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Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
100 kick ass comments
100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!
YDI master
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
Today, my boyfriend and I went mini golfing with his family. We had a competition going on, and when I managed to get two consecutive holes in one, he started seething and muttered that I'm dangerously close to becoming single. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5968) - you deserved it (639)
On 05/20/2012 at 2:20pm - misc - by Jacquelinez (woman) - United States
Today, I tried to beat my dad to the car. I jumped over the steel cables in the parking structure and hit my head on a metal pipe, then bounced off the wires, and onto my back on the pavement. Good thing we were already at the hospital to visit my sick mother. FML
I agree, your life sucks (1926) - you deserved it (5203)
On 05/20/2012 at 12:06am - health - by Ouch (man) - United States (California)
Today, before I went into surgery, the patient next to me just finished the same procedure I was going to get. As he woke up in the recovery area 10 feet away, I was getting my final prep before the operation. On my way into the operating room I was comforted by his screams of agonizing pain. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6188) - you deserved it (391)
On 05/19/2012 at 6:02am - health - by lubey - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I was at the laundromat when a huge, tattoo-covered man wearing nothing but denim booty shorts and a wife-beater sat down beside me. He stared at me for a while, before telling me all about how I reminded him of his "first prison bitch." FML
I agree, your life sucks (16111) - you deserved it (1052)
On 05/18/2012 at 10:35pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Today, after having a pretty rough day, I decided a nice, hot shower would be great. Ten minutes in, the shower head apparently couldn't take the water pressure anymore, and it flew off and hit me in the face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6473) - you deserved it (513)
On 05/17/2012 at 5:54pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)
Today, I woke up to the sound of my car being stolen. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6141) - you deserved it (533)
On 05/17/2012 at 4:41pm - misc - by Unhappymothersday - United States (North Carolina)
Today, in an attempt to be romantic, my boyfriend threw little stones against my window. Unfortunately, the window wasn't closed, and I was standing in front of it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5746) - you deserved it (824)
On 05/17/2012 at 11:02am - love - by Vero (woman) - Austria (Oberosterreich)
Today, I noticed that whenever someone belches, I immediately think of my boyfriend. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4403) - you deserved it (794)
On 05/17/2012 at 8:00am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, I realized that all the times I checked behind the shower curtain before peeing didn't prepare me for what to do if someone was actually there. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7607) - you deserved it (952)
On 05/13/2012 at 11:12am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I had to pick my son up from school after he beat the crap out of another student. The words that made him go nuts were apparently, "You mad, bro?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (6323) - you deserved it (864)
On 05/11/2012 at 3:30pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden (Vastra Gotaland)
Today, I asked my dad if my girlfriend could sleep over. He winked at me and agreed. When I brought her home, we went to my room for a quickie. There, I saw that my dad had taped multiple Richard Simmons posters to the wall, causing my girlfriend to suddenly come down with a "headache." FML
I agree, your life sucks (3097) - you deserved it (5280)
On 05/11/2012 at 2:29pm - love - by cockblocked (man) - United States (South Carolina)
Today, I purposely wore a red shirt to Target just so people would talk to me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5666) - you deserved it (2576)
On 05/10/2012 at 2:44am - misc - by reddd - United States
Today, I realized I was getting a bit chubbier than usual. I decided to go for a little jog to stay in shape. Little did I know, my neighbors that just moved in brought along with them, a fully grown German Shepherd. Not tamed. My "jog" quickly turned into a "sprint for my life". FML
I agree, your life sucks (6594) - you deserved it (710)
On 05/09/2012 at 11:34pm - misc - by I Don't Exorcise - United States (Oklahoma)
Today, my wife made my hand bleed by stabbing it with a fork. I'd only tried to take some fries from her plate. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3897) - you deserved it (6853) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 05/08/2012 at 11:48pm - misc - by Mouhahaa (man) - France
Today, I was shopping at Walmart, when I saw a really good deal on some bacon. Before I could take any, a huge-ass woman stormed over, kicked my cart down the aisle, and snatched every single packet for herself. And I actually got upset over this. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8594) - you deserved it (813)
On 05/08/2012 at 1:57pm - misc - by wtf is wrong with my country (man) - United States
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