a hurry to get home. We get home and about half an hour later, the cops show up. Apparently, someone saw me walking my sister and called the cops on me thinking I was a child molester. FML

#843077
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (80581) - you deserved it (3203)

On 04/06/2009 at 8:42pm - kids - by omgn00blolz89 (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was ringing up a lady and her daughter at the shoe store I work at. The background on my nametag is a rainbow, and when the daughter saw it, she asked her mother why it was so. Her mother looks at my nametag, then me, then turns to her daughter and says "Because he hates God honey". FML

#827000
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65144) - you deserved it (4527)

On 04/05/2009 at 11:14pm - work - by maconda99 (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was riding my bike and stopped at a street light. A little girl looked at me, then asked her mother, "Mommy, why does that girl have a ring through her nose?" Her mother then replied, "Because her parents don't love her." FML

#818828
260 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64532) - you deserved it (17699)

On 04/05/2009 at 3:33pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, the director of the play I'm in decided to explain why we got the parts we did. He said he tried matching our characters to who we actually are. I play a whore who's a transvestite. FML

#818560
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65234) - you deserved it (6061)

On 04/05/2009 at 3:11pm - misc - by InsideActress (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I walked past a church with a bunch of people standing outside waiting for the bride and groom to walk out. When the church doors opened, I yelled congratulations as loud as I could. It was a funeral. FML

#811533
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19868) - you deserved it (73612)

On 04/05/2009 at 1:20am - misc - by oops (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I set my AIM status to be the currently-playing file on my iTunes. I've downloaded a lot of porn to my iTunes, and I wanted to watch some. My status changed to "Girl in Latex gets fucked in the ass." FML

#798927
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18995) - you deserved it (145280)

On 04/04/2009 at 12:15pm - misc - by ohshittttttt (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I went to the doctor because my arm hurt. When he told me I had tennis elbow I said "that's funny I don't play tennis". Then he asked me if I had a girlfriend. When I said no he said "Well I guess we solved this one." FML

#794025
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71127) - you deserved it (18412)

On 04/04/2009 at 12:34am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was hanging out at a friend's house. Her adorable 5 year old sister came up, gave me a hug, and said, "You're fat. When are you going home?" FML

#791194
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53733) - you deserved it (5458)

On 04/03/2009 at 10:07pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I left the iron and ironing board in my room. While I was at school, my mom decided to do some ironing, and did it in my room for convenience. The iron needed water, so she took a water bottle from my dresser and poured it in. It was my secret vodka stash, and the iron caught on fire. FML

#782957
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22254) - you deserved it (72435)

On 04/03/2009 at 2:13pm - misc - by healey16 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was talking to my boyfriend and he brushed my hair out of my eyes. Then he smiled and said "Your eyes are two different colors right now. One's blue, one's green..." I was so happy he still noticed the little things. Then he finished his sentence with "...ya know, like a dog." FML

#780789
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54879) - you deserved it (5197)

On 04/03/2009 at 10:37am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)



FML's blog

  • K'Naye's illustrated FML
  • Woohoo it's the weekend! Winter is all around some of us, but not in our hearts. To help fight off the cold and seasonal depression, this week we're taking a look at love and tenderness. It's what keeps…

Friday 21 November 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: