About lilauer13 : I love to laugh that is why I am on this site. Anything you want to know ask.
lilauer13's FML badges
Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
I like your style
You've liked someone. How cute!
This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
lilauer13's favorite FMLs
Today, I got dressed up for the first time in days to go have sushi with a friend. When I walked out to my car, I noticed that the passenger window was shattered and the car robbed. What's worse is I'd forgotten to lock the side doors anyway. FML
by markyvilla / 04/14/2011 at 9:09pm / United States / Transportation
by fail / 04/14/2011 at 6:27pm / Canada (Ontario) / Health
Today, my boyfriend and I were lying in bed together, and I was in a snuggly mood. I rolled over to gaze lovingly into his eyes and whisper sweet nothings to him in the darkness. His response? "Dear God! Did somebody fart in your mouth?!" FML
by Anonymous / 04/01/2011 at 12:32am / United States / Love
Today, I went to see my banker. As we were finishing everything up, I leaned forward to sign something. As I went back to sit down, my 2 year old pulled the chair out from under me, and I crashed down to the floor. FML
by verasam01 / 02/24/2011 at 7:37pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Animals
Today, my boyfriend snuck into my house and hid in my closet. Knowing that I have a phobia of people jumping out of closets, he nonetheless thought it would be funny to see how I'd react. I had a panic attack and was taken to the hospital. FML
by Anonymous / 02/24/2011 at 3:56am / United States (California) / Health
Today, I went to my son's high school play. The moment I arrived at the auditorium, I shouted out his name to let him know I made it. Thinking I was a student, a teacher yelled, "SHUT UP AND SIT DOWN!" Scared out of my mind, I quickly obeyed, to mass giggling from the kids. FML
by Annie / 02/24/2011 at 1:39am / United States (Tennessee) / Kids
by failed / 02/23/2011 at 5:06am / Switzerland (Vaud) / Intimacy
by Jules / 02/21/2011 at 2:59am / United States (California) / Love
Today, while trying on bras in the changing room, I wanted to see what my friend's bra looked like on her. Not wishing to leave my changing room in my underwear, I wriggled under her door. When I got through, my bra had come nearly all the way down and when I tried getting back, I got stuck. FML
by O.o / 02/20/2011 at 3:15am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 02/19/2011 at 9:51am / Ireland (Dublin) / Miscellaneous
by PlayboyBunny / 02/19/2011 at 2:20am / United States (Texas) / Love
Today, instead of pushing me away or simply stopping for a minute, my girlfriend kept kissing me as she was trying to get phlegm out of her throat. The slimy goo ended up in the back of my mouth. I can still taste it. FML
by Anonymous / 02/18/2011 at 2:35am / Canada / Miscellaneous
Today, I ate at Chipotle. There was a girl sitting alone, so I asked if I could eat lunch with her. She said yes, and as I sat down I tried to open my bag of chips. When trying to do so, my hand slipped, and I punched myself in the face. She laughed, and promptly left. FML
by justmyluck? / 02/17/2011 at 10:02pm / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, my neighbor's 4-year-old daughter came up to me and asked if she could have my dog. When I… 2Today, after working for Uber for a few weeks I realized that my driver rating was dropping. After… 3Today, I received a phone call, angry at me for not calling my dad on Father's Day. When I told her…