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Today, I came home from college to find my favorite silk nightie that I had left behind being modeled by Bernie, the family dog. Nobody will admit to who put it on him. I don't know what's worse, that my family is a bunch of assholes, or that my nightie is big enough to fit a Saint Bernard. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14461) - you deserved it (2285)
On 10/23/2012 at 2:05pm - misc - by nicedoggy (woman) - United States (Missouri)
Today, while at a psychiatric hospital working as a student nurse, I discovered one of the patients had developed an unhealthy obsession for me. He was admitted for stalking and abusing a girl who looked just like me. It's only my first week. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17649) - you deserved it (993)
On 10/22/2012 at 6:54am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)
Today, my cat played dead just so I would leave him alone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13098) - you deserved it (3814)
On 10/21/2012 at 1:59am - animals - by Anonymous - United States
Today, while driving with my puppy in the passenger seat, he jumped out of the window. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15501) - you deserved it (19921)
On 10/20/2012 at 3:16am - animals - by puppylove - United States
Today, my dad saw on TV that in some parts of Africa, it's not uncommon for people to attach make-shift flamethrowers to their cars to defend against carjackers. He's now lost his mind and is forcing me to help him put one together to scare off Jehovah's Witnesses. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12441) - you deserved it (1296)
On 10/19/2012 at 5:39pm - misc - by Watchtower? More like fortress. (man) - Norway (Oslo)
Today, I realized that I spend the same amount of money on my phone bill as I do on Nutella. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5450) - you deserved it (15095)
On 10/19/2012 at 10:19am - health - by Nutellalover (man) - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)
Today, I realized that I spend the same amount of money on my phone bill as I do on Nutella. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5450) - you deserved it (15095)
On 10/19/2012 at 10:19am - health - by Nutellalover (man) - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)
Today, I discovered my son, who has recently moved out of our home, eating his dog's food. His excuse? He wanted the new Pokemon game, and "compromises had to be made". FML
I agree, your life sucks (14962) - you deserved it (1790)
Today, I woke up after having a dream which included sex with a very hot guy. I realized it's about time I get laid, because the hot guy was Brock from Pokémon. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19923) - you deserved it (4039)
On 10/16/2012 at 6:59pm - intimacy - by L (woman) - Norway (Sor-Trondelag)
Today, my parents gave me a sock and card for my eighteenth birthday. The card said, "Now that Dobby is free, get out." FML
I agree, your life sucks (21036) - you deserved it (2392)
On 10/15/2012 at 9:19pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)
Today, I learned from my daughter's teacher that she has been wearing the same shirt for the past few weeks, ever since we had a fight about how I don't pay attention to her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4592) - you deserved it (38966)
On 10/15/2012 at 6:28am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)
Today, after weeks of coming home to find my furniture all tipped over, thinking the place was haunted, and accepting my boyfriend's offers to come over and "comfort" me, I came home from work early. I found my boyfriend in the kitchen, kicking over all the chairs. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12692) - you deserved it (5796)
On 10/14/2012 at 1:03pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Estonia
Today, while I was using my computer, my cat ran up to the power strip, looked me in the eyes, and hit the power switch, turning everything off. She does this quite often. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17441) - you deserved it (3147)
On 10/14/2012 at 3:00am - animals - by stop it ninja - United States (Virginia)
Today, just for old time's sake, I decided to jump on my bed. I ended up hitting my head on the spinning fan and knocking myself unconscious. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7872) - you deserved it (25983)
On 10/13/2012 at 2:45am - health - by lalalalainie - United States (California)
Today, I got a text message from my boss that read, "You've been very bad. Severe punishment is in order." I'm not sure whether I should be turned on or terrified. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15010) - you deserved it (1635)
On 10/10/2012 at 9:58am - work - by whatadaydanny (man) - Dominica
Monday 20 May 2013
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