Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

lilhellian

Online | Search for a member

lilhellian

1Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 24 December 1994 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3871
  • Number of comments : 1818
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About lilhellian : I have accepted the duty of the being an assassin against comments such as "thats shitty." I dont just snip, I'm capable of being a ninja. I am The Puppy Assassin. I has a female pomerian chipmunk baby named joey with squeakychipmunk! I am atheist...

lilhellian's page activity

Visits<b>Raleaf</b> - the 09/16/2014 at 8:26pm<b>Kbryant321</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 12:31am<b>Demonface54</b> - the 09/05/2014 at 8:42am<b>dying_to_know</b> - the 09/04/2014 at 5:16pm<b>allie2590</b> - the 09/02/2014 at 12:40am<b>Brandon1337</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 1:34pm<b>_Slenderman_</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 10:26am<b>The9thIndividual</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 2:34pm<b>ArtemisGide</b> - the 08/23/2014 at 2:52am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 08/22/2014 at 5:52pm<b>LiLMizzerY</b> - the 08/21/2014 at 11:18am<b>ThriceWritten</b> - the 08/13/2014 at 11:10am<b>yoursmileishawt</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 11:05pm<b>Macisawesome1</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 2:07am<b>brookeleonii</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 7:51am<b>justindrew14</b> - the 08/07/2014 at 10:12am<b>danny_c_21</b> - the 08/04/2014 at 1:35am<b>PrincessHokage</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 7:20pm

Liked!<b>dying_to_know</b> - the 09/04/2014 at 11:17pm

lilhellian's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

See all of lilhellian's badges

lilhellian's favorite FMLs

Today, I realized I have no life after I created a fake Facebook account, posted an insulting message on my wall, and then engaged in a vicious argument with it, just so I could impress my friends. FML

#17026908
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10249) - you deserved it (51855)

On 07/08/2011 at 10:57am - misc - by jen - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my co-worker finally gave me a check for the money he owes me. In the memo line, he wrote "for swallowing". Now I have to go cash it. FML

#16577397
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34516) - you deserved it (6414)

On 06/09/2011 at 12:01pm - intimacy - by Patrick R - United States (Texas)

Today, I shat out a staple. FML

#16576766
332 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37486) - you deserved it (16313)

On 06/09/2011 at 11:04am - health - by wtf - United Kingdom (Edinburgh)

Today, after I successfully blew up a really large balloon, my mom said, in front of my older brother's friends, "Wow, you're going to make some man really happy one day!" FML

#16510202
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41040) - you deserved it (8196)

On 06/05/2011 at 2:48am - intimacy - by e_edge (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I learned that "eating someone out" didn't actually involve food. FML

#16410366
406 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16620) - you deserved it (76982)

On 05/29/2011 at 11:34pm - intimacy - by yummy - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I was pulled over by a cop. He asked for my license and registration so I reached for my center console. I was then greeted with a gun to my ear because my coffee cup supposedly looked like a gun. I stepped out of my car to apologize and I was hit with a big stick. FML

#16152690
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39580) - you deserved it (8344)

On 05/13/2011 at 12:02am - misc - by phant776 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I worked 12 long hours cooped up in my office. Before leaving, my boss asked me whether I'll ever take my job seriously. FML

#16129629
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30241) - you deserved it (2986)

On 05/11/2011 at 1:51pm - work - by jamalinho (man) - Bangladesh (Dhaka)

Today, after being annoyed one too many times by my students' whiney attitudes, I accidentally blurted out, "Quit being such a bitch," to the superintendent's daughter. FML

#16017887
256 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21595) - you deserved it (41225)

On 05/02/2011 at 10:30am - work - by MathTeacher (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, at 21 years old, I am still so flat chested that I can't even fit into training bras meant for 12 year olds. FML

#15679727
588 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49562) - you deserved it (5274)

On 04/07/2011 at 12:55pm - misc - by nerdsgetmehot (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I got back from vacation and walked in on my boyfriend and my brother in my bed. FML

#15617038
351 comments

I agree, your life sucks (106115) - you deserved it (7463)

On 04/03/2011 at 4:06am - intimacy - by Now Single - Reserved

Today, while sleeping, I heard an explosion. My neighbor then knocked on my door and informed me that he had just hit my car with shrapnel from a cannon. Not only do I not have a car to drive, but I also have to put this claim on my insurance due to my neighbor being on welfare. FML

Today, I printed out a picture of the popular girl in school as a sort of 'model' for how I wanted my hair cut. The hairdresser taped the picture to the mirror so he could see. Halfway through, my 'model' came in for an appointment. FML

#14993879
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28751) - you deserved it (19823)

On 02/15/2011 at 8:34pm - misc - by nerdychick (woman) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I had to say a deep sincere speech on assembly in front of the whole college on the recent floods in Queensland. Instead of saying "We are Queenslanders, when we get knocked down, we get back up" I stumbled and said "We are Queenslanders, when we get knocked up..." FML

#14955140
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23547) - you deserved it (4827)

On 02/13/2011 at 5:00am - misc - by knockedup (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I found out that applying toothpaste to your penis to make it taste good for your girlfriend is not a good idea. FML

#14930837
255 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8412) - you deserved it (72053)

On 02/11/2011 at 12:51am - intimacy - by Zibby -

Today, I was pissed that I got a £60 parking ticket so rang my friend to rant about it. I then got pulled over by the cops for using my phone, and was fined £120. FML

#14807320
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8785) - you deserved it (62512)

On 02/02/2011 at 2:12am - money - by Anonymous - United Kingdom



Korrig'Anne's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Korrig'Anne's illustrated FML
  • So, have you ordered it? Have you got it? No? Yes? Do you know any idea of what I'm talking about? OK, for the normal people, I'm talking about the new iPhone 6. Apparently, it came out today. I'm not…

Friday 19 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: