lilxsexii

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lilxsexii

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Friday 26 November 1993 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1364
  • Number of comments : 28
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About lilxsexii : I'm awesome. :))

lilxsexii's page activity

Visits<b>itssnotfunny</b> - the 06/21/2016 at 2:28pm<b>anthonydpalm</b> - the 05/05/2016 at 7:23am<b>Fattie12360</b> - the 05/03/2016 at 7:59pm<b>TxAsMaD3</b> - the 03/21/2016 at 7:56am<b>Racheecha</b> - the 01/03/2016 at 4:57pm<b>C7</b> - the 12/08/2015 at 10:59pm<b>MxAxRxCxO</b> - the 12/02/2015 at 11:22pm<b>beeferjay</b> - the 10/30/2015 at 3:28pm<b>DaEpicTaco</b> - the 10/11/2015 at 1:20am<b>Raltizal</b> - the 08/05/2015 at 10:00pm<b>Woody02284</b> - the 08/04/2015 at 7:01pm<b>colinabi</b> - the 05/18/2015 at 9:31pm<b>earlpam</b> - the 02/09/2015 at 9:00am<b>taylorzgoines</b> - the 12/17/2014 at 11:17am<b>yoursmileishawt</b> - the 11/05/2014 at 6:25pm<b>phuck19</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 12:06pm<b>larosiee</b> - the 07/30/2014 at 1:28pm<b>DerpyDerpinator</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 11:20am

lilxsexii's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of lilxsexii's badges

lilxsexii's favorite FMLs

Today, I went out with my family and boyfriend for dinner. We were all having a good time, and suddenly at the end of dinner he decides to kneel down on one knee, take out an engagement ring, and say "I choose you, Pikachu," with a straight face. He was serious. FML

by mandy / 09/04/2009 at 10:19pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, I had a stressful day at work and decided to go in the jacuzzi. I hadn't used it for a year, so it was a little dirty. After I cleaned it, filled it up, and jumped in, I pressed the jets. Immediately, thousands of dead moths shot out at full speed towards me. FML

by mel / 08/30/2009 at 11:23am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was trying to have sex with my boyfriend, David. I moaned his name and he whispered, "I'm not David." Then, with an Italian accent, he said, "It's-a-me! Mario!" FML

by Michelle / 08/28/2009 at 1:11pm / United States (Maine) / Intimacy

Today, I heard my daughter scream at my son through the bathroom door, "Are you jacking off in there or something?" and him scream back at her "Shut up you fucking cunt!" My daughter is 7 and my son is 8. FML

by badmom / 06/10/2009 at 2:09pm / Canada (Quebec) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend of 2 years took me to get a tattoo done with his name on. He paid for it. After it was done he told me it was over between us and he thought it'd be a nice reminder of him for me. FML

by Angelofkarma / 05/25/2009 at 2:05pm / United Kingdom (Essex) / Love

Today, I was fingering my girlfriend. When suddenly she started crying at the peak of her orgasm, when I asked what was wrong, she replied. "I-I-I MISS HIM!" She was crying about her ex boyfriend. While I was inside her. FML

by fingerfuckd / 04/29/2009 at 11:47am / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy

Today, I woke to find my boyfriend of 2 years gone. I saw my little sister's talking bear at the bottom of my bed, it said "squeeze me" so I squeezed it and it said "it's over." It was my boyfriends voice. I was dumped by a talking bear. FML

by shawty_x / 04/26/2009 at 8:35am / United Kingdom (Hartlepool) / Love

Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. Right as I was really getting into it, he pauses, frowns, and says, "I think I see the pee hole." FML

by Anonymous / 04/17/2009 at 1:43am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend and I were watching TV. She starts to undo my belt buckle, unzips my fly and then takes my pants off. Right as I'm starting to get really excited, she says to me, "Just joking." FML

by Hikara / 04/13/2009 at 9:44am / Australia (Victoria) / Intimacy

Today, I was getting sick of listening to the guy in the next room over getting nasty with some girl, so I called my girlfriend to see if she wanted to go get some food. Then I heard her phone ring. Through the wall. FML

by Anonymous / 03/28/2009 at 4:18pm / United States (New York) / Love

Today, I wanted to surprise my boyfriend by dressing up in sexy lingerie. When I went to answer the door he was standing there with a shocked expression, his friends parked in the driveway had the same expression as well. He came to break up with me. He told me after we had sex. FML

by lollipopp56 / 03/26/2009 at 2:09am / Canada (Quebec) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend was really stressed about a guy he works with being a jerk. I told him "if you ignore something long enough, it won't bother you anymore." His response was "I've ignored my herpes for a long time but it still bothers me." We've been having sex for 3 months now. FML

by Anonymous / 03/21/2009 at 3:03pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, I texted my boyfriend of 6 months saying that I was in the mood, and that I was in bed, and naked. He texted back saying "U got fingers, use them, im going to bed xoxo". FML

by princess / 03/17/2009 at 1:06am / Canada (Quebec) / Intimacy

Today, I was having sex with a guy I met and in the middle of it his mother called him. After stopping to answer the phone, he tried to put me on with her because she didn't believe anyone would actually sleep with him. FML

by MarMar / 03/15/2009 at 4:47pm / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy

Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML

by RC3Welly / 03/09/2009 at 6:58pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy