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lilhellian

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lilhellian

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 24 December 1994 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3753
  • Number of comments : 1817
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About lilhellian : I have accepted the duty of the being an assassin against comments such as "thats shitty." I dont just snip, I'm capable of being a ninja. I am The Puppy Assassin. I has a female pomerian chipmunk baby named joey with squeakychipmunk! I am atheist...

lilhellian's page activity

Visits<b>_Slenderman_</b> - 18 hours ago<b>The9thIndividual</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 2:34pm<b>ArtemisGide</b> - the 08/23/2014 at 2:52am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 08/22/2014 at 5:52pm<b>LiLMizzerY</b> - the 08/21/2014 at 11:18am<b>ThriceWritten</b> - the 08/13/2014 at 11:10am<b>yoursmileishawt</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 11:05pm<b>Macisawesome1</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 2:07am<b>brookeleonii</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 7:51am<b>justindrew14</b> - the 08/07/2014 at 10:12am<b>danny_c_21</b> - the 08/04/2014 at 1:35am<b>PrincessHokage</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 7:20pm<b>Star1398</b> - the 08/02/2014 at 3:21am<b>jishie123</b> - the 07/30/2014 at 8:15pm<b>amp4942</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 2:09pm<b>Mads_1234</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 8:27pm<b>Paramoreloverxd</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 11:04am<b>DekutreeRipoff</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 3:52pm

lilhellian's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

See all of lilhellian's badges

lilhellian's favorite FMLs

Today, I thought it would be romantic to fill my girlfriend's room with scented candles and surprise her when she was done showering. I lied there naked, with Kenny G playing softly. I heard a knock on the door, so I told her to come in. To my surprise it was her mom. FML

#7492284
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8574) - you deserved it (19293)

On 01/22/2010 at 1:16am - intimacy - by Toldyouso (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I sent my boss a link to a website I thought would answer a simple question she'd asked. Turns out, yes, the site did answer her question, but it also had some very suggestive ads on it. Apparently I'm the only person in the office who uses adblock. FML

#7437531
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23461) - you deserved it (2488)

On 01/19/2010 at 2:26pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I lost my virginity to my long time boyfriend and found out I'm severely allergic to latex. I also found out that my family doctor had been transferred to the ER. He went to play golf with my dad later. FML

#7257583
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17749) - you deserved it (2881)

On 01/10/2010 at 12:36pm - intimacy - by Foxy (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I made a batch of "special" brownies for a party I was going to tonight. I wrapped them up and put them on the counter with a note that said DO NOT EAT. Later on I came home from some errands to find a tray of half eaten brownies and my ten year old sister passed out on the couch. FML

#7256153
383 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10885) - you deserved it (52201)

On 01/10/2010 at 10:37am - health - by badsister (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was making out with my boyfriend and he tried to put his hand inside my pants. I didn't want it to be that easy so I denied, but he insisted a lot and I finally let him. He started to sing "We Are The Champions." FML

#7020893
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9083) - you deserved it (19356)

On 12/29/2009 at 8:29pm - intimacy - by queen (woman) - Brazil (Minas Gerais)

Today, I allowed my friend to talk me into going on a date. The guy's truck smelled like formaldehyde - I'm assuming from the snake that he apparently tried to turn into a necklace. FML

#6985807
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22560) - you deserved it (2683)

On 12/28/2009 at 1:26am - love - by KittyNeko (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I took a friend home from the hospital. She was on medication that made her drowsy. She fell onto her bed and asked me to help her take off some clothes since she had her winter gear on. She passes out and her roommate walks in and catches me undressing an unconscious girl. FML

#6914931
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33366) - you deserved it (2772)

On 12/24/2009 at 1:09am - love - by Nemesis2747 (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I found out where all my expensive bras and panties have been disappearing to. Apparently, while I'm at work, my fifteen year-old son's girlfriend has been stealing them after they have sex in my bed. FML

#6874607
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23692) - you deserved it (2894)

On 12/21/2009 at 10:28pm - intimacy - by Secretisout (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I decided to attach fifteen-pound weights to each foot so I could burn some extra calories while shoveling snow. My dad asked me to move one of the cars in the driveway. When I put my foot on the gas pedal, I couldn't take it off. I ended up hitting my sister and knocking her into a snow bank. FML

#6848786
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8716) - you deserved it (47458)

On 12/20/2009 at 3:28pm - misc - by Klamp18 (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I walked into my room in only a towel. I walked in front of my brother to get to my computer. He said, "My webcam is on." I replied smartly by screaming, hugging the towel tightly to me, turning, and running straight into the glass door, dropping the towel. His friends saw and laughed. FML

#6821061
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20531) - you deserved it (13273)

On 12/19/2009 at 12:01am - misc - by GlassPwn (woman) - United States

Today, while taking a shower, I saw shadows moving across the curtains. The shadow turned out to be a cricket that then fell into the tub. I ran out of the bathroom screaming and naked. My little sister came to my door and said, "If I hadn't just seen your balls, I would swear mom had TWO daughters." FML

#6712676
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11534) - you deserved it (36721)

On 12/11/2009 at 8:03pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, at work, I went to fold a pair of pants that was left in a changing room to find out that someone had taken a dump in them. FML

#6688959
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32001) - you deserved it (2209)

On 12/10/2009 at 12:24am - work - by g_unit (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I woke up in my best guy friend's bed to the sound of him jerking off. As I laid there motionless with my back to him, he reached around me to grab a tissue. I don't think I can ever speak to him again. FML

#6676757
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19807) - you deserved it (4051)

On 12/09/2009 at 4:20am - intimacy - by dfkjhregoiuberiug (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was on a stationary bike at the gym. I got into a conversation with a very attractive female gym-friend. I felt something cool "down below". I looked down and saw one of my testicles had sneaked out of a hole in my shorts, I quickly looked up only to see her staring at the same thing. FML

#6665165
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19688) - you deserved it (4341)

On 12/08/2009 at 2:09pm - intimacy - by fatguyinalittlecoat (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my mom admitted that her story about my dad leaving us for his current wife was a lie. He left when he caught her with a coworker. She blocked his number and got a restraining order to keep him from telling his side of the story. I haven't talked to my dad for six years because of this. FML

#6590388
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47224) - you deserved it (2012)

On 12/03/2009 at 9:17pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)



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