Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

linnie_wesker

Offline (17 hours ago) | Search for a member

linnie_wesker

2Liked!

linnie_weskerlinnie_wesker
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 19 July 1992 (22 years)
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 14370
  • Number of comments : 200
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

linnie_wesker's page activity

Visits<b>awkwardeer</b> - the 02/24/2015 at 11:56pm<b>Evil_Jester</b> - the 02/24/2015 at 9:59pm<b>Y0UI34574RD</b> - the 02/24/2015 at 9:49am<b>dalink</b> - the 01/26/2015 at 12:22pm<b>martini47</b> - the 01/26/2015 at 10:38am<b>mickybagabeers</b> - the 12/30/2014 at 7:15pm<b>Damafia</b> - the 12/30/2014 at 9:45am<b>swharley</b> - the 12/30/2014 at 7:19am<b>LilMsDulce</b> - the 12/30/2014 at 4:13am<b>edmunson</b> - the 12/30/2014 at 2:01am<b>eatsteak</b> - the 12/30/2014 at 1:58am<b>PresAgent</b> - the 12/29/2014 at 11:29pm<b>boostedc</b> - the 12/29/2014 at 11:10pm<b>annarcheer</b> - the 12/29/2014 at 10:55pm<b>morondon000</b> - the 12/29/2014 at 9:54pm<b>mansfield_j</b> - the 12/29/2014 at 7:52pm<b>Nolimit2217</b> - the 12/29/2014 at 7:24pm<b>FuckFace10</b> - the 12/25/2014 at 6:02am

Liked!<b>robertd73</b> - the 12/17/2014 at 6:46am<b>RA91</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 8:44pm

linnie_wesker's FML badges

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of linnie_wesker's badges

linnie_wesker's favorite FMLs

Today, I overheard my grandpa telling my mom he'd found a load of porn in my laptop's browser history, but that he deleted all the "filth" so she wouldn't have to see it. She believed him and I got grounded, much to his amusement. I've never looked up porn on that computer in my life. FML

#20623130
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40089) - you deserved it (2703)

On 04/26/2013 at 1:34pm - misc - by thats what my ipod is for (man) - United States

Today, my new landlord and lettings agent made an illegal entry into my house. Unfortunately, at the time my boyfriend was buck naked, smoking a joint on the sofa, surrounded by the cats we aren't supposed to have. FML

#20620173
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29519) - you deserved it (43413)

On 04/25/2013 at 2:28am - misc - by goingtobeevicted - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I found out that the catchy Japanese song I've been obsessed with for the past week is actually about a dildo. FML

Today, I just remembered that I changed my Gmail display name to "Rice Ball" out of privacy-paranoia a while back. I've been using this same email to apply to several professional jobs. FML

#20592754
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16242) - you deserved it (36458)

On 04/15/2013 at 1:58am - misc - by geeshock1987 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I dressed up as Batman for a comic book convention. I was hit by a car on the way there by a man dressed up as the Joker for the same convention. FML

#20587443
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60774) - you deserved it (20268)

On 04/13/2013 at 1:04am - misc - by ironies a b*tch - United States (Illinois)

Today, I told my bald, goatee-sporting chemistry teacher that he looks like Walt from Breaking Bad. I quickly got sent to the principal's office and received a 3-day suspension for "slandering" my teacher by implying that he makes meth. FML

#20574865
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34172) - you deserved it (6015)

On 04/04/2013 at 4:07pm - misc - by me (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my little sister figured out how to use the printer. I came home to pictures of Nicolas Cage all over my room. FML

#20571278
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32609) - you deserved it (5277)

On 04/02/2013 at 5:22am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I nervously started a new job, and my co-workers were telling me silly rules about our boss. Later, I accidentally bumped into him, and blurted "Rule #7, don't touch George." He definitely heard. FML

#20564827
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15812) - you deserved it (31457)

On 03/29/2013 at 12:38am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my parents asked me if I was sexually active. My grandma then screamed from upstairs, "She's not even physically active!" FML

#20548943
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48465) - you deserved it (14437)

On 03/18/2013 at 4:59am - intimacy - by Susan (woman) - Ireland

Today, I went to the gym with my grandma. In the span of an hour, she was hit on more than I ever have been in my life. FML

#20547830
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32128) - you deserved it (3897)

On 03/17/2013 at 3:09pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - France (Rhone-Alpes)

Today, I held hands with the boy I like. Without thinking, I commented that his right hand is softer, as if he only used lotion on that one hand. And then we stood there in terribly awkward silence. FML

#20541635
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41967) - you deserved it (15722)

On 03/13/2013 at 12:57am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)

Today, I met the man of my dreams. We saw a movie, then went to a bar. It went perfectly, until he got wasted and started singing "Never Gonna Give You Up" to me while everyone laughed. Then I woke up, having just been Rickrolled by my own subconscious. FML

#20540752
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34684) - you deserved it (5180)

On 03/12/2013 at 12:43pm - misc - by ShadowBox (man) - Netherlands (Gelderland)

Today, my pet parrot learned a new trick. In addition to imitating my dog, and my voice when I call my mother, it can now imitate my sex noises, and likes to screech them whenever someone comes into the room. FML

#20540360
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25386) - you deserved it (8392)

On 03/12/2013 at 12:43am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my 4-year-old daughter couldn't sleep, crying that her teddy bear wants to eat her. My husband thought it would be funny to put the bear right in front of her face while she slept. She's now terrified to sleep anywhere but in our bed. FML

#20539958
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31625) - you deserved it (5902)

On 03/11/2013 at 7:32pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Ireland

Today, one of my elderly swimming students ran into me at Walmart. Being a polite teenager, I said hi to him. He looked at me surprised and said, "Oh dear! I didn't recognize you with your clothes on!" I'll never forget the look on his wife's face. FML

#20536627
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37385) - you deserved it (2869)

On 03/09/2013 at 2:02am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada



Mathilde Morieux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Mathilde Morieux's illustrated FML
  • Madonna must be the only person breathing a sigh of relief right now thanks to all the idiots arguing about the colour of a dress. Thanks to a badly-lit photograph, everyone seems to have forgotten that she super…

Friday 27 February 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: