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lilysloth's FML badges

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.


You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

lilysloth's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend and I tried roleplaying a teacher-student during sex. We're both studying to be actors, so we ended up going into a really deep, emotional storyline that didn't end in sex at all. FML


I agree, your life sucks (42691) - you deserved it (13648)

On 10/24/2014 at 6:54am - intimacy - by too good - United Kingdom (Kent)

Today, I stubbed the same toe three times in fifteen minutes. How? My sister moved most of the furniture in the house to the left by a few inches, because she thought it would be funny to watch me get confused and suffer. FML


I agree, your life sucks (47514) - you deserved it (6875)

On 06/21/2014 at 3:57pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Australia

Today, I heard my husband say from outside, "Seriously Dan, what could go wrong?" This was followed a few seconds later by a bang and screaming. Turns out he'd tried to smash his head through a wooden plank like a martial artist and failed. He ended up with splinters and a concussion. FML


I agree, your life sucks (42842) - you deserved it (5093)

On 06/21/2014 at 11:15am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I presented my child with the classic "Who came first, the chicken or the egg?" conundrum. In return, I got a detailed lecture on how birds evolved from dinosaurs, how life was created in the sea and an explanation about evolution. I got schooled by a 9 year old. FML


I agree, your life sucks (44294) - you deserved it (23092)

On 02/05/2014 at 2:52pm - kids - by Evolution mama (woman) - Iceland (Gullbringusysla)

Today, due to the dry weather, my nose became dry and began to bleed so I plugged it with toilet paper and went about my business. Forgetting about it, I later went out to smoke a cigarette. Not paying attention, I lit the toilet paper on fire as well. FML


I agree, your life sucks (37576) - you deserved it (42909)

On 02/04/2014 at 9:48pm - health - by anonymous - United States

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Tuesday 24 November 2015

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