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lilikawaii

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lilikawaii
  • Town/Country : Las Vegas, USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 25 March 1991 (22 years)
  • Number of visits : 1095
  • Number of comments : 36
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About lilikawaii : My name is Lili :) I'm just here to relax and have a laugh after a long day. ^__^ I love my boyfriend, my puppies, reading, and playing my apple ukulele.

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lilikawaii's favorite FMLs

Today, I was going to have sex with my Hispanic boyfriend. I wanted to turn him on, so I asked my friend how to say "fuck me" in Spanish. She claimed it was 'pollo frito'. I then had sex, constantly screaming 'pollo frito' for an hour. I later realized I was screaming "fried chicken." FML

#837103
563 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46767) - you deserved it (127738)

On 04/06/2009 at 3:51pm - intimacy - by FML.. (woman) - China (Hebei)

Today, I ran to a public bathroom because of explosive diarrhea. In the middle of it, I noticed there was no more toilet paper nor paper towels remaining. The smallest bill in my wallet was a 5. I had to pay 10 dollars to wipe my own butt. FML

#741988
278 comments

I agree, your life sucks (76537) - you deserved it (13451)

On 04/01/2009 at 4:16am - misc - by highleyj (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was in an elevator with my brother and a woman. He signs to me that she has a 'damn fine ass'. I chuckle and then shake my head. He shrugs. A second later the woman signs to us, 'Rick, don't you remember me?' Turns out she helped teach my brother sign language when he was six. FML

#434812
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36523) - you deserved it (19143)

On 03/18/2009 at 3:59am - misc - by elevator-troubles (man) - Australia (Australian Capital Territory)

Today, the phone kept ringing but there was only silence on the other line. The third time I yelled, "What the fuck is your F*ing problem asshole!? Get a life shithead!" and hung up. Then the pastor's wife called and explained that she mistakingly set her phone on mute. FML

#430302
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15118) - you deserved it (53908)

On 03/17/2009 at 11:48pm - misc - by jina (woman) - Korea Republic of (Seoul-t'ukpyolsi)

Today, my dad had gotten a new cell phone. So I started to mess around with the cool features on his phone and stumbled upon some pictures he had taken. Next thing I know I'm looking at my mom going down on my dad. FML

#163784
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41497) - you deserved it (20327)

On 02/28/2009 at 7:33pm - misc - by AppState (man) - United States (North Carolina)



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