lilhellian

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Offline (the 03/15/2015 at 5:31pm)

lilhellian

13Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 24 December 1994 (21 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 8228
  • Number of comments : 1819
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About lilhellian : I have accepted the duty of the being an assassin against comments such as "thats shitty." I dont just snip, I'm capable of being a ninja. I am The Puppy Assassin. I has a female pomerian chipmunk baby named joey with squeakychipmunk! I am atheist...

lilhellian's page activity

Visits<b>Lesbiantrash</b> - the 07/14/2016 at 11:49pm<b>endurancefan212</b> - the 06/23/2016 at 4:50pm<b>sassykenzie</b> - the 06/16/2016 at 3:05am<b>AnnaMuffin</b> - the 06/13/2016 at 3:20pm<b>Rababco</b> - the 06/10/2016 at 9:42pm<b>miriamfrank</b> - the 05/22/2016 at 3:38am<b>iwillreapyou</b> - the 05/19/2016 at 7:20pm<b>ADOG2645</b> - the 05/08/2016 at 11:23am<b>Death_The_Kid15</b> - the 05/01/2016 at 10:00am<b>teacupofsunshine</b> - the 04/04/2016 at 12:04am<b>aliceaudrey1997</b> - the 04/03/2016 at 6:13am<b>biggins224</b> - the 03/28/2016 at 8:08am<b>The_Unlucky1</b> - the 03/23/2016 at 9:59pm<b>skylanderninja</b> - the 03/23/2016 at 12:33am<b>n_a_v_y</b> - the 03/10/2016 at 6:09am<b>risher01</b> - the 02/25/2016 at 8:44pm<b>Emma1562</b> - the 02/23/2016 at 8:37pm<b>brother4sale</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 8:25pm

Fucked!<b>AnnaMuffin</b> - the 06/13/2016 at 9:20pm<b>Emma1562</b> - the 02/24/2016 at 2:38am<b>rcarn</b> - the 11/18/2015 at 2:18pm<b>ThunderLightTSV</b> - the 10/19/2015 at 5:33pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 5:48pm<b>Supaviper</b> - the 07/10/2015 at 4:21pm<b>SirFawkes</b> - the 07/01/2015 at 1:40pm<b>winterforever97</b> - the 07/01/2015 at 10:02am<b>Kazze</b> - the 06/23/2015 at 7:06am<b>yuno_gasai</b> - the 05/29/2015 at 10:53am<b>FlamingJazkinz</b> - the 05/21/2015 at 3:24pm<b>S13rra01257</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 9:50pm<b>dying_to_know</b> - the 09/04/2014 at 11:17pm

lilhellian's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of lilhellian's badges

lilhellian's favorite FMLs

Today, I thought it would be romantic to fill my girlfriend's room with scented candles and surprise her when she was done showering. I lied there naked, with Kenny G playing softly. I heard a knock on the door, so I told her to come in. To my surprise it was her mom. FML

by Toldyouso / 01/22/2010 at 1:16am / United States (Nevada) / Intimacy

Today, I sent my boss a link to a website I thought would answer a simple question she'd asked. Turns out, yes, the site did answer her question, but it also had some very suggestive ads on it. Apparently I'm the only person in the office who uses adblock. FML

by Anonymous / 01/19/2010 at 2:26pm / United States (North Carolina) / Work

Today, I lost my virginity to my long time boyfriend and found out I'm severely allergic to latex. I also found out that my family doctor had been transferred to the ER. He went to play golf with my dad later. FML

by Foxy / 01/10/2010 at 12:36pm / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy

Today, I made a batch of "special" brownies for a party I was going to tonight. I wrapped them up and put them on the counter with a note that said DO NOT EAT. Later on I came home from some errands to find a tray of half eaten brownies and my ten year old sister passed out on the couch. FML

by badsister / 01/10/2010 at 10:37am / United States (Illinois) / Health

Today, I was making out with my boyfriend and he tried to put his hand inside my pants. I didn't want it to be that easy so I denied, but he insisted a lot and I finally let him. He started to sing "We Are The Champions." FML

by queen / 12/29/2009 at 8:29pm / Brazil (Minas Gerais) / Intimacy

Today, I allowed my friend to talk me into going on a date. The guy's truck smelled like formaldehyde - I'm assuming from the snake that he apparently tried to turn into a necklace. FML

by KittyNeko / 12/28/2009 at 1:26am / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I took a friend home from the hospital. She was on medication that made her drowsy. She fell onto her bed and asked me to help her take off some clothes since she had her winter gear on. She passes out and her roommate walks in and catches me undressing an unconscious girl. FML

by Nemesis2747 / 12/24/2009 at 1:09am / United States (New York) / Love

Today, I found out where all my expensive bras and panties have been disappearing to. Apparently, while I'm at work, my fifteen year-old son's girlfriend has been stealing them after they have sex in my bed. FML

by Secretisout / 12/21/2009 at 10:28pm / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, I decided to attach fifteen-pound weights to each foot so I could burn some extra calories while shoveling snow. My dad asked me to move one of the cars in the driveway. When I put my foot on the gas pedal, I couldn't take it off. I ended up hitting my sister and knocking her into a snow bank. FML

by Klamp18 / 12/20/2009 at 3:28pm / United States (New York) / Transportation

Today, I walked into my room in only a towel. I walked in front of my brother to get to my computer. He said, "My webcam is on." I replied smartly by screaming, hugging the towel tightly to me, turning, and running straight into the glass door, dropping the towel. His friends saw and laughed. FML

by GlassPwn / 12/19/2009 at 12:01am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, while taking a shower, I saw shadows moving across the curtains. The shadow turned out to be a cricket that then fell into the tub. I ran out of the bathroom screaming and naked. My little sister came to my door and said, "If I hadn't just seen your balls, I would swear mom had TWO daughters." FML

by Anonymous / 12/11/2009 at 8:03pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, at work, I went to fold a pair of pants that was left in a changing room to find out that someone had taken a dump in them. FML

by g_unit / 12/10/2009 at 12:24am / Canada (Alberta) / Work

Today, I woke up in my best guy friend's bed to the sound of him jerking off. As I laid there motionless with my back to him, he reached around me to grab a tissue. I don't think I can ever speak to him again. FML

by dfkjhregoiuberiug / 12/09/2009 at 4:20am / United States (Massachusetts) / Intimacy

Today, I was on a stationary bike at the gym. I got into a conversation with a very attractive female gym-friend. I felt something cool "down below". I looked down and saw one of my testicles had sneaked out of a hole in my shorts, I quickly looked up only to see her staring at the same thing. FML

by fatguyinalittlecoat / 12/08/2009 at 2:09pm / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy

Today, my mom admitted that her story about my dad leaving us for his current wife was a lie. He left when he caught her with a coworker. She blocked his number and got a restraining order to keep him from telling his side of the story. I haven't talked to my dad for six years because of this. FML

by Anonymous / 12/03/2009 at 9:17pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous